Adult Adult
Just going to say a quick hello today. Got an appointment with a
nutritionist in an hour or so that I have to get ready for. Buffy
and my nephew Frankie are over at Buffy's packing up another
load for the storage building but the move has been going slowly
because of cold weather but it is like Phoenix outside today. I
hear they had 27 deg. this morning while we are at 25 deg.right now.
Vista users, have you seen the Black Screen of Death yet ? It is
not very funny when you boot up and you have no desktop
or taskbar, just a black screen. I am running it right now but
you have to start explorer in task manager to get it to start.
Repair involves a regedit which I am working myself up for
and if that don't work I will be saving my pennies for a copy
of Windows 7 for this computer.
Enjoy the chips and I am not supporting either team at the
Superbowl, just want to see a good game..... buffalo
A newsletter you may enjoy
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Oreos Chips
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Why Oreos Are Better Than Men
(compiled by little Keebler elves)
10. They don't scream if you twist them too hard.
9. They don't get drunk and throw up in your bed.
8. They are always good.
7. They go away when you want them too.
6. Rather have chocolate in your teeth than hair.
5. Don't have to worry about the last person who ate one.
4. It's always fun to swallow.
3. They never talk.
2. When it makes a mess in your bed, it's easy to clean.
And the # 1 reason is....
1.The creamy white stuff tastes good.
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Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
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Short Chips
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'WHERE Is My SUNDAY Paper?' The irate customer calling the newspaper
office loudly demanded, wanting to know where her Sunday edition
was.
'Ma'am,' said the newspaper employee, 'today is Saturday ... The
Sunday paper is not delivered until tomorrow, on Sunday.'
There was quite a long pause on the other end of the phone, followed
by a Ray of recognition.... As she was heard to mutter 'Well, shit
... So that's why no one was at church today
A woman goes to her doctor, complaining that her husband is 300%
impotent.
The doctor says, "I'm not sure I understand what you mean."
She says, "Well, the first 100% you can guess. In add- ition, he
burned his tongue and broke his finger."
The blonde police officer was escorting a prisoner to jail when the
officer's hat blew off. "Shall I run and get it for you?" asked the
prisoner obligingly.
"You must think I'm stupid," said the officer. "You stay here and
I'll get it."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Marine Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was 5 o'clock in the morning at the U.S. Marine boot camp, well
below freezing, and the soldiers were asleep in their barracks.
The drill sergeant walked in and bellowed, "This is a birthday suit
inspection! I wanna see you all formed up outside and butt naked
now!"
The soldiers quickly jumped out of bed, Naked and shivering, and ran
outside to form up in their three ranks.
The sergeant walked out and yelled, "Close up the ranks and conserve
your body heat!"
The soldiers complied and moved closer together.
The captain appeared with his swagger stick. He walked up to the
first soldier and whacked Him right across the chest.
"Did that hurt?" he yelled.
"No, Sir!"
"Why not?"
"Because I'm a U.S. Marine, Sir!"
The captain then walked up to the next soldier and whacked him right
across the chest.
"Did that hurt?" he yelled.
"No, Sir!"
"Why not?" "Because I'm a U.S. Marine, Sir!"
The captain was rather impressed with the toughness of the soldiers;
so he walked up to a third soldier. The captain noticed that the
soldier had an enormous Erection, so naturally he gave his target a
huge whack With the swagger stick.
"Did that hurt?" he yelled.
"No, Sir!"
"Why not?"
"Because it belongs to the guy behind me, Sir!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Dog Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My Dog
* My dog sleeps about 20 hours a day.
* He has his food prepared for him and he can eat whenever he wants,
24/7/365.
* His meals are provided at no cost to him.
* He visits the Dr. once a year for his checkup,
booster shots and again during the year if any
medical needs arise. For this he pays nothing,
and nothing is required of him.
* He lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that
is much larger than he needs, but he is not
required to do any upkeep.
* If he makes a mess, someone else cleans it up.
* He has his choice of luxurious places to sleep
and he receives these accommodations absolutely
free.
* He is living like a king, and has absolutely no expenses
whatsoever.
* All of his costs are picked up by others who go
out and earn a living every day.
I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly
it hit me like a brick in the head... Holy Shit,
my dog is a Democrat!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Random Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two women were sitting together sharing their morning coffee. Sarah
said to Marge, "Living with my husband is like playing checkers."
"How so?" asks Marge. "Every time I make a move, he jumps me."
A concerned patient asked the doctor if masturbation is harmful.
"Not usually," answered the doctor. "Not unless you do it too
often." "How about three times a day?" the patient asked. "That
seems a little excessive. Why don't you get a girlfriend?" "Oh, I
already have a girlfriend," the patient replied. "I mean a girl you
can live with and have sex with?" asked the doctor. The patient
said, "I've got one just like that!" So the doctor asked, "Then why
do you masturbate three times a day?" "Because, she won't have sex
during mealtimes!"
The ideal man is like a beluga whale. He has a four-foot tongue and
can breathe out of a hole in the top of his head.
A lady enters the dental surgery, takes off her stockings,
underwear, makes herself comfortable in the chair, spreads her legs
apart. Dentist: "Madam, are you sure you're in the right place?
Probably, you need the gynecologist." Lady: "No. I'm in the right
place alright. You made the dental plate for my husband last week,
didn't you? Now remove it, please."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com
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Subscribers and Friends
Melva w/Like the Wind
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/Misc_files/Wi.html
Carolyn w/ Your'e Sixteen ~ Johnny Burnette
http://carolynspreciousmemories.com/50s/youresixteen.html
Want-A-Be
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/poems/want.html
What Is Love 1?
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wlove2.html
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Hello,
We wanted to inform you today that you can now download a program
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the world right on your PC!
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Surfin Surfari
What's That Bug? Insect identification
http://www.whatsthatbug.com/
USA Lottery, State Lotteries
http://www.officialusa.com/stateguides/lottery/index.html
A Walk Through Time
http://www.physics.nist.gov/GenInt/Time/time.html
Stints - just plain crazy!
http://tinyurl.com/34vd8ww
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We would like to show you why you may be "fat" and why you're unable
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Bruce's Place
http://www.wtv-zone.com/Joker/index.html
How to Disappear from Facebook and Twitter Via Wesley
http://tinyurl.com/y89kftf
Valentine Animations:
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/agifs_u-z.html
Heart Animations
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/agifs_f-j.html
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We would like to know if you would be interested in working from
home in your spare time writing short articles for us. You will be
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We will also pay you $12.00 - $50.00 per hour for posing in blogs,
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Freelance Home Writers Network
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Movie Links
Benny Hill Wishing Well
http://www.buffaloschips.com/9201.htm
Be Quiet
http://www.buffaloschips.com/9202.htm
Best Casino Ad Ever
http://www.buffaloschips.com/9203.htm
Best First Dance At A Wedding
http://www.buffaloschips.com/9204.htm
Best Video Of The Year
http://www.buffaloschips.com/9206.htm
CCR Lorraine
http://www.buffaloschips.com/1236.htm
Cell Phone
http://www.buffaloschips.com/1237.htm
Chick Em
http://www.buffaloschips.com/1238.htm
Child Proof Drawer
http://www.buffaloschips.com/1239.htm
Children Fire Alarms
http://www.buffaloschips.com/12310.htm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Random Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"The Clintons released their tax returns. Over the past eight
years, they have donated over $10 million to charity. When
they asked Bill Clinton why he gave so much money to charity,
he said, 'She's a really good dancer.'"
"They still haven't revealed the contents of that note Bush
left for Barack Obama, but I have it: 'dear Brak, I took
Clinton's porn.'"
A few years ago, the Sierra Club and the United States
Forest Service were presenting an alternative to Wyoming
ranchers for controlling the coyote population.
It seemed that, after years of the ranchers using the tried
and true methods of shooting and/or trapping the predators,
the tree-huggers had a "more humane" solution. What they
proposed was for the animals to be captured alive, the males
castrated, then let loose again...and thus the population
would be controlled. This was ACTUALLY proposed to the
Wyoming Wool and Sheep Grower's association by Sierra Club
and USFS.
Well, all the ranchers thought about this amazing idea for
a couple of minutes. Finally, an old boy in the back stood
up, kicked his hat back and said, "Son, I don't think you
understand the problem." These coyotes ain't F$#^in' our
sheep....they're eatin' 'em."
A woman goes into a sporting goods store to buy a rifle. "It's for
my husband," she tells the clerk.
"Did he tell you what gauge to get?" asked the clerk.
"Are you kidding?" she says. "He doesn't even know that I'm going to
shoot him!"
Q. Why did the blonde keep failing her driver's test?
A. Because every time the door opened, she got into the back seat.
Did you hear about the new douche they've made for women?
It's made of Marijuana, Arid Deodorant, and Kentucky Fried Chicken.
It leaves you high, dry, and finger licking good!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ride a Fat Boy
http://www.buffaloschips.com/42513.htm
Bum Fuck Egypt
http://www.buffaloschips.com/42514.htm
Good Spanking
http://www.buffaloschips.com/42515.htm
No screwing in public restrooms
http://www.buffaloschips.com/42516.htm
Work For head
http://www.buffaloschips.com/42517.htm
Wicked Picture
http://www.buffaloschips.com/42518.htm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I love ORGANS," she said, "Even kidney.
I've had sweetbreads from Brisbane to Sidney
A good serving of liver
Will set me aquiver,
Just like Tom and his organ: Well, didn' he?"
"There are giblets that go in a stew,
And chittlin's appeal to a few
You can start with some heart
And end up with the part
That's best shared just between me and you."
"The stores will no longer sell lung,
nor cojones from a bull that's well-hung;
And there isn't much hype
About kidney or tripe,
But I truly ADORE some good tongue!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Reference this joke:
My sister is a flat chested girl.
I'm quite a joker, and one day I said to her "Would you
wear gloves if you had no hands??"
She said "No".
So I said "So why do you wear a bra then??"
At this point I thought it advisable to run away, before
she threw something at me.
The last line usually is: "For the same reason you wear a jock
strap! "
Rob
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn Vol 1973
Joy. (as defined by Sandi)
Daddy and Mommy were gone for more than nine suns.
I was very lonely. I missed my daddy. I cried a lot for him.
Then one day he was home! Oh to express my Joy! I ran in circles,
large circles around him as fast as I could run. Daddy told me the
circles were about 100 feet across and I ran so fast I was leaning
almost at a forty five degree angle towards the inside of the
circle.
(Daddy was in the middle of the circle). I had no words to show my
Joy. When I ran my joy down, then we hugged a long time and we went
inside and I sat next to him. I love my daddy and he loves me..
The herd
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult
*********************************************
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
To unsubscribe send a blank e-mail to Buffalos-adult-jokes-unsubscribe@egroups.com
Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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