THE POSTMAN'S CORNER Cherish yesterday. Dream tomorrow. Live today.  LUCKY CHARMS - FREE* SAMPLE! Moons, stars, hearts, and clovers. Start your morning with a bowl of those magical marshmallow bits. Simply select your favorite flavor LUCKY CHARMS & get 2 FREE* BOXES delivered to your door! Now that's what we call lucky. http://www.thepostm  FREE* SAMPLE of NEW COLGATE MAX FRESH Whitening Toothpaste Brighten your teeth and freshen your breath with NEW COLGATE MAX FRESH Whitening Toothpaste plus breath strips in Cool Mint Flavor. get your FREE* 2-pack sample. http://www.thepostm  NEW! GERBER GRADUATES Yogurt Melts FREE* 8-PACK! Delicious, nutritious, and easy to swallow. Get GERBER GRADUATES Yogurt Melts -- the wholesome snack that children enjoy & moms trust! Act now to receive a FREE* 8-PACK SAMPLE http://www.thepostm Last night I turned on the NAT GEO channel to find a program that brought back child hood memories. The subject was "noodling" While I confess I have never personally engaged in such an activity, I do remember accompanying friends who did. I always found it fascinating but never had the courage to try it. Essentially, for the benefit of those who are city dwellers and never had opportunity to try it, when you are noodling, you are after large catfish. Perhaps that is why I never tried it, I am not fond of catfish myself. Back home, these fish can grow up to 2 and 3 feet long, easily. During spawning season, they will usually find a hole or some place similar to lay eggs. Bare handed, a succesful noodler goes in with both hands reaching for the cat. Defending her young, she will usually attack. If you are successful, you will ram your fist down the throat, grab the cat's gills with the other hand, and pull it from the water, all without net or poles, etc. a true test of sport and skill. What the show did not talk about however, was the fishing I personally enjoyed as a kid. I always preferred the taste of a good smoked carp over a catfish, If you know how to prepare it right, its heavenly. And where I grew up, we had a large population of Scandinavian descendants who though of smoked carp as a delicacy. Anyways,in the spring of the year, the river would flood. And because the land was pretty flat, as it receeded, it left little recess pools behind, and usually tons of huge, juicy carp were left trapped. At night time, my brother and I donned our waders and a couple of very large gunnysacks. One could use a net, but the method we preferred was called "gilling." You Wade out into the pool, when the time is right, you reach down, slip the fingers into the gill, and then grab! Stuff the carp in your sack. You bring them all back home, get daddy to fire up the smoke house, and 2 or 3 days later, you're eatin good !!! If you're really lucky you can manage to catch a few bull frogs, and there is nothing better than smoked carp and frog's legs served up with a little bit of grits or corn bread:) try it sometime! The war department is a fond collector of Thomas Kinkade memorabalia, or whatever. She has graced our home with many such things. and when she saw this, she fell in love and had to have it. I admit, it is pretty cool, and I'd suggest you get one too!  Welcome to a winter wonderland of fun inspired by the art of T homas Kinkade! Cut-crystal snowman combines lights, animation and 3D village draped in "snow". An exclusive MARKET FIRST from The Bradford Editions! Hand-cut of precious crystal and intricately faceted for rich sparkle and prismatic reflections. With his arms outstretched, he invites you to experience the warm winter scene he holds inside - a sculpted Thomas Kinkade village! It features illuminated buildings, plus 10 villagers enjoying the new-fallen "snow" as a moving train circles the track! Finished with a classic "carrot" nose, plus silvery mittens and scarf. Hurry to own yours - strong demand is expected for this Market First and quantities are limited. Click this link to order now: http://www.thepostm We do hope you enjoy today's issue! Cordially Martin aka the postman  THE COMICS the game show http://www.thepostm my whole life http://www.thepostm a long term relationship http://www.thepostm entertainment for seniors http://www.thepostm the nice thing about a cycle http://www.thepostm marriage counselor http://www.thepostm Larry the cable guy http://www.thepostm Sara Palin spoof http://www.thepostm the car theft http://www.thepostm A third grade school teacher was trying to explain to her class the difference between singular and plural. She said, "What do you call it if one woman looks out a window?" Charlotte said, "Singular." The teacher said, "That's right Charlotte. Now, what do you call it if three women are looking out of a window?" Little Johnny raised his hand and blurted out, "A whorehouse!" ____________ Joe was telling his buddy Jack about a recent diagnosis of his high blood pressure. "The doctors told me to quit eating red meat," Joe said, "Well, did you quit," asked Jack. Joe replied, "Sure did. You think I'm a dummy or something? I haven't had a drop of ketchup on my hamburgers since!" ____________ It was entertainment night at the Senior Center . John the hypnotist exclaimed, ' I'm here to put you into a trance. I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience.' The excitement was almost electric as John withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch from his coat. 'I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It's a very special watch. It's been in my family for six generations. back and forth while quietly chanting 'Watch the watch, watch the watch, and watch the watch...' The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the swaying watch, until, suddenly, it slipped from John the hypnotist's fingers and fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces.'SHIT! up the Senior Center! ____________ An old widow and widower named Mary and Steve get married. They are upthere in age, and the romance, engagement and marriage was quick.They hoped they had enough strength to live through their wedding dayand night. After the marriage ceremony, they retire to a nearby hotel. Both arevery nervous. Cautiously they begin to undress in front of eachother. In the process, Mary, the old woman, removes her false teethand puts them in a glass. Mary then removes her prosthetic leg andleans it against the wall. She looks up at her new groom and smiles nervously, and Steve is intently watching... Mary continues. She removes her bra which contains false inserts; she removes a glass eye and gingerly places it in a special box on the nightstand. Againshe shyly smiles at her aged spouse, and Steve continues to stare inan interested manner. As Mary takes off her wig, she realizes that Steve is not making much progress in getting undressed. He's stopped undressing and is juststaring at her. She asks him, "What are you waiting for?" Steve quickly replies, "You know what I want. Take it off and throwit over here!!!" ____________ Helen and Amanda were discussing their busy schedules. Helen said, "Amanda, I must ask you something. Every day I feel incredibly run down and tired. And yet, I see you looking as fresh as a rose. I have to know: what's your secret?" "My secret? Every morning, without fail, I wake up at six o'clock sharp." "You wake up at six o'clock?" "Yes, and then I look at the clock, see what time it is, and go back to sleep for another four hours." ____________ Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One...men will screw anything. Q: What's 71? A: 69 with two spectators. ____________ British Poll The following question was asked in a recent poll: 'Are there too many immigrants in Britain?' 21% Said: Yes 17% Said: No 62% Said: ÚåÏ ÇáÃãä ÇáÚÇáãí ÈæÇÔäØ ____________ Wedding Nightmares http://tinyurl. If Dad Raised the Kids http://tinyurl. Hairy Little Singer http://tinyurl. Dirty Ol' Bastard http://buffalosjoke Have a nice day FROM: Martin aka the postman |
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