THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing.
If you can fake that, you've got it made.
Groucho Marx (1890-1977)
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Today is an important day for Michigan politics.
It is the Michigan GOP primary. Politicis here in this
state is a little strange. Usually its a struggle between
East (Detroit and the dems) and West (Grand Rapids and the GOP ).
And usually its all about
who is going to control Lansing, the capitol. And the bottom
line is who controls Lansing is gonna get the big bux for road construction.
The roads are all falling apart in this state. And the folks
who live in the upper penninsula are pretty much ignored
because of the sparseness of population. Not too many folks
live up there, other than my buddy Buffalo Bill. The gop usually
fields a good candidate who is well known in West Michigan but is
essentially an unknown for the rest of the state, and we will
end up typically with a Democratic governor. IE: beloved J. Granholm.
bless her heart. I wonder. Given the sad economic position of
our state, how much will it really matter to people? As a primary
state, even dems can vote today. But you know what? I kinda think that
most people, instead of sending a message to the state capitol,
will go home tonight, pop open a beer, turn on the tube, and say
"Who gives a rats ass?"
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_________________
THE COMICS
life
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/j010.html
a little
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/j011.html
you can still get in your wedding dress!
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/j012.html
87 years old
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/j013.html
a pinch
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/j014.html
complaints
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/j015.html
dickhead
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/j016.html
coach
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/j018.html
3 weeks to live
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/j019.html
__________________
LET'S GO TO THE MOVIES!
THE GREAT RENEGER
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies100156.html
blondes wrestling
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies100157.html
shoes only
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies100158.html
wedding gag
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies100159.html
how I quit smoking
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies100160.html
_______________
POWER POINT DISPLAYS
job opportunity
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd296.html
you don't see this every day
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd297.html
Expo
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd298.html
My wooden leg was hurting me something fierce last night,"
complained Art, a Vietnam Vet.That's impossible," said his
neighbor, "How can a wooden leg hurt you?"The vet replied,
"My old lady hit me over the head with it when I came home late."
____________
An exhausted looking blond dragged himself in to the doctor's
office. "Doctor, there are dogs all over my neighborhood.
They bark all day and all night, and I can't get a wink of sleep."
"I have good news for you," the doctor answered, rummaging
through a drawer full of sample medications. "Here are some
new sleeping pills that work like a dream. A few of these
and your trouble will be over."
"Great," the blond answered, "I'll try anything. Let's give it a
shot."A few weeks later the blond returned, looking worse than ever.
"Doc, your plan is no good. I'm more tired than before!"
"I don't understand how that could be," said the doctor, shaking
his head. "Those are the strongest pills on the market!"
"That may be true," answered the blond wearily, "but I'm still
up all night chasing those dogs; and when I finally catch one,
it's hard getting him to swallow the pill!"
____________
A pissed-off wife was complaining about her husband spending
all his free time In a bar, so one night he took her along with
him. "What'll you have?" he asked. "Oh, I don't know. The same
as you I suppose," she replied. So, the husband Ordered a couple
of Jack Daniel's and threw his down in one shot. His wife
watched him, then took a sip from her glass and immediately spat
it Out. "Yuck, that's TERRIBLE!" she spluttered. "I don't know
how you can drink this stuff!" "Well, there you go," cried the
husband. "And you think I'm out enjoying Myself every night!"
____________
A young couple had just returned from their honeymoon and was settling
down in their new apartment.Coming home from work one night, the land
lady met the man in the hallway. She said, "I have a couple of extra
tickets to a play in town tonight, and I wonder if you and your bride
would like to have them?""I'll ask her," the young man responded. He
opened his door and called out, "Honey, would you like to see 'Oliver
Twist' tonight?""Hey, Pal," she retorted. "If you show me one more
trick with that thing, I'm going home to mother."
_____________
A fellow and his wife living in Houston, Texas, where the people
are all patriots, were blessed with the birth of twins, two
identical girls. These twins were born on the 4th of July, and
the father, being patriotic, said to his wife, "We will name them
Liberty and Justice, after the pledge of allegiance."
His wife said, "Are you nuts? You can't have girls going through
life with names like Liberty and Justice. We are going to name them
regular girl's names like Mary or Jane".
Well, the argument went on for about a month, when a compromise was
reached. They would each name one of the girls. The man chose Liberty
and the wife picked Elizabeth.
As the girls grew, they were so identical, they kept pulling tricks
on people who couldn't tell them apart. Finally, when they were about
18, a young man took interest in them. He would take one out on a date
but he was never sure which one he was with.
He decided he would marry at least one of them, but he was not sure
which one he would marry.
He went to the girls father and explained his quandary. "I love your
daughters and want to marry one of them, but I can't tell them apart,
so I will leave it up to you. Give me Liberty or give me Beth."
________________
A woman goes to her boyfriend's parents' house for Christmas dinner.
This is to be her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous.
They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal.
The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her
nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost
making her eyes water. Left with no other choice, she decides to
relieve herself a bit and lets out a dainty fart.
It wasn't loud, but everyone at the table heard the poof.
Before she even had a chance to be embarrassed, her boyfriend's
father looked over at the dog that had been snoozing under the
woman's chair, and said in a rather stern voice, 'Skippy!'.
The woman thought, 'This is great!' and a big smile came across her face.
A couple of minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again.
This time, she didn't even hesitate. She let a much louder and longer rrrrrip.
The father again looked at the dog and yelled, 'Skippy!'
Once again the woman smiled and thought 'Yes!' A few minutes later
the woman had to let another rip.. This time she didn't even think about it.
She let a fart rip that rivaled a train whistle blowing.
Once again, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled,
'Skippy, get away from her, before she shits on you!'
________________
A big heavy set housewife is on her hands and knees, scrubbing the
kitchen floor, when she suddenly yells to her husband, "Come here
quick, Mike! I'm paralyzed! I can't get up!"
He comes in, takes a look, and says, "Stand up, you silly old bat.
You're kneeling on one of your tits."
_____________
BUFFALO BILL
Love Bird
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jkjhiouoi.htm
Love Hurts
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jajka.htm
Megan True Love
http://www.buffaloschips.com/klkdl.htm
______________
FUN PAGES
3D Logic
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41660&s=n
Anna Kournikova Calendar Shoot
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=20492&s=n
Animal Hunting Game
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41511&s=n
Death by Football
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41377&s=n
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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