Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
It was 45 degrees yesterday and there are puddles everywhere.
I went out to pay the phone bill and get soda and had the windows
rolled down enjoying the sun. I tore this place apart for two days
trying to find the phone bill which was due on Fri. and finally I
called the ATT authorized agent up here and all they needed
was my account number. Now I have to find the bill for the natural
gas and I'll be done for the month and pretty much poor till next
month, but we all know how that goes. I do seem to pay for the
internet and cable before anything else, you have to have priorities
you know.
When I got home it was about time for school to get out so I
had Buffy open the front windows so Eva could talk to the kids
as they walked by and also let some air in and winter out. I am
surprised none of the cats made an escape attempt because
with the porch warm and dry they like to go out and soak up
some sun.
Speaking of cats I was napping and Dini hopped up on the bed
and I opened my eyes to see what she was up to because
they seem to love to shove their butt in your face and take a nap.
This time when I woke up her nose was about two inches in front
of mine and she was looking up and down slowly. It was then
I realized I had just been cat-scanned.
Enjoy the chips... buffalo
Friends Luvin' Each Other
We are a group of online friends who have come together to enjoy each
other's company. We offer nonjudgmental support, help and advice where
we can share laughter and tears, appreciate each other for who we are
and just take pleasure in our time together. We post freebies, poetry
stories, jokes, graphics and whatever else strikes our fancies and we
have some pretty interesting conversations too.
We come from all walks of life and several generations!
Please join us and let's be friends!
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Trucking Chips
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A Roadway driver is driving east on Route 66 he sees a truck driving
west and the CB crackles to life ." Hey Roadway driver who's the two
biggest faggots in America?" comes from the CB.
The Roadway driver replies . "I don't know".
The other trucker says " You and your brother ".
Well the Roadway driver gets all pissed off but the other driver
tells him "Its just a joke tell it to the next truck you see."
Well the Roadway driver drives for about an hour and finally sees
another truck. He gets on the CB and says " Hey, other truck do you
know who the two biggest fags in the world are?"
The other trucker says " I don't know, who?"
The Roadway driver replies " Me and my brother"
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Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
facebook
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giving thanks
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you forgot, doctor
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Valentine Chips
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Little Melissa comes home from 1st grade & tells her father that
they learned about the history of Valentine's Day.
*'Since Valentine's Day is for a Christian saint, and we're Jewish,'
she asks, 'Will God get mad at me for giving someone a valentine? *
*Melissa's father thinks a bit, then says: 'No, I don't think God
would get mad. Whom do you want to give a Valentine to?' *
*'Osama Bin Laden,' she says.*
*'Why Osama Bin Laden?' her father asks in shock.* *Well,' she says,
'I thought that if a little American Jewish girl could have enough
love to give Osama a Valentine, he might start to think that maybe
we're not all bad, and maybe start loving people a little bit. *
*And if other kids saw what I did and sent Valentines to Osama, he'd
love everyone a lot. And then he'd start going all over the place
to tell everyone how much he loved them, and how he didn't hate
anyone anymore.' *
*Her father's heart swells and he looks at his daughter with new
found pride. 'Melissa, that's the most wonderful thing I have ever
heard.'*
*'I know, ' Melissa says, 'and once that gets him out in the open,
the Marines could shoot the fucker.'*
buff says I just like this joke
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Heart Chips
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A 19 year old lad has been dating a 17 year old girl for a few
months.
They've been to the pictures and return to her home where she lives
with her father, mother having passed on several years previously.
They settle down to amuse themselves on the sofa in the sitting
room, whilst the old man watches telly in the back room.
Now the girl is a good example, and looks after her Dad: she in turn
is the apple of his eye. So naturally, he's worried sick about her
well being and eventually just has to break off from watching
Panorama to knock gently on the living room door.
The girl opens it.
"Hi Sue, you couldn't make me a cup of tea, could you?"
"Course I can Dad," she replies, and trots off into the kitchen to
put the kettle on.
Meanwhile, the old man sits down on the sofa with the lad to have a
word.
"Look, son," he says. "I remember when I was your age, pulling the
birds and trying my luck. Thing is, I'm worried about our Sue."
"Why, what's up with her?" replies the lad.
"Well, I shouldn't really tell you, but she's got acute angina."
"Oh, I know..." says the lad. "... great pair of tits too!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Random Chips
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?
Prostitution is a hole sale business.
?
As long as I have a face you'll always have a place to sit.
?
How is music like your sex life? Three-quarter is swing time,
one-quarter is ragtime.
?
Mother: What seems to be the problem with you? You have been married
three years and still no children. I had hopes of being a grandmother by
now. Daughter: I just don't know, Mom! Billy tries all the time,
it's just that I have a lot of trouble swallowing.
?
If you have sex with your own clone, are you gay or are you
masturbating?
?
A man was lying naked, face down on a table, with his wife rubbing his
back with toilet paper. "Augh, I hate it when you treat me like shit."
?
When the guys laugh at me for volunteering at the women's mental health
clinic I just shrug it off. But when they tell me I'm fuckin' nuts, I
have to smile, because then I know they understand.
?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Sperm Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A mom of an 8-year-old boy was awaiting her son's arrival from
school. As he ran in, he said he needed to talk to her about making
babies. He claimed he knew about the development of a fetus but didn't
understand the answer to that "million dollar question." Namely, how did
the sperm get into the woman? The mom asked the boy what he thought the
answer was. The boy said that the sperm is manufactured in the man's
stomach, it rises up to his chest, then throat, and into his mouth
whereupon he kisses the woman and deposits the sperm into her mouth.
The mom told her boy that that was a good guess, but wrong. She said
that she would give him a hint... that the sperm came out of the man's
penis. Suddenly, the boy's face became quite red and he said, "YOU MEAN
YOU PUT YOUR MOUTH ON THAT THING!?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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LynnLynn's Links
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If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com
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Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Fried Chicken ~ Virginia Style
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/Misc_files/B/J_C_W.html
carolyn w/ Tell Me Why ~ Elvis
http://carolynspreciousmemories.com/elvis/tellmewhy.html
Want-A-Be
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/poems/want.html
The Bible
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/thebible.html
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Surfin Surfari
Ocean Over Time Via Dianne
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Energy Cost Calculator
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Natural Insect Control via Peggy
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Internet Explorer 9 & 8 Download Website
http://windows.microsoft.com/en-US/windows/downloads/internet-explorer
Useful online calculators
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Codes 4 You
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Animal World
Bucky And The Beagle
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/visitor.html
Story Of LuLu
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Movie Links
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Niggar Family
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Nissan Pathfinder
http://www.buffaloschips.com/azsdxs.htm
Not a morning person
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Not Just A Human Problem
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Both Ways Barack
http://www.buffaloschips.com/012108.htm
Bowl
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Boxing Match
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Brownies
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Camera 21
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Penance Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As soon as she had finished parochial school in Memphis, a bright
young, lass named Becky shook the dust of the convent scholl off her
shoes and made her way to Las Vegas where before long, she became a
head-liner dancer in a casino show.
Eventually she returned to her home town for a visit and on a
Saturday night went to confession in the church which she had always
attended as a child.
In the confessional Father Sullivan recognized her and began asking
her about her work. She explained that she was an acrobatic dancer,
and he wanted to know what that meant.
She said she would be happy to show him the kind of thing she did on
stage. Stepped out of the confessional within sight of Father Sul
livan, she went into a series of cartwheels, leaping splits,
handsprings and back flips.
Kneeling near the confessional, waiting their turn, were two middle-
aged ladies. They witnessed Becky's acrobatics with wide eyes, and
one said to the other: "Will you just look at the penance Father
Sullivan is givin' out this night, and me without me bloomers on!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
blonde bull
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blonde upside
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blonde Washing
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Limerick Chips
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Oh, the bird is dead, 'Cause he bashed his head,
On the window by the kitchen.
Now he ain't flappin',
He ain't flyin',
He ain't even twitchin'.
____________________________________________
There was a young lady from Maine
Who claimed she had men on her brain.
But you knew from the view,
As her abdomen grew,
It was not on her brain that he'd lain.
____________________________________________
There was a young lady from Cheam
Who tried out a breast-growing cream
She awoke in the night
With a terrible fright
Another had grown in between!
<Snagged by>
Ross
The lady said she was fresh out of dough
And for that she was quite a bit forlorn
Cuz coming very soon was Xmas morn
So she decided to put away her halo
And made me a present of her hot libido
*************************************
No problem to get her clothes a peeling....
But complained she felt no sexual feeling
So had her douche a bit with blue Lavoris
And being a gent I just tickled her clitoris
And had to pry her off a fan in the ceiling
*************************************
Young Barb was intrigued with romance..
One night she decided to take a chance..
And went dancin' and imbibing on the go
Till she ended up with that special glow
And soon her younger sisters were aunts
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A guy walks into a pub and grabs a seat at the bar.
It's kinda' busy, so the bartender comes by and ask "What can I get
for you?"
The patron replies, "Whiskey!"
The bartender sets him up and keeps on working.
He slams down the shot and puts the glass down.
The bartender comes back and says, "That'll be $4.25."
"Oh NO!" replies the man. "You ask me what I wanted, I told you and
you GAVE it to me. You said nothing about cost!"
The bartender steps back in surprise and looks down the bar at the
other customers.
"He's right," explains one gentleman. "I'm a lawyer and he's got
every right to refuse to pay under those circumstances!"
Furious, the bartender says, "Get the hell outta' my bar!!"
He leaves and the bartender takes the glass off the bar.
As he turns back around to wipe off the counter, he is amazed to see
this guy back at the bar. "I thought I just told you to get outta'
here!!"
"Oh no, it couldn't have been me."
The bartender leans back, crosses his arms and says, "Oh REALLY!
Then you must have a double!!"
"Thanks," says the guy, "and give my lawyer friend one too!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1979
The Adventures of Katie (Part Five)
Monday
BJ: I have notified the Police. I have notified the Postal Carriers.
What else can we do?
Diana: We have driven all the streets of Caldwell, the alleys and have
asked most people we know to watch out for her. She could be laid up
in the woods, she could be dead.
BJ: I have an idea. I will get Sandi and we will search for her.
Diana: Sandi can't find her. She is just a dog.
BJ: Sandi is a hunter. I have faith in her.
BJ gets Katie's sweater and holds it in front of Sandi.
BJ: Katie 'Owie' Katie Bye-bye, Find Katie.
They go out the front door and immediately Sandi drops her nose to the
ground
and starts to track Katie.to the place where Katie had the encounter
with the
neighbor and the dog . then to the place where Katie was hit by the
car.then
to the last place where Katie was seen. Sandi continues on .. nose to
the ground
for about another mile to the highway then she suddenly stops and howls.
the scent is lost. (If BJ had known, the howl meant..Katie is on the
highway).
To be continued
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult
*********************************************
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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