THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
This is my least favorite time of the year.
Days are short, temps are cold and it just
plain sux. I was pleasantly surprised tho,
yesterday afternoon I went in the living room
to discover that the sun was shining through the
windows. Haven't seen that in a while, and Turk
the dog aka Carlos the rat was taking full advantage
of it. sunning himself and trying to eat the re-
flective colors that the stained glass leaves on
the carpet.
The city is still digging out after Tuesday's big
blowout blizzard. Was not a record altho they say
we tied for the blizzard of '78. The snow crews around
here have been running in circles trying to get
things cleaned up.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_________________
THE COMICS
at the drive thru
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/b026.html
a green america
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/b027.html
surgery
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/b028.html
this movie
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/b029.html
worlds greatest dad
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/b030.html
______________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
expensive bottle opener
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/787.html
newsnight
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/788.html
boobies!
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/789.html
____________
POWER POINT DISPLAYS
hi cotton
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd597.html
vacuum sealed
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd598.html
A Ukrainian and a Newfoundland wrestler were set to
square off for the Olympic Gold medal. Before the
final match, the Newfie wrestler's trainer came to him
and said, "Now, don't forget all the research we've
done on this Ukie. He's never lost a match, because of
this pretzel hold he has. So, whatever you do, do not
let him get you in that hold!! If he does, you're finished !!"
The Newfie nodded in acknowledgment........
As the match started, the Newfie and the Ukrainian
circled each other several times, looking for an opening.
All of a sudden, the Ukie lunged forward,.........
grabbing the Newfie and wrapping him up in the dreaded
pretzel hold. A sigh of disappointment arose from the
crowd and the trainer buried his face in his hands,
for he knew all was lost.
He couldn't bare to watch the inevitable happen.....
Suddenly, there was a scream, then a cheer from the
crowd and the trainer raised his eyes just in time to
watch the Ukrainian go flying up in the air.
His back hit the mat with a thud and the Newfoundlander
collapsed on top of him, making the pin and winning the match.
The trainer was astounded !!..........
When he finally got his wrestler alone, he asked:
"How the hell did you ever get out of that hold?? No
one has ever done it before!!...." The wrestler answered:
"Well, I was ready to give up when he got me in that hold
but at the last moment, I opened my eyes and saw this pair
of testicles, right in front of my face. I had nothing to
lose, so with my last ounce of strength I stretched out
my neck and bit those babies just as hard as I could !!"
The trainer exclaimed:
"So, THAT'S what finished him off !!...."
"Not really"............. replied the Newfie.......
"You'd be amazed how strong you get, when you bite your own nuts !!"...
________________
Moanin' Mike is sitting in his local bar with his buddies, sharing a beer
and bragging about his sex life. Moanin' says, I have great sex with my
wife. She's very vocal, she can really rattle the windows, and most of
it really turns me on. I love it when she screams, 'Harder!' I love it
when she screams, 'Faster!'
"Man, you lucky dog! Says his one buddy. But come on and tell the truth,
isn't there sometimes a problem with your sex life?"
"The only problem I have" Moanin' said dejectedly, "Is when she screams,
'Deeper!'"
______________
A man was driving through Wyoming one spring evening. The road was
deserted and he had not seen a soul for what seemed like hours.
Suddenly his engine started to cough and sputter and then died,
leaving him sitting by the road in total silence.
He popped the hood and looked to see if there was anything that he
could do to get it going again.
Unfortunately, he had a limited knowledge of cars, so all he could
do was look at the engine, in total disgust.
As he looked at the engine by the gradually fading light of his
flashlight, he cursed that he had not put in new batteries.
Suddenly, through the shadows, came a deep voice, "It's your fuel
pump."The man jumped when he heard the voice, causing him to hit his head
on the underside of the hood. "Who said that?" he demanded.
As he looked out into the moon lit night, he saw two horses standing
in the field alongside the road. The man was amazed when the nearest
of the two horses repeated, "It's your fuel pump; tap it with your
flashlight, and try it again."
Still dazed from bumping his head, the man tapped the fuel pump with
his flashlight, and then got into the car, turned the key and sure
enough, the engine roared to life.
He muttered a short thanks to the horse and then sped away in his
car.When he reached the next town, he ran into the local bar. "Large
whiskey, please!" he said.A rancher sitting at the bar looked
at the man's ashen face and
asked, "What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost!"
"It's unbelievable," the man said, as he started telling the rancher
what had just happened to him down the road.
The rancher took a sip of his beer, as he looked thoughtfully at the
man. "A horse, you say? Was it by any chance a white horse?"
The man replied, "Yes it was! Do you think I'm crazy?"
"No, you ain't crazy. In fact, you're lucky," said the
rancher. "Because I happen to know the black horse down there don't
know diddly about cars."
______________
BUFFALO BILL
Best Video Of The Year
http://www.buffaloschips.com/9206.htm
CCR Lorraine
http://www.buffaloschips.com/1236.htm
Cell Phone
http://www.buffaloschips.com/1237.htm
____________
FUN PAGES
Glowing Urine
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=42228&s=n
Rhyme Time
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=42232&s=n
Killer Elephant
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=39823&s=n
Beatles Autographs
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=42358&s=n
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
______________________________
__._,_.___
No comments:
Post a Comment