Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
Today is the third day of above freezing temps and the streets are
a mess. There are deep ruts in the ice on the side streets and in
places the water is almost a foot deep. Yesterday morning after
a good rain all night there was a thick layer of ice everywhere and
the schools were closed.
Monday night Buffy had taken the Suburban and went home and I
was in bed watching Bear jump off waterfalls and the phone rang.
Buffy had forgotten to take cigarettes with her and only had 4 left.
She didn't want to get Eva dressed again and take her out to come
here and get more so she wanted me to walk some over. I thought
about the slush , water, rain, and ruts in the road and told her
that
wasn't happening so she asked me to ask Sandy to bring some
over.
I finished watching the show and decided to walk over there and
when I got there, she was chatting with a friend who had driven
over.
Buffy said "How did you get over here, Did you walk?" Well duh
what did she think I did, fly? Then she said," I didn't expect you
to
walk over, I expected you to send Mom." Next time she runs out of
smokes she better be ready to quit cold turkey heh heh.
Enjoy your chips and winter is coming back soon.
buffalo
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Gorilla Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A small zoo in Kentucky obtained a very rare species of gorilla.
Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to
handle.
Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The
gorilla was in heat. To make matters worse,
there was no male gorilla available.
Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Bobby Lee
Walton, a
redneck part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages.
Bobby Lee,
like most rednecks, had little sense but possessed ample ability
to satisfy
a female of any species.
The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Bobby Lee was
approached
with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla
for $500.00?
Bobby Lee showed some interest, but said he would have to think
the matter
over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would
accept their
offer, but only under five conditions:
'First', Bobby Lee said, 'I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips.'
The Keeper
quickly agreed to this condition.
'Second', he said, 'She must wear a 'Dale Earnhardt Forever'
T-Shirt.'
The keeper again readily agreed to this condition.
'Third', he said, 'you can't never tell no one about this.'
The keeper again readily agreed to this condition.
'Fourth', Bobby Lee said, 'I want all the children raised
Southern Baptist.'
Once again it was agreed.
'And last,' Bobby Lee said, 'I'll need another week to come up with
the $500.00.
Jim
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
confused bird
http://www.thepostm
a big pothole
http://www.thepostm
I assure you
http://www.thepostm
Gardening
http://www.buffalos
<a href=" http://www.buffalos
Your right hand
http://www.buffalos
<a href=" http://www.buffalos
Fido
http://www.buffalos
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Snail Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A wife and her husband were having a dinner party for
some important guests. The wife was very excited about
this and wanted everything to be perfect. At the very
last minute, she realized that she didn't have any
snails for the dinner party, so she asked her husband
to run down to the beach with the bucket to gather some
snails.
Very grudgingly he agreed. He took the bucket, walked
out the door, down the steps, and out to the beach. As
he was collecting the snails, he noticed a beautiful
woman strolling alongside the water just a little
further down the beach.
He kept thinking to himself, "Wouldn't it be great if
she would even just come down and talk to me?" He
went back to gathering the snails.
All of a sudden he looked up, and the beautiful woman
was standing right over him. They started talking and
she invited him back to her place. They ended up
spending the night together. At seven o'clock the next
morning he woke up and exclaimed, "Oh no!!! My wife's
dinner party!!"
He gathered all his clothes, put them on real fast,
grabbed his bucket, and ran out the door. He ran down
the beach all the way to his apartment. He ran up the
stairs of his apartment. He was in such a hurry that
when he got to the top of the stairs, he dropped the
bucket of snails. There were snails all down the
stairs. The door opened just then, with a very angry
wife standing in the door way wondering where he's
been all this time.
He looked at the snails all down the steps, then he
looked at her, then back at the snails and said, "Come
on guys, we're almost there!!"
Randy
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Random Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The young man was trying to impress his Jewish girlfriend during
Hanukkah and was totally shocked when she slapped him after he asked
if he could light-up her labia menorah.
Two gals setting in cocktail lounge. Time is about 8:30 P.M. Said
one:
"It looks like a dull evening. By golly, if I'm not in bed by 10
o'clock, I'm going home!"
Did you hear Tonya Harding and Michael Jackson bought Aqueduct
Racetrack? She's going to do the handicapping and he's going to ride
the three-year-olds.
A couple were applying for a marriage license. "Your name?" "Ole
Olson." "And yours?" "Lena Olson." "Any connection?" The bride
blushed. "Only vunce. He yumped me."
Usually the staff of the company play football. The middle level
managers are more interested in Tennis. The top management usually
has
a preference for Golf. Conclusion: The further you go up the
corporate
ladder, the smaller the balls get.
The locale was a nudist colony. The boy and the girl were strolling
through the woods. Shyly his words reached her blushing ears: "Don't
look now but I think I'm falling in love with you."
Did you know that Muslims face Mecca to pray; New York Reform Jews
face the 'Stage Delicatessen'
Why can't a penis be 12 inches long?
Because 12 inches is a foot.
How are airplanes and women alike?
They both have cockpits
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parrot Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Three nuns passed every day through a street that led them from
Church to a Reformatory. They noticed a parrot that stood at the
entrance of a big residential house. Every time they passed in
front of that house, the bird would pronounce three sequential
colors.
One day, they heard, "yellow, blue, black."
One of the nuns noticed that those colors perfectly matched the
colors of their underwear. She mentioned her discovery to the
other two nuns, but both were reluctant to believe that could be
possible.
The next day, they all wore black underwear and passed in front
of the house, and very precisely the parrot spoke,
"black, black, black."
Hearing that, the three nuns were astonished! One of the nuns
spoke up,
"Girls, tomorrow we are going to trick that bird." Saying that,
she recommended that the next day, none of them should be wearing
any underwear under their vestments.
Respecting their agreement, the next day they wore no underwear,
and proceeded to pass in front of the parrot's house.
Initially, the parrot looked a bit puzzled, he swung back and
forth on his perch.
Then, after a while, the Parrot said,
"Straight, Straight, Curly!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Penis Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A gentleman goes to see the doctor about getting something done
about his missing penis, which he lost in the war. The doctor
asks the man how many males were in his family and the gentleman
replied seven. The doctor said if they all agreed, he could take
an inch off of each male and the gentleman would have a eight
inch penis.
The gentleman asked the other males in his family if they would
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and to come back and see him in a week.
The next week the gentleman goes back to see the doctor and the
doctor asked him how his new penis was working. The gentleman
replied,
"Great doc, but I only have one question. Who's brilliant idea
was it to put grandpa's part in the middle?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Urinal Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
So here I am in the men's room, standing at the urinal ready to
relieve myself. There was a row of three of them and I was on the
left. Someone else comes in. Now, for you ladies, it is impolite to
look closely or stare at other people when they are standing in such
a position (but you can't hardly help but see a glimmer through
peripheral vision) and certainly, if you look, you keep the eyes
shoulder high. So it was obvious, from that casual glance, there was
something different here.
The person who came in was a friend of mine and he was starting -
staring at the urinal next to mine. So I look too, and there is a
quarter down there. Well fine - it can just stay there. I mean,
would you? But Denny just stared at it for about 30 seconds. Then
he whips out his wallet and before you can say "boo" a $10 bill
joins
the quarter! What in the world is going on here? Then he reaches in
and fishes out the bill and the quarter.
"Denny," I say, "What in the hell are you doing?"
"Well, you didn't think I was going to go in there for just a
quarter
did you?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Grandpa Bill and Me
http://silverandgol
carolyn w/ I Wish
http://carolynsprec
John w/ I Don't Want To Set The World On Fire
http://heavens-
hyacinth poetry corner/ Love
http://hyacinth.
Fears
http://www.carolspo
What Is Love 2?
http://www.shangral
*+*+*+*+*+*+
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Surfin Surfari
WWII Posters
http://afsf.
Military Pics
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Leonard Peltier
http://en.wikipedia
http://www.mylifeis
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Free Online Scans
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Animal World
Doggie Zone
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Kitty Korner
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Movie Chips
Taint Taster
http://www.buffalos
Time to Leave Home
http://www.buffalos
Triceratits
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Un BarDame
http://www.buffalos
Viagra Commercial
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uh 60 IN mOSUL
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Muschel
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My family Reunion
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National Anthem Cactus
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Negotiating a Real Piece of Work
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Poetry Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Great Aussie Love Poem
Of Course I Love Ya Darling You're A Bloody Top Notch Bird
And When I Say You're Gorgeous I Mean Every Single Word
So Ya Bum Is On The Big Side I Dont Mind A Bit Of Flab
It Means That When I'm Ready There's Somethin' There To Grab
So Your Belly Isn't Flat No More I Tell Ya, I Don't Care
So Long As When I Cuddle Ya I Can Get My Arms Round There
No Sheila Who Is Your Age Has Nice Round Perky Breasts
They Just Gave Into Gravity But I Know Ya Did Ya Best
I'm Tellin Ya The Truth Now I Never Tell Ya Lies
I Think It's Very Sexy That You've Got Dimples On Ya Thighs
I Swear Upon Me Nannas Grave The Moment That We Met
I Thought U Was As Good As I Was Ever Gonna Get
No Matter Wot U Look Like I'll Always Love Ya Dear
Now Shut Up While The Footys On And Get Me Bloody Beer!
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The One Touch Cordless Knife is the portable, lightweight
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Additional Ordering Details:
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Foot-in-mouth
http://able2laff.
Grateful
http://able2laff.
Almost always, actually
http://able2laff.
Fart
http://www.buffalos
<a href=" http://www.buffalos
Edible Panties
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<a href=" http://www.buffalos
Don't you dare
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Big City Slider - Mini Burger Cooker
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
In the kitchen he wanted to boff her.
Satisfaction he tried to proffer.
She replied, "I am sold,
But the floor is too cold."
So he made her a counter-offer.
____________
A methodical fellow named Wade,
Could recall every girl that he'd laid.
He recorded each poke,
Every thrust, every stroke,
And precisely how much he'd been paid.
____________
Priscilla, her breasts bouncing gaily,
Liked to screw with a friendly Israeli.
Just the thought of his schmuck
Got her ready to fuck,
Which they did six or seven times daily.
<snaged by>
Ross
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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and bugs out. Just slide and store - it's that easy!
Order now and we'll DOUBLE your order!
View Web Version
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man returns from Africa feeling very ill. He visits his doctor,
who
immediately rushes the guy to the Mayo Clinic.
The man wakes up to the ringing of a telephone in a stark room at
the
hospital and answers it.
"We've received the results from your tests," says the doctor on the
other
end of the line. "Bad news-you have Ebola."
"Oh, my God," cries the man. "Doc! What am I going to do?"
"Don't worry. First, we're going to put you on a diet of pizza,
pancakes,
and pita bread," says the doctor.
"Will that cure me?"
"No...it's the only food that'll fit under the door."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man goes to a fancy dress party wearing only a glass jar on his
penis.
Woman asks, 'What are you?'
He says, 'I'm a Fireman'
'But you're only wearing a glass jar?', says the woman.
'Exactly! In an emergency, break glass, pull knob and I'll come as
fast as I can!'
Randy
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1521
The Games People Play
Rudy: Dad we were wondering if you would talk to us about other
games you played as a kid? We really liked marbles and had a blast
with it.
Katie: Yeah we had a lot of fun.
Sandi: Sure what games did you play back in the stone age days
daddy?
BJ: Okay we played a game called Kick the Can. Here are the rules
for
it.
Rudy looks it over: Looks simple.
BJ: Okay here is one called Hide and Seek it was probably the most
common game and everyone played it when I was young. One person
covers their eyes and counts to 20 while everyone else hides. With
you
guys it would be tough due to your heighten senses of smell, hearing
and such.
Rudy: I have a sense of such?
BJ: Of course we played Cowboys and Indians. We used peashooters
and those were fun, slingshots and a thing called grasshopper guns
made
from clothespins that could get pretty nasty.
Katie talking to herself: Peashooters huh?
BJ: We invented games... We were never bored as kids.
Rudy: You never needed batteries as kids?
BJ: Nope none needed.
Sandi: Ouch what was that?
Rudy: Ow! I think I was bit by a bug.
BJ: I think we have been hit by a peashooter.
Katie is grinning and trying to hit a large straw.
Rudy: Get her!
The Herd in Guthrie
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
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Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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