THE POSTMAN'S CORNER BE SURE TO SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS: They keep this page free for all who ask for it!  Congratulations! You have been chosen to receive a FREE Rachael Ray Chef Package! Take advantage of this unique offer and indulge yourself with Rachael Ray! http://www.thepostm FREE SAMPLE  Claim Your FREE* 3 Boxes of Stouffer's Frozen Dinners http://www.thepostm FREE SAMPLE  GIVE YOURSELF A BOOST in the morning or any time of the day with a quick & convenient Kellogg's NUTRIGRAIN Bar. This calcium enriched fruit cereal bar is great to grab on-the-go and you can get 16 right NOW in your favorite flavor for FREE*! To receive a sample shipped directly to your door, http://www.thepostm FREE SAMPLE  3-Pack FREE*! Choose your dog's favorite flavor: Give Your Dog Something to Drool Over! Be a true best friend and treat your dog to NEW MILK-BONE GRILLIN' BITES Chewy Dog Treats! Your chicken or bacon'n cheese loving dog will wag its tail for the chewy texture & mouth-watering flavor of Milk Bone Grillin' Bites. http://www.thepostm Lest some of you get the wrong impression, let me clarify a couple things. I talk often of the diet that "the war department" has me on. I am not really all that overweight, at 180 pounds and 5 foot 6. OK, maybe a few pounds, anyways. The diet exists mostly for my diabetes. Interestingly tho, if you count your carbs, like you should, you ultimately will also lose weight. And since the last couple months after my hospital stay, altogether I dropped over 20 pounds, so its paying off. The funny thing is, just before the hospital stay, I had bought my yearly supply of blue jeans, about 5 pairs this year. and when you lose 20 pounds, it means they don't fit so well no more. I have been after "the war department" to "take them in" so they quit falling down to my knees. Problem is, hemmin and sewin is one of her least favorite things to do. So she has been "putting it off". Finally, the other day, when we came out of ALdi's, I was loading groceries in the car. I couldn't hold my pants up and load groceries at the same time, and after the second bagful, my pants had dropped down to my ankles. You never saw a fat old man like me move so quickly... I reached down and hitched em back up again with lightning speed. And then peaked around to see if anyone had noticed my impromptu mooning of the parking lot. Fortunately, it was empty. "The war department" definitely got busy that night and now my new pants fit properly:) We do hope you enjoy today's issue! Cordially Martin aka the postman  THE COMICS confessions http://www.thepostm let me guess http://www.thepostm do you know http://www.thepostm someone died http://www.thepostm dad falls asleep http://www.thepostm forget my husband http://www.thepostm a form of amnesia http://www.thepostm pretty smart http://www.thepostm LETS GO TO THE MOVIES idiot with 4wd http://www.thepostm cheating on fathers day http://www.thepostm power point displays if you were a orphan http://www.thepostm maritime technology http://www.thepostm A beautiful, young lady about 21 went to a doctor and asked for a check-up. The doctor claimed that he had to use a thermometer for the check-up. So the doctor asked her, "Where shall I put the thermometer? The girl replied, "...uh ...not in my mouth, Doc. I might swallow it." "Okay...let' "Well, it might tickle me, Doc. How about my butt?" the girl queried. "Okay then," so he put the thing in the girls butt. Later, the girl while giggling exclaimed, "that's not my butt, Doc!" The doctor replied, "That's okay dear... it's not the thermometer, either." ____________ The blind date hadn't been all that great and Mary was relieved the evening was finally over. At her apartment door, her date suddenly said, "Hey! You wanna see my underwear?" Before she could respond, he had dropped his pants, right there in the hall, revealing that he wasn't wearing any underwear. She took one look and said, "Nice design. Does it also come in men's sizes?" ____________ A very drunken man gets on a city bus late one night, staggers up the aisle, and sits next to an elderly woman. She looks the man up and down and says, "I've got news for you - You're going straight to hell!" The man jumps up out of his seat and shouts, "Good heavens, I'm on the wrong bus!" ____________ A man was driving recklessly down the interstate one day and his girlfriend in the passenger seat was getting very upset.When the man finally realized that she was not happy with his driving and said, "Baby I'm sorry for driving so recklessly; I should be more careful when I have precious cargo!"The girlfriend looked at him and said, "Oh, that's so sweet baby!""Yeah, those golf clubs in the trunk cost a mint!" He is walking with a limp these days. And alone. ____________ As a stranger entered a little country store, he noticed a sign warning, "Danger! Beware of dog!" posted on the glass door. Inside, he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor beside the cash register. "Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?" he asked the owner. "Yep, that's him," came the reply. The stranger couldn't help but be amused. "That certainly doesn't look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?" "Because," the owner explained, "Before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him!" ============ Kiss Me Quick, Hurry Up http://tinyurl. PAPA THORN http://able2laff. Grateful http://able2laff. Almost always, actually http://able2laff. THAT'S ALL FOLKS Have a nice day FROM: Martin aka the postman |
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