welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
where the world goes for its daily dose of humor!
(made in the USA)
THIS EZINE IS FREE TO ALL WHO ASK FOR IT
adult humor. wanna subscribe? send a blank email to:
PostmansCorner-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
Disclaimer.:
Don't like what you read?
keep yer comments to yerself,
I don't give a rip:)
wanna unsubscribe? don't bug the list owner, he'll just send you a nasty email.
just hit reply to this email and...cya!!!!!!!
Good morning postman fans!
A letter from a postman fan
Tenofspades says:
Hey postman:
you are always talking about these tv gadgets and such. But you had
one a long time ago that I bought and it was the best thing I ever did!
With 3 german shepards, I got my moneysworth on it, how come you never
advertise the petvac?? the readers would appreciate it.
Tenofspades.
Hey Tenofspades,
Ok, I'll take your word for it!
the postman.
Tired of all those grooming gadgets that don't work?
and the mess?
With petvac there is no mess to clean up
Pet vac vacuums as you brush!!!
-Wet & Dry Pet Care System Provides Effective, Hassle Free Grooming for all Pets!
-Shed Eliminator!...The only Professional Suction De-Shedding Tool in the World!
-Only 2 Easy Payments of $19.99 plus s&h
satisfaction guaranteed
http://www.tinyurl.com/28ntyj
Are you a fisherman? You need to listen to this for a minute. You might recall,
I recently purchased a motorbike? Well, I turned around and the war department got me
the pocketfisherman so I could use the bike to go fishing. Its pretty cool! or, just throw it in
your glove compartment so its handy if you want to fish and don't have your stuff with you!
It's always ready for the fish to strike! Simply unfold the rod until it
snaps into a fully extended position and you're ready to fish.
This convenient design allows you to attach the Pocket Fisherman to your
belt easily and it's small enough to fit in your glove compartment.
It's the best gift you can give to any kid or adult! You've seen this
Pocket Fisherman for years and always wanted one — now get it for only $29.95.
Bonus Offer - get additionals for only $14.95
Pocket Fisherman Features:
1. Hinged Double-Flex Rod That Folds When Not In Use
2. Mini Tackle Box Contained In The Handle Includes Hook, Line & Sinker
3. Reel Is Replaceable With Reel Cartridge
4. Automatic Anti-Reverse Prevents The Handle From Turning Backwards
http://www.tinyurl.com/352lwb
FROM: THE INVESTIGATIVE REPORTS BUREAU OF
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
At an archaeological exploratory dig in Glasgow England,
Archaeologists believe they have discovered a 5000 year old skeleton.
They also believe it may be evidence of one of the first politicians.
According to a new study conducted by an ACLU sponsored think tank
in Maryland, which was funded by a 5million dollar grant from The food and
drug administration, studies show
Too much alcohol may not only be bad for your health, it might
also impair your sense of smell. A new study found alcohol-
dependent people were less able to detect and identify certain odors.
Researchers point out that aside from its important role
as a warning device, such as detecting the presence of fire
or poisonous fumes, an impaired sense of smell can detract
from the overall quality of life.
Patrons at the local pub noted that there are times when
they are very thankful for this impairment. Citing such times
as worshipping the porcelain throne, waking up in the alley
out back, and rolling over in the morning and discovering
what you brought home last night, which tends to send you
to the first place mentioned.
So it seems that there are times this impairment might
rate a little higher on the scale of quality of life than most
people believe.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
THE COMICS
there's an easier way
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s065.html
mission impossible
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s066.html
you know its heaven if...
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s067.html
Dennis and Ruff
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s068.html
imprint
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s069.html
the shadow says it all
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s070.html
the rider
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s072.html
that would work better
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s073.html
the pope says
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s074.html
the fourth of July
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s075.html
THE JOKES
Little Johnny was playing Washington, DC taxi driver. He was using a
discarded vegetable crate for the body and the hub cap from a Cadillac
for the steering wheel. "Hey look at me!" he squealed. "Here I am, a
real DC taxi driver, driving up Pennsylvania Avenue at 70 miles and hour
and picking up speed." As he was busily steering, he was also making the
accompanying noises of blowing the horn, cursing out pedestrians who ran
across the street in front of him, giving drivers the one-finger salute
who got in his way, and screeching his brakes as he tried to avoid being
hit or hitting someone.
Little Mary was sitting on her tricycle watching intently. Becoming
interested in what he was doing and all the excitement he was having,
she asked, "Johnny, can I please go riding with you. When you take that
senator to his office, can I ride with you? Pleeeeeease Johnny!,
Pleeeeeeeease!"
"Wait just a minute," little Johnny said, as he cut back the sound of
his motor and began to slow down the sounds of his motor. "I'll drop
this guy off, swing around the block, come up the right way on that
one-say street you're on and take you up for a quick ride."
Little Mary climbed on the back of the vegetable crate and said, "I'm
in, let's go!"
"Hey, fasten your seat belt," little Johnny commanded. "I'm a real taxi
driver and I like to drive fast. The faster I drive, the more money I
make and the more people I hear scream. So, prepare yourself, I'm fixing
to make the tires squeal!"
After checking things out and revving up the engine, off the went. About
the time he was up to 80 miles and hour, and had narrowly missed a tour
bus, Little Mary announced that she had to pee pee.
"Hey, don't make to stop right now, I'm on the way to the airport to
catch a flight for some guy who's late. I'm sorry, but you'll just have
to hold on for a second," Little Johnny said quite concerned with her
discomfort. "You've got to hang in there for another minute or so!"
Little Johnny heard something that sounded like water running and when
he looked down he saw a stream of yellow running between his feet. Then,
he glanced around and to see better he turned around and stared -- there
sat Little Mary with her 'girlhood' exposed.
"Gee, that little thing is cute," he said, "real cute. Would you mind if
I touch it?"
She nodded that he could, and he did -- ever so very briefly. "Hey,
would you like to kiss it?" she asked.
"Hell no, I don't. You got me all wrong. You must have forgotten just
who you're riding with," exclaimed Little Johnny. "I ain't Bill Clinton
or Gary Condit, I'm just a DC taxi driver!"
________________
The 15-year-old daughter brought home a young Naval Aviator to meet her
parents. During dinner, the pilot happened to mention that he was from
Glen Burnie. The Mother said, "What a coincidence. My husband and I
lived there 18 years ago when we were first married."
The pilot got a strange look on his face and changed the topic of
conversation. The daughter fell strangely silent.
After he left, the teen said, "Thanks a lot, Mom. I told him I was 18.
Now I'll have to tell him that I was illegitimate."
______________
The reason
A girl was telling a boy friend that she realized she was very popular, but she didn't know why.
"Do you suppose it's my complexion?" she asked.
"No."
"My figure?"
"No."
"My personality?"
"No."
"I give up."
"That's it."
At the immigration office:
Q.: "Name?"
A.: "Abdul Dalah Sarafi."
Q.: "Sex?"
A.: "Four times a week."
Q.: "No, no, no... Male or female?"
A.: "Male, female... sometimes camel..."
________________
John the farmer was in the Fertilized Egg business. He had several hundred
young layers (hens), called "pullets" and eight or ten roosters,whose job it
was to fertilize the eggs.
The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn't perform went into the
soup pot and was replaced.That took an awful lot of his time so he bought a
set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters.
Each bell had a different tone so John could tell from a distance, which
rooster was performing..Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an
efficiency report simply by listening to the bells.
The farmer's favorite rooster was old Butch, and a very fine specimen he was
too.But on this particular morning John noticed old Butch's bell hadn't
rung at all! John went to investigate.The other roosters were chasing
pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would
run for cover.But to Farmer John's amazement, Butch had his bell in his beak
so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to
the next one.
John was so proud of Butch, he entered him in the Renfrew County Fair and
Butch became an overnight sensation among the judges.The result...The judges
not only awarded Butch the No Bell Piece Prize but they also awarded him the
Pulletsurprise as well.
Clearly Butch was a politician in the making: who else but a politician could figure out
how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at
sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.
BUFFALO'S
movies
Scottish
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/041616.htm
Snow Car
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/041617.htm
Titties & Beer
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/041618.htm
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
where the world goes for its daily dose of humor!
(made in the USA)
THIS EZINE IS FREE TO ALL WHO ASK FOR IT
adult humor. wanna subscribe? send a blank email to:
PostmansCorner-
Disclaimer.:
Don't like what you read?
keep yer comments to yerself,
I don't give a rip:)
wanna unsubscribe? don't bug the list owner, he'll just send you a nasty email.
just hit reply to this email and...cya!!!
Good morning postman fans!
A letter from a postman fan
Tenofspades says:
Hey postman:
you are always talking about these tv gadgets and such. But you had
one a long time ago that I bought and it was the best thing I ever did!
With 3 german shepards, I got my moneysworth on it, how come you never
advertise the petvac?? the readers would appreciate it.
Tenofspades.
Hey Tenofspades,
Ok, I'll take your word for it!
the postman.
Tired of all those grooming gadgets that don't work?
and the mess?
With petvac there is no mess to clean up
Pet vac vacuums as you brush!!!
-Wet & Dry Pet Care System Provides Effective, Hassle Free Grooming for all Pets!
-Shed Eliminator!.
-Only 2 Easy Payments of $19.99 plus s&h
satisfaction guaranteed
http://www.tinyurl.
Are you a fisherman? You need to listen to this for a minute. You might recall,
I recently purchased a motorbike? Well, I turned around and the war department got me
the pocketfisherman so I could use the bike to go fishing. Its pretty cool! or, just throw it in
your glove compartment so its handy if you want to fish and don't have your stuff with you!
It's always ready for the fish to strike! Simply unfold the rod until it
snaps into a fully extended position and you're ready to fish.
This convenient design allows you to attach the Pocket Fisherman to your
belt easily and it's small enough to fit in your glove compartment.
It's the best gift you can give to any kid or adult! You've seen this
Pocket Fisherman for years and always wanted one — now get it for only $29.95.
Bonus Offer - get additionals for only $14.95
Pocket Fisherman Features:
1. Hinged Double-Flex Rod That Folds When Not In Use
2. Mini Tackle Box Contained In The Handle Includes Hook, Line & Sinker
3. Reel Is Replaceable With Reel Cartridge
4. Automatic Anti-Reverse Prevents The Handle From Turning Backwards
http://www.tinyurl.
FROM: THE INVESTIGATIVE REPORTS BUREAU OF
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
At an archaeological exploratory dig in Glasgow England,
Archaeologists believe they have discovered a 5000 year old skeleton.
They also believe it may be evidence of one of the first politicians.
According to a new study conducted by an ACLU sponsored think tank
in Maryland, which was funded by a 5million dollar grant from The food and
drug administration, studies show
Too much alcohol may not only be bad for your health, it might
also impair your sense of smell. A new study found alcohol-
dependent people were less able to detect and identify certain odors.
Researchers point out that aside from its important role
as a warning device, such as detecting the presence of fire
or poisonous fumes, an impaired sense of smell can detract
from the overall quality of life.
Patrons at the local pub noted that there are times when
they are very thankful for this impairment. Citing such times
as worshipping the porcelain throne, waking up in the alley
out back, and rolling over in the morning and discovering
what you brought home last night, which tends to send you
to the first place mentioned.
So it seems that there are times this impairment might
rate a little higher on the scale of quality of life than most
people believe.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
THE COMICS
there's an easier way
http://www.thepostm
mission impossible
http://www.thepostm
you know its heaven if...
http://www.thepostm
Dennis and Ruff
http://www.thepostm
imprint
http://www.thepostm
the shadow says it all
http://www.thepostm
the rider
http://www.thepostm
that would work better
http://www.thepostm
the pope says
http://www.thepostm
the fourth of July
http://www.thepostm
THE JOKES
Little Johnny was playing Washington, DC taxi driver. He was using a
discarded vegetable crate for the body and the hub cap from a Cadillac
for the steering wheel. "Hey look at me!" he squealed. "Here I am, a
real DC taxi driver, driving up Pennsylvania Avenue at 70 miles and hour
and picking up speed." As he was busily steering, he was also making the
accompanying noises of blowing the horn, cursing out pedestrians who ran
across the street in front of him, giving drivers the one-finger salute
who got in his way, and screeching his brakes as he tried to avoid being
hit or hitting someone.
Little Mary was sitting on her tricycle watching intently. Becoming
interested in what he was doing and all the excitement he was having,
she asked, "Johnny, can I please go riding with you. When you take that
senator to his office, can I ride with you? Pleeeeeease Johnny!,
Pleeeeeeeease!
"Wait just a minute," little Johnny said, as he cut back the sound of
his motor and began to slow down the sounds of his motor. "I'll drop
this guy off, swing around the block, come up the right way on that
one-say street you're on and take you up for a quick ride."
Little Mary climbed on the back of the vegetable crate and said, "I'm
in, let's go!"
"Hey, fasten your seat belt," little Johnny commanded. "I'm a real taxi
driver and I like to drive fast. The faster I drive, the more money I
make and the more people I hear scream. So, prepare yourself, I'm fixing
to make the tires squeal!"
After checking things out and revving up the engine, off the went. About
the time he was up to 80 miles and hour, and had narrowly missed a tour
bus, Little Mary announced that she had to pee pee.
"Hey, don't make to stop right now, I'm on the way to the airport to
catch a flight for some guy who's late. I'm sorry, but you'll just have
to hold on for a second," Little Johnny said quite concerned with her
discomfort. "You've got to hang in there for another minute or so!"
Little Johnny heard something that sounded like water running and when
he looked down he saw a stream of yellow running between his feet. Then,
he glanced around and to see better he turned around and stared -- there
sat Little Mary with her 'girlhood' exposed.
"Gee, that little thing is cute," he said, "real cute. Would you mind if
I touch it?"
She nodded that he could, and he did -- ever so very briefly. "Hey,
would you like to kiss it?" she asked.
"Hell no, I don't. You got me all wrong. You must have forgotten just
who you're riding with," exclaimed Little Johnny. "I ain't Bill Clinton
or Gary Condit, I'm just a DC taxi driver!"
____________
The 15-year-old daughter brought home a young Naval Aviator to meet her
parents. During dinner, the pilot happened to mention that he was from
Glen Burnie. The Mother said, "What a coincidence. My husband and I
lived there 18 years ago when we were first married."
The pilot got a strange look on his face and changed the topic of
conversation. The daughter fell strangely silent.
After he left, the teen said, "Thanks a lot, Mom. I told him I was 18.
Now I'll have to tell him that I was illegitimate.
____________
The reason
A girl was telling a boy friend that she realized she was very popular, but she didn't know why.
"Do you suppose it's my complexion?" she asked.
"No."
"My figure?"
"No."
"My personality?
"No."
"I give up."
"That's it."
At the immigration office:
Q.: "Name?"
A.: "Abdul Dalah Sarafi."
Q.: "Sex?"
A.: "Four times a week."
Q.: "No, no, no... Male or female?"
A.: "Male, female... sometimes camel..."
____________
John the farmer was in the Fertilized Egg business. He had several hundred
young layers (hens), called "pullets" and eight or ten roosters,whose job it
was to fertilize the eggs.
The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn't perform went into the
soup pot and was replaced.That took an awful lot of his time so he bought a
set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters.
Each bell had a different tone so John could tell from a distance, which
rooster was performing..
efficiency report simply by listening to the bells.
The farmer's favorite rooster was old Butch, and a very fine specimen he was
too.But on this particular morning John noticed old Butch's bell hadn't
rung at all! John went to investigate.
pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would
run for cover.But to Farmer John's amazement, Butch had his bell in his beak
so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to
the next one.
John was so proud of Butch, he entered him in the Renfrew County Fair and
Butch became an overnight sensation among the judges.The result...The judges
not only awarded Butch the No Bell Piece Prize but they also awarded him the
Pulletsurprise as well.
Clearly Butch was a politician in the making: who else but a politician could figure out
how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at
sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.
BUFFALO'S
movies
Scottish
http://www.buffalos
Snow Car
http://www.buffalos
Titties & Beer
http://www.buffalos
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
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