Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
From the Police and Fire section of the Sault News:
Erratic driving Sault Police were called out to the juncture of
Three Mile and Shunk Monday evening on reports of a vehicle
operating in an erratic fashion.
The driver had apparently gone into the ditch at one point, but was
back on the roadway when police arrived. He initially told police
he had swerved to avoid a squirrel before amending his statement
"No, wait... what's bigger than a squirrel?" Obviously under the
influence of something, police noted the man was unable to perform
verbal and/or alphabet tests during the interview. The man's
injured back prevented him from performing any of the balance tests.
Prescription medications had apparently been dispensed and while the
man was believed to be only taking the proper dosage, it left him
incapable of safely navigating the roadways. Police allowed the man
to contact someone to pick him and his vehicle up and did not make
an arrest in this incident.
The case has been forwarded to the Michigan Secretary of State for a
driver assessment re-examination.
I am glad they got the guy off the road and I wouldn't be surprised
to
find small animal identification on the next driver's test.
Eva has had a busy day today. She set up her Cars chair in front of
the
screen door and has been supervising the construction next door and
talking to the mailman, the UPS driver, the water dept. meter crew
and
various friends that stopped by. I have a feeling the water dept
guys will
be back tomorrow or when they fid out they left the roll of wire
they had
here.
Hope you enjoy the chips..... buffalo
A newsletter you may enjoy
"MUSICAL MAGIC"
is all about sharing Music of all Genre!!!
Everyone is welcome to post their favorite Singer, Song, Midi, Music
Clip.
This is a SHARING GROUP
Share YOUR MUSIC and you can share other members music.
ALSO request Music
NON SHARERS WILL BE REMOVED.
YAHOO DOES NOT STORE ATTACHMENTS SO YOU MUST HAVE YOUR SETTINGS ON
INDIVIDUAL MAIL
AS YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO GO TO THE GROUP WEBSITE TO RETRIEVE
SOMETHING YOU MAY HAVE WANTED
Remember to complete your Yahoo ID/Profile please!!!!
If the yahoo ID is not completed then you will be removed. SORRY, NO
Grouply Addys Permitted!!!!
Visit group on web at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/MusicalMagic
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Stormy Chips
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A young man is being pursued by a young admiring woman. Eventually,
he has no choice but to grant her a private audience.
Relentlessly she asks him for a quickie in the sack though he tried
hard to refuise her. Finally giving in to her demands for carnal
knowledge, he says "Ok, but there is one condition: I have a
particular fetish that you must perform in order to sleep with me."
"I'll do anything for you" replies the succubus. "Just name it."
So the man says to the woman, "You know ... I really enjoy it when
there's a sort of lightning effect. So you must reach over to that
switch on the wall and flick it on and off every few seconds."
The woman agrees and starts flicking the light switch off with her
left arm. She then asks "Now can I fuck you?"
"Not quite yet" replies the man. "Lightning is nice, but it doesn't
really mean much without thunder. So with your right leg, I want
you to open and close the cabinet door whenever you flick the light
on."
"Ok" says the horny young maid, and she begins to coordinate her
flicks and clacks. "Now can I fuck you?" she asks as she is
switching between arm and leg movements.
"Not quite yet" replies the man. "This is all very nice, but there
can't really be thunder and lightning without wind. I'd like you to
reach behind your head with your right hand and open and shut the
windows."
She says "Ok" and begins opening the shutter and closing it with her
right hand. And of course, it's raining and some drops are coming
in the window.
So there she is, making lightning with her left hand, creating
thunder with her right leg, and using her right hand to make wind
and rain.
Desperate and beyond understanding of his fetish, the young woman
finally begs him "NOW can we fuck? PLEASE?!"
And the young man looks at her shocked and says, "What do you mean
'have sex'? In this weather?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Customs Chips
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A guy traveling through Mexico on vacation lost his wallet and all
of his identification. Cutting his trip short, he attempted to make
his way home but was stopped by the U.S. Customs Agent at the
border.
"May I see your identification, please?" asked the agent.
"I'm sorry, but I lost my wallet," replied the guy.
"Sure buddy, I hear that every day. No ID, no entry," said the
agent.
"But I can prove I'm an American!" he exclaimed. "I have a picture
of Ronald Reagan tattooed on one side of my butt and George Bush on
the other."
"This I gotta see," replied the agent.
With that, the guy dropped his pants and showed the agent his
behind.
"By golly, you're right!" exclaimed the agent. "Have a safe trip
back to Chicago ."
"Thanks!" he said. "But how did you know I was from Chicago?"
The agent replied, "I recognized Obama in the middle."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Viagra Chips
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A man suffering from impotence went to see a specialist.
The doctor gave him a prescription that he was to take faithfully
three times a day, and always with food.
Two days later the man was at a formal banquet and didn't want any
of the other guests to spot and possibly identify his pink and
purple capsule medication. So he instructed the waiter to empty the
capsule into his soup, thinking he could eat his soup openly with
everyone else, take his medication, and preserve his privacy all at
the same time.
However, when the soup was served everyone received a bowl of it but
the man, who began feeling conspicuous and angry. He confronted the
waiter and asked why he hadn't been served his "special" soup.
"Well, sir, I poured your medication into your bowl as instructed.
Since then, I have been waiting for the noodles to lie down."
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Ugly Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You're so ugly, when you walk into the bank
they turn off the cameras.
If ugliness were bricks, you would be the
Great Wall Of China.
You're so ugly, you went to a haunted house
and came out with an application.
If ugliness was a crime, you'd get the
electric chair.
You were so ugly at birth, your parents
named you Shit Happens.
You're so ugly, your mate won't have to
worry about birth control...your face
will do just fine.
You're so ugly, you could model for death
threats.
You're so ugly, when you were born they
put tinted windows on your incubator.
You're so ugly, you have to sneak up on
your mirror.
You're so ugly, when you look in the mirror
your reflection turns to stone.
You're so ugly, when you sit in the sand
the cats try to bury you.
You're so ugly, your doctor is a vet.
You're so ugly, when you were born the
doctor took one look at you and slapped
your parents.
You're so ugly, you stuck your head out of
the car window and got arrested for
mooning.
You're so ugly, your pet name is Scooby-Doo.
Your girl is so ugly, you gave her a hickey
and got a mouthful of fur.
You're so ugly, you have to Trick or Treat
by phone.
You're so ugly, when your mother went into
labour your father went into shock.
You're so ugly, everytime your mother looks
at you she says to herself, "Damn, I should've
just given head."
I know why you look like a horse, because I
saw your mother grazing in the field.
You're so ugly, when we play peek-a-boo
- first I peeked, then I booed.
You're so ugly, you can sink your face in
dough and make monster cookies.
You're so ugly, they call you Taco Bell,
when people see you they run for the border.
You're so ugly, you make onions cry.
You're so ugly, the tide wouldn't bring you in.
You're so ugly, I took you to see the zookeeper
and he said, "Thanks for bringing him back."
You're so ugly, you mother had to get drunk
before she breast fed you.
You're so ugly, you went to a freak show and
got a permanent job.
You're so ugly, the police sketch artists are
afraid to draw you.
You're so ugly, when you get sick they call
the vet.
You're so ugly, you make blind kids cry.
You're so ugly, farmers use your picture as
a scarecrow.
You're so ugly, everytime you go out you get
chased by the dog catcher.
You're so ugly, when you jerk off your hand
tries to fall asleep.
You're so ugly, you can't hail a bus.
You're so ugly, they call you Moses because
every time you step in the lake, the water
parts.
You're so ugly, you give Freddy Kruegger
nightmares.
You're so ugly, they let you park in
handicapped spaces.
You're so ugly, when you threw a boomerang
it didn't come back.
You're so ugly, when you went to the zoo
they refused to let you out.
You're so ugly, you can't get a date off
the calendar.
You're so ugly, when your mother went into
labour the doctors went on strike.
You're so ugly, your last name is Link and
your first is Missing.
You're so ugly, people put your picture in
their car window as an anti-theft device.
You're so ugly, that you can turn milk into
yogurt, just by looking at it.
You're so ugly, people create a Jackson
Pollock style painting when they spew on
the floor.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A fellow in a bar notices a woman, always alone, come in on a fairly
regular basis. After the second week, he made his move. "No thank
you."
she said politely. "This may sound rather odd in this day and age,
but I'm keeping myself pure until I meet the man I love." "That must
be rather difficult." the man replied. "Oh, I don't mind too much."
she said. "But, it has my husband pretty upset."
It was the first day of school, and the teacher was calling the
roll. She came to a strange name. The boy's name was I P.P.
Rainwater. She called it out. When the youngster stood up, the
teacher demanded he tell her his real name, or leave her class.
As he was leaving, he looked over at his younger brother and said,
"Come on Shithead. She won't believe you either."
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LynnLynn's Links
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If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com
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Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Once Upon A Time
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/Misc_files/Ch.html
Marlene/How Can You Refuse Jesus Now
http://summerhoosier.250free.com/Html/HowCanYouRefuseJesusNow.html
My Front Porch
http://www.reflectionsofsouthbreeze.com/Pages/MyFrontPorch.htm
John/I Fall to Pieces
http://heavens-gates.com/patsy/ifalltopieces
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Surfin Surfari
22 Awesome Papercraft Weapons Via Dianne
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Creation Museum
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/creationmuseum.html
TED STEVENS KILLED IN PLANE CRASH
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Clean and Green Via Wesley
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Okay, everyone is telling me that I'm an insane millionaire who must
have gone absolutely crazy for doing this today and tomorrow,
especially on Thankgiving of all days, but I don't care anymore
because I think it's just the right thing to do.
Okay, let me catch my breathe while I type this because you're not
going to believe this...First off, thank you so much for taking a
minute to read this, my name is Justin Blake, and I'm a millionaire
that was dared to do something insane tonight and tomorrow morning,
and if you're interested in knowing what it is then read below, but
you'll need to hurry because you may only have a few minutes to take
advantage of this:
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morning.....so you need to get your copy today if you want one.
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
What Is SVCHOST. EXE
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Invention Facts and Myths
http://www.ideafinder.com/history/of_inventions.htm
Red X
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CSS CHEAT SHEET Via Wesley
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Listen, you will have no one but yourself to blame if you don't go
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Animal World
Doggie Zone
Koalas In A Heatwave 2
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Movie Links
Only Want Sex
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Pool
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Sensitivity Training
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Sexy Hair Dressing Gown
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Shitty Day At The Gym
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Best Wave Ever
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Better Than A Beer Commercial
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Blobbin
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The Elevator
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Bud Light BBQ
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Light Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sandy and John were an extremely liberal, though not especially
bright, white couple. Wanting to begin a family, they decided they
wanted to have a black baby, and set to work.
Nine months later, the fruits of their labor was born: a lovely
white girl.
Pleased but disappointed, John decided to ask a black man at work
why
they hadn't parented a black baby.
Realizing that John was somewhat sluggish, the fellow took him aside
and asked, "Is your wanker at least a foot long?"
John had to admit that it was not. "And is it at least four inches
Once more John replied in the negative. "Well, man, there's your
problem!" the guy slapped him on the back. "You let in too much
light!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
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bull2
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bullshit bingo
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bunnies censors
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bunny sex
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Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A bather whose clothing was strewed,
By winds that left her quite nude,
Saw a man come along,
And unless we are wrong,
You expected this line to be lewd.
__________________________
There was a young lass from Australia
Who painted her ass like a Dahlia
The shape it was fine
And the color devine
But the aroma--well, that was a faihlia
__________________________
There was a young lady named Kite
Whose speed was much faster than light.
She left home one day
In a relative way
And returned on the previous night.
<Snagged by>
Ross
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Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
An elderly couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with
each other for quite a long time. Urged on by their friends, they
decided it was finally time to get married.
Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long
conversation regarding how their marriage might work. They discussed
finances, living arrangements and so on.
Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject
of their physical relationship. 'How do you feel about Sex?' he
asked, rather tentatively.
'I would like it infrequently' she replied.
The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, adjusted his glasses,
then leaned over towards her and whispered; 'Is that one word or
two?'
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Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn Vol 1853
Argonia
Rudy: So what was that town we just drove through again Pops?
BJ: Argonia, Kansas. It is famous for a couple of things.
Katie: Let me guess, a movie, Jason and the Argonianaunts?
BJ: No, it was the first town to elect a female mayor back in 1887.
Diana: That was before women could vote so it's a big deal.
Sandi: You said a couple of big things.
BJ: The other thing is they have a rocket club. Every year they
have a launch party and launch rockets that go pretty far into the
sky.
Val: You don't say.
BJ: It is true. We will come to the next one.
The herd
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
To unsubscribe send a blank e-mail to Buffalos-adult-jokes-unsubscribe@egroups.com
Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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