welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
where the world goes for its daily dose of humor!
(made in the USA)
THIS EZINE IS FREE TO ALL WHO ASK FOR IT
adult humor. wanna subscribe? send a blank email to:
PostmansCorner-
Disclaimer.:
Don't like what you read?
keep yer comments to yerself,
I don't give a rip:)
wanna unsubscribe? don't bug the list owner, he'll just send you a nasty email.
just hit reply to this email and...cya!!!
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
A comment from a postman fan.
Hey postman!
I love your page, I look forward to it every day!
I was wondering. sometime back, you had an offer of free pepsi twist.
And I actually got some! It was the first time I ever got anything for free!
Wow. I was wondering, is that offer still out there? I'd really have some more.
Patti in NY
Says the postman
Sure Patti...here ya go...enjoy!
Martin
GET FREE PEPSI TWIST HERE!
PEPSI TWIST, 12 Cases FREE*!
PEPSI TWIST FREE* SUMMER GIVEAWAY.
>>CLICK HERE to Get 12 FREE* Cases NOW<<
http://www.tinyurl.
AND WHILE YOU ARE AT IT,
wouldn't some FREE PIZZA be good with your Pepsi?
Thick crusts, tasty toppings, savory sauce. Go ahead. Please your palate with America’s favorite Pizza Pie.
Get two DOMINO’S Pizza & Cola Gift Certificates good towards 2 Large Pies with
1 Topping each and 2/2 Liter bottles of Cola! Now that’s amore.
Satisfy your DOMINO'S hankerings the quick & easy way.
http://www.tinyurl.
FROM: THE INVESTIGATIVE REPORTS BUREAU OF
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
Geico insurance company announced today that amid economic downtrends
in the market place, the giant insurance company is branching out in to different
areas. Best known for its car insurance, Geico says it will soon begin offering
new and novel types of insurance policies....
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman!
LET'S GO TO THE MOVIES!
the arrest of Senator Craig
http://www.thepostm
fresh
http://www.thepostm
too much time on their hands
http://www.thepostm
beauty
http://www.thepostm
the cop prank
http://www.thepostm
THE COMICS
the therapist
http://www.thepostm
wishing well
http://www.thepostm
thank goodness Carl
http://www.thepostm
when my ship came in
http://www.thepostm
for my mother in law
http://www.thepostm
obscene phone calls
http://www.thepostm
not tonight Tim
http://www.thepostm
Kemosabe
http://www.thepostm
time to vote
http://www.thepostm
mother says
http://www.thepostm
THE JOKES
One day an old lady went to the doctors because she had an itch in her crotch.
She told the doctor her problem and he said, "You have the crabs".
She informed the doctor that it could not be the crabs because she was
an eighty year old virgin.
She went to another doctor and explained her problem to him.
The doctor said,
"You probably have the crabs".
"No" she said, "I am an eighty year old virgin."
Frustrated, she went to a third doctor.
She said,
"Doctor can you help me?
I have an itch in my crotch.
Don't tell me that it is the crabs because I am an eighty year old
virgin. It can not be the crabs."
The doctor said, "Jump on the table and let's have a look."
After examining, the doctor proclaimed,
"Ma'am, you're right, you do not have the crabs.
This cherry is sooooo old, you have fruit flies."
____________
Q: Why do reindeer have red noses?
A: They are not equipped with ABS and thus tend to bump into
things on slippery surfaces. This is why Santa is often seen
with a red nose (the sleigh doesn't have an airbag, either).
Q: Why does Santa use Elves?
A: There is no trade union for Elves. They're easy to exploit.
Q: Is there really a Mrs. Claus?
A: Highly unlikely. Since Santa is surrounded by male figures
(Elves, reindeer named Rudolph, Donner, Blitzen etc.) his
sexual preference seems to tend towards homosexuality. He is
said to have some problems finding a gerontophile/
for a threesome with a reindeer, though.
Q: Does Santa really live on the North Pole?
A: Uncertain. However, rumor has it that the story of Santa and
the North Pole has nothing to do with the Arctic, but that
Santa is known to frequently ask the Elves and reindeer if he
can shove his pole up north. Obviously, this is related to
the cryptic description "up where the sun don't shine", which
applies to both the North Pole and assholes in general.
____________
As Joe walked out of a brothel, he was overcome by a sudden pang of hunger and
decided to grab a bite to eat at the restaurant across the street. He sat down
and ordered chicken noodle soup. After a few bites, he found a pubic hair in his
soup and told the waitress he wanted a refund. The waitress remonstrated,
"Knowing where you just came from, you're complaining of a hair in your soup?"
Joe replied, "Lady, if I had found a noodle in the 'meal' I ordered from the
brothel, I wouldn't have paid there either!"
____________
Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were.
The first man was an Engineer, the second man was an Accountant,
the third man was a Chemist,,,,,
To show off, the Engineer called his cat,
"T-square, do your stuff."
T-square pranced over to the desk, took out some
paper and pen and promptly drew a circle, a square,
and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.
But the Accountant said his cat could do better.
He called his cat and said,
"Spreadsheet, do your stuff."
Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned
with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies
...........Everyone agreed that was good.
But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said
,,,,,,,,,,,,
Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk,, got a 10 ounce glass
from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop into the glass.
Everyone agreed that was pretty good.
Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, "What can your cat do?"
The Government Employee called his cat and said,,,,,
"Coffee Break,,,,do your stuff."
Coffee Break jumped to his feet,,,,,,,,
ate the cookies,,,,,
drank the milk,,,,,,,,
shit on the paper,
screwed the other three cats,
claimed he injured his back while doing so,
filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions,
put in for Workers Compensation and
went home for the rest of the day on sick leave.
AND THAT'S WHY I WANT TO WORK FOR THE GOVERNMENT
____________
Dear Son:
Your Paw has a job. It's the first one he had in forty-eight years
since we have been married.
We are a little better off now, because we have so much
money now we don't know what to do with it.
Paw gets $47.15 every Thursday, so we thought we ought to do something
about fixing up the house. We sent to Sears & Roebuck for one of those
bathrooms you hear people having in houses. It took a plumber to put it in shape.
On one side of the bathroom is a great long thing something like a pig
trough, only you get in it and wash all over. Over on the other side is a
little white thing they call a sink where you wash your face and hands.
But over in the corner we really got something. This thing, you put one foot
in, wash it clean, then you pull the chain & get fresh water for the
other foot. Two lids come with the thing.
We got no use for them in the bathroom so I'm
using one for the bread board. The other
lid has a hole in it so we use it for a frame for grandfather'
Sears & Roebuck are real nice people to deal with. They sent us a roll
of paper with the outfit. We can't write on it very well, so I'm using it
to wrap Paw's lunch.
Take care of yourself.
Maw
____________
BUFFALO'S MOVIES
Runway
http://www.buffalos
Ballet Class
http://www.buffalos
Biker Rack
http://www.buffalos
LAB LAUGHS
To My Friends
http://www.lablaugh
lab laugh toon
http://www.lablaugh
SEXY CALENDAR
http://www.lablaugh
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman!
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/PostmansCorner
or http://www.thepostmanscorner.net
*To unsubscribe from this group, send a blank email to:
PostmansCorner-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
*To subscribe to this group, send a blank email to:
PostmansCorner-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
*PLZ NOTE: DO NOT send unsubscribe requests to the listowner
(Follow instructions)
Change settings via the Web (Yahoo! ID required)
Change settings via email: Switch delivery to Daily Digest | Switch format to Traditional
Visit Your Group | Yahoo! Groups Terms of Use | Unsubscribe
__,_._,___
No comments:
Post a Comment