[buffalos-adult-chips] Chips For8-23-10

 



Adult Adult

Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.

I am finally getting around to watching the episodes of Carrier I
missed on PBS a few years back and last week was their
episode about going across the Equator. It was kind of
depressing to see what the initiation has become. By the mid 70's
the Navy had removed most of the physical parts of hazing
from the initiation but what fun is a tradition and an initiation
without a little hazing and harassment to make the effort
worthwhile. It was disgusting at times and uncomfortable but it
was never painful or scary so why change it. The only part that
wouldn't work well in a co-ed Navy was at the end when you took
all of your clothes off and threw them off the fantail supposedly
to signify removing the slime of your previous polliwog days
from your body but usually your dungarees were so soaked with
grease and garbage that they were never going to come clean
again anyhow. Then they activated the water wash down system
so that you could wash some of the gunk off so you didn't track it
through the ship while you headed to the showers. The reward
in it was that besides a nifty scroll telling the world that you
were a shellback, you had the right to be the tormentor the next
time around and dress like a pirate plus you have a story to
tell your grandkids and memories to share with your buddies.
The only problem is that the way it has changed the young people
won't believe you. We have become the ones who had to walk
10 miles to school each day through waist deep snow uphill
both ways. I have pictures though where my parents didn't and no
I don't have any pictures of 4000 sailors running naked through the
sprinklers.

Enjoy the chips.... buffalo

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Little Johnny Chips
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Teacher asks kindergarten students what kind of medicines they know
and what they are used for.

First pupil: 'Tylenol?'
Teacher: 'Very good! And what is it used for?'
Pupil: 'It is used for headaches'

Second pupil: 'Nytol Teacher'
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Pupil: 'To help you sleep'

Now it is Johnny's turn and he says: 'Viagra'
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for?'
Johnny: 'It can be used for diarrhea'
Teacher: 'Who told you this?'
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Short Chips
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Little Johnny's mother decided to give her son an anatomy lesson one
day, so she took off all of her clothes and pointed to her vagina,
and said, "Johnny. This is where you come from." Johnny went to
school the next day smiling and insisting all his friends now refer
to him as "Lucky Johnny." "Why?" one asked. Johnny held his fingers
an inch apart and said, "Because I came this close to being a turd."

"A survey asked people if they would consider having sex with
somebody for money. 41% of the people asked said they would if the
offer was large enough. The average woman said it had to be
$100,000 and the average man said, 'I don't know, how much do you
have on you right now?'"
- Craig Kilborn

Two cowboys are out on the range talking about their favorite sex
positions.

One says "I think I enjoy the rodeo position the best."

"I don't think I have ever heard of that one," says the other
cowboy. "What is it?"

"Well, it's where you get your girlfriend on all fours, mount her
from behind, and reach around and cup her breasts in your hands.
Then you whisper in her ear, 'Boy, these feel just like your
sister's,' and then try to hold on for 8 seconds."

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Doctor Chips
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After his exam the doctor said to the elderly man, 'You appear to be
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The doctor then said to her: 'Your husband had an unusual concern.
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Short Chips
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A yuppie business woman in town for an important meeting,
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"Women should be obscene and not heard."
---Groucho Marx

A stunning blonde had gone to her student advisor for some
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"Are you feeling OK?" he asked.
"Well, to be honest, I have this compulsion to have sex with
every man I meet," she admitted. "Is there a name for my
condition?"
"Why yes, there is," he said, as he picked her up and began
carrying her to the couch. "It's called 'Good News'."

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Horny Chips
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Ten Signs He Wants To Get Laid
1. Watching a nature show where animals fornicate, he keeps winking
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8. When you're insulted by his "motel" suggestion at the end of
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9. When you proudly recount your glorious high school valedictory
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10. When you tell him what you do for a living, he stares at your
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Penis Chips
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During World War II, the Japanese attacked an American warship. A
torpedo was heading towards the ship and a hit seemed inevitable.
The
captain told the navigator to go down to the crew quarters and tell
a
joke or something, at least they would die laughing.

The navigator went down and said to the crew, "What would you think
if I could split the whole ship in two by hitting my penis against
the table?"

The crew burst out laughing. So, the navigator pulled his penis out
and whammed it on the table. Just when his penis hit the table, a
huge explosion tore the ship apart. The only survivors were the
captain and the navigator.

As they floated around in a lifeboat, the captain asked the
navigator, "Well, the crew really laughed. What did you do?"

The navigator then told him the story. The captain replied, "Well,
you better be careful with that penis of yours. The torpedo missed!"

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Toon Chips
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Limerick Chips
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A remarkable race are the Persians,
They have such peculiar diversions.
They screw the whole day
In the regular way,
And save up the nights for perversions.
___________________________

A man from the Washington Post
Once had it off with a ghost;
At the height of orgasm
The pale ectoplasm
Shrieked: "I'm coming! I'm coming... almost!"
___________________________

A neurotic young playboy named Gleason
Liked boys for no tangible reason
A frontal lobotomy
All but cured him of sodomy
But ruined his plans for the season.
<Snagged by>
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Parting Chips
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The Pope was finishing his sermon. He ended it with the Latin
phrase, "Tuti Homini" - Blessed be Mankind.

A women's rights group approached the Pope the next day. They
noticed that the pope blessed all Mankind, but not Womankind The
next day, after His sermon, the Pope concluded by saying, "Tuti
Homini, et Tuti Femini" - Blessed be Mankind and Womankind.

The next day, a gay-rights group approached the Pope. They said
that they noticed that he blessed man kind and woman kind, and asked
if he could also bless gay people. The Pope said, "Sure".

The next day, the Pope concluded his sermon with, "Tuti Homini, et
Tuti Femini, et Tuti Fruiti."

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Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Katie's Komfort Kolumn Vol 1865

Heaven

BJ is in Caldwell and is pondering an idea.

BJ: So Katie is still escaping right?

Diana: Right and it is driving me crazy.

BJ: I have an idea.

Diana: I am listening.

BJ: Let me take her back to Guthrie with me.
I think her behavior is due to something else. Let me spend some
time with her and I will find out what it is.

Diana: Why don't you just spend some time with her here?

BJ: I can't. Sandi and Val barge in.

So Sunday it is time for BJ to head back. He loads up the car but
this time something is different. Katie senses something. she
starts to dance, she is excited. BJ gets her special leash.

Katie: YES!!!!

BJ: The other dogs are okay. I would take Sandi if she wanted to
go.

Sandi: Nah, I am fine here.

BJ and Katie get in the car and head back home . to Guthrie.

Katie: Thanks father. The herd

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Adult Adult Adult

Remember 9/11/01

Regarding any problems unsubscribing this mailing list

In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:

William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783

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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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