Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
I found this in the Police and Fire the other day:
Cold pizza
A local pizzeria contacted Sault Police Saturday evening after they
were unable to find anyone at their intended destination.
A police investigation determined that a local woman wished to have
a pizza delivered to her apartment, but did not have any minutes
left on her cell phone. The woman did, however, have text messaging
capabilities and contacted one of her friends on the west coast
requesting that she phone in her order.
The Washington woman apparently had all the details correct, except
for the apartment number, sending the delivery man to an unoccupied
residence. By the time the misunderstanding was sorted out the
delivery man had already departed and the pizza was presumably cold.
The would-be customer apparently worked out an agreement with the
pizzeria management allowing police to close the books on this
investigation.
buffalo says That is creative use of a cell phone and definitely
thinking
outside the box. Alternatively the person could used the 911
function
of her cell phone which remains active and asked them to order
a pizza for her. ( Hello what is the nature of your emergency? )
Ok so it is a slow day and the brain isn't running on all 8
cylinders yet
so I will wish you a good weekend.... buffalo
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~ Hold them hostage until bra-less Victoria's Secret models storm
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
Empty grave?
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I wouldn't have
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Unromantic
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Hooker Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A group of one hundred freshmen from McGill University each
contributed 10 bucks to the kitty. When the money was collected,
they
drew lots to see which one would have the night's pleasure of
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Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Doctor," a man told his psychotherapist, "My wife uses her vibrator
every evening and for a long time. What should I do?"
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her
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On his wedding night Johnson kissed his bride on the forehead then
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out."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A fellow picked up a girl in a bar and took her home with him. After
some preliminary drinks and talk, they got undressed, climbed into
bed and generally got organized for a leg over.
After a few minutes, the girl started laughing.
The fellow asked her what she found so amusing.
"Your bat," she replied. "It's a bit on the small side."
Feelings hurt, he replied: "It's not used to playing in Yankee
Stadium."
Bob was trying to avoid the draft, so he went down to the Draft
Board
wearing lipstick.
"Do you always wear lipstick?" asked the Sergeant.
Bob, feeling confident this will keep him from being drafted,
replies, "Oh yes ALWAYS."
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You won't get chapped lips."
A blonde teenage girl says to her doctor, "You prescribed me birth
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"And how is it going?"
"I think it's ok, but I'd like to have them bigger."
The doctor was surprised, "You mean stronger?"
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"But why BIGGER?"
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Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sue: I just don't share the enthusiasm
some new parents have for babies.
Barb: Yeah, I know what you mean.
Sue: Last week I spent a whole afternoon
with Janie and her two brats, and my
Fallopian tubes tied themselves!
~~~~~~
A guy walks out of a house of ill repute and sits down on a park
bench,
deep
in thought.
"Man!" he says to himself. "What a business! They've got it. They
sell
it.
And they've still got it!"
~~~~~~~
He looked deep into the eyes of the woman he loved and said,
"My heart is broken. I saw you with another man yesterday."
"Oh don't be silly!" she replied, "That was just my husband,
you know there's no one but you."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Viagra Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic
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Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in
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DO.
Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast
implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means
that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky
Boobs and huge erect penis' and absolutely no recollection of what
to do with them.
Jim Tenn
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Surfin Surfari
AC Spark Plug Plant Demolition Via Tom
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Spell Check
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Internet Explorer Saves Files As Bitmaps
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Movie Chips
Ernest Borgnines Tip For A Long Life
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Finish Jackie
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Flirting Garbage men
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Football Season
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They Were Expendable
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Travolta
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Trying To Ride For Free
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Village Idiots
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Water Bike
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Love 2008
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Love Boat
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Lucha
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Luckiest Man On The Planet
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Lucky 1
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rant Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
How about a Rant from Dennis Miller
I don't care what your hobby is before puberty hits, because
as soon as it does, nature assigns you a new one. Let's just
say that when I was 14 I was treated for tennis elbow, and I
didn't even own a racquet. I wasn't exactly subtle about my
self-discovery either. I had tiki torches all around my bed,
a poster of Farrah Fawcett on my ceiling and a spring-loaded
tissue dispenser on my nightstand while I worked my own
crank like it was the gearshift on a Volkswagen bus that I
was trying to rock out of a mudhole. Ah, the good old
days--last Thursday.
You know, there was a time when men dreaded getting old
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But thanks to modern medicine, couples are having sex
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I guess like all things in this era of unfettered capitalism,
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on your mind: why in the hell is everybody else on this bus
starin' at me?
Myron
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
its helpful
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cell phones
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Nudes On A Park Bench
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The Bears Do It
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Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
There was a young lady from Cheam
Who tried out a breast-growing cream.
She awoke in the night
With a terrible fright--
Another had grown in between!
All Hail to the glandular girlie...
The sight of whose bust makes you squirrely.
It is never too late
to manipulate
And, of course, it is never too early!
There was a young lady of Gloucester,
Met a passionate fellow who tossed her.
She wasn't much hurt,
But he dirtied her skirt,
So think of the anguish it cost her.
Karl K
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was at my bank today. There was a short line.
Just one lady in front of me .
An Asian lady who was trying to exchange yen for dollars.
It was obvious she was a little irritated . . .
She asked the teller,
'Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla fo yen.
Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?'
The teller shrugged his shoulders and said,
'Fluctuations.
The Asian lady says, 'Fluc you white people,too!'
Peggy
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Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I walked in on the wife the other day struggling with the
ironing board. She usually keeps it folded up and out of
the way behind the laundry room door and then pulls it out
on the rare occasion something actually needs ironing,
like one of my dress shirts or a blouse she's planning on
wearing.
She was pulling and yanking on the thing when she saw me
and declared, " You need to go out and buy me a new
ironing board. It's almost impossible to get this thing's
legs open."
"Now you know what I have to deal with," I responded.
Myron
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1530
Breakfast in Bed
Dad is sleeping quite nicely when Katie starts to pull off his
covers.
BJ: Hey what the..?
Katie: Time to wake up father. Sandi has made you breakfast.
Sandi enters with a small plate with a glass of milk.
BJ: Why thank you Sandi. Why do I get breakfast in bed?
Sandi blushing: Because you are Daddy.
BJ: Hmmm this is good. What is it Sandi?
Sandi: Squirrel. I killed it fresh this morning and Rudy grilled
it for me.
Pitoey!!!
Sandi: What is the matter Daddy do you not like squirrel?
BJ: I had squirrel when I was a child at my uncles farm but we shot
it.
I daresay you killed this squirrel with you teeth.
Sandi: Of course! I am a hunter. Well if you do not want ... may
I?
BJ: Of course...well I guess I am up for the day.
The herd in Guthrie
(Sandi was eating squirrel this morning for breakfast as I was
heading
for work. Katie did pull the blanket off of me this morning and
barked at
me to get up.. my girls what am I to do with them?)
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
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Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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