THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
"Limitations live only in our minds.
But if we use our imaginations,
our possibilities become limitless."
Jamie Paolinetti
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine..
And those who don't and are always
seen with a bottle of water in their hand.
As Ben Franklin said:
In wine there is wisdom,
In beer there is freedom,
In water there is bacteria.
In a number of carefully controlled trials,
Scientists have demonstrated that if we drink
1 litre of water each day,
At the end of the year we would have absorbed
More than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. Coli) - bacteria
Found in feces.
In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.
However,
We do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer
Because alcohol has to go through a purification process
Of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting.
Remember:
Water = Poop,
Wine = Health
Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid,
Than to drink water and be full of $hit..
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_________________
THE COMICS
Kermit
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n071.html
the coffee pot
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n072.html
parenting
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n073.html
your husband always said he was sterile
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n074.html
thats what you get for wanting to be on top
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n075.html
trickle down economics
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n076.html
the elevator
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n077.html
out fishing
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n078.html
rubbing it
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n079.html
hey Fred
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n080.html
_____________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
mens underwear
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1148.html
justice for Osama
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1149.html
a story in the newspaper
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1150.html
Elmer Fudd reads porno
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1151.html
Amos and Andy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1152.html
__________
POWER POINT DISPLAY
the invasion of chinese products
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd725.html
It was the coldest winter ever. Many animals
died because of the cold.The porcupines,
realizing the situation, decided to group together
to keep warm. This way they covered and protected
themselves; but the quills of each one wounded their
closest companions.After awhile, they decided to
distance themselves one from the other and
they began to die, alone and frozen. So they had
to make a choice: either accept the quills of their
companions or disappear from the Earth. Wisely,
they decided to go back to being together. They
learned to live with the little wounds caused by the
close relationship with their companions in
order to receive the heat that came from the others.
This way they were able to survive.
Moral of the story: The best relationship is not the
one that brings together perfect people,
but when each individual learns to live with the
imperfections of others
and can admire the other person's good qualities.
THE REAL MORAL OF THE STORY: J
ust learn to live with the Pricks in your life!
You didn't think I really give a rat's ass about
porcupines did you?
_____________
A woman takes a lover home during the day while
her husband is at work.
Her 9-year old son comes home unexpectedly,
sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch.
The woman's husband also comes home. She puts her
lover in the closet, not realizing that the little
boy is in there already.
The little boy says, ' Dark in here.'
The man says, 'Yes, it is.'
Boy: 'I have a baseball..'
Man: 'That's nice'
Boy: 'Want to buy it?'
Man: 'No, thanks.'
Boy: 'My Dad's outside.'
Man: 'OK, how much?'
Boy: '$250'
In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy a
nd the lover are in the closet together.
Boy: 'Dark in here.'
Man: 'Yes, it is.'
Boy: 'I have a baseball glove.'
The lover, remembering the last time, asks the boy, 'How much?'
Boy: '$750'
Man: 'Sold.'
A few days later, the Dad says to the boy, 'Grab your glove,
let's go outside and have a game of catch.'
The boy says, 'I can't, I sold my baseball and my glove.'
The Dad asks, 'How much did you sell them for?'
Boy: '$1,000'
The Dad says, 'That's terrible to over charge your friends
like that...that is way more than those two things cost.
I'm taking you to church, to confession.'
They go to the church and the Dad makes the little boy sit
in the confessional booth and closes the door..
The boy says, 'Dark in here.'
The priest says, 'Don't start that shit again;
you're in my closet now.
____________
Father's Day was near when I brought my five-year-old son,
Vince, to the card store. Inside, I showed him the cards for
dads and told him to pick one.
When I looked back, Vince was picking up one card after another,
opening them up and quickly shoving them back into slots, every
which way. I asked. "Have you found a nice card for Daddy yet?"
"No," he replied. "I'm looking for one with money in it."
BUFFALO BILL
Hot Tub Mishap
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jkjkkol.htm
How To Get A Divorce
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jkhkjh.htm
McRonalds
http://www.buffaloschips.com/2wds.htm
THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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