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THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
where the world goes for its daily dose of humor!
(made in the USA)
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GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Before getting into the jokes and follies today,
I want to share aletterfrom a postman fan for the benefit
of you who think incorrectly that you are protected by such
programs as Mcafees virus scanner and Norton's
anti virus. (both of which are junk) For my employment in the
"real world",I work for an Internet service provider. Every time
I talk to a customer who uses either of these programs, my first
advice to them is to dump them off your hard drive like doo doo
to wash off your boots. Consider a letter from this postman fan:
Bob writes:
Martin, I've had both Norton and Mcaffee's, thinking that I was
protected against viruses and what not. ....much to my surprise,
how wrong I was,What can I do for some adequate protection?
Bob.
Well Bob, lets start with a couple facts. First, there is no
real fool proof program out there to protect you from the attack
of viruses, or adware However, there CERTAINLY are better choices
than either of the 2 you have mentioned. They're fact are
both a free download. The first is called Cyber Defender...
CyberDefender is a full featured Internet security suite
that protects PCs against fast moving threats.
Discover infections other security
software misses with protection from: spyware,
viruses, spam, phishing, pop-ups, adware and
Internet identity theft. Enjoy rapid detection and
protection from fast-moving online security
threats and full compatibility with other antivirus
and security software products. CyberDefender'
patent pending early NETWORK is the world's first
distributed system for security updates which
detects and immunizes PCs against new virus
attacks within hours after discovery.
Each computer using the Early Detection
Center is a part of the collaborative network
solution. PCs on the CyberDefender network are
on the lookout for suspicious files and
relays them to the Early Alert Center which
then quickly analyzes and provides threat definitions to
update the entire network.
CLICK FOR A FREE DOWNLOAD
http://www.tinyurl.
The other suggestion I have is PC BUG DOCTOR,
also a free download: Its an all purpose tool and itts good for
making your computer more efficient
You will not believe how common it is for
an average PC to have 200 or more errors. When you
install/uninstall software a lot of programs leave trash
laying around on your pc. Old shortcuts to
non existent programs, redundant files,
invalid application paths.
This list goes on and on, The Bug Doctor fixes
all these errors and hundreds more.
Let the doctor make you a house call and fix
those errors for you today so you can
enjoy a faster and more efficient PC.
TRY A FREE DOWNLOAD
http://www.tinyurl.
And one comment from Jenna:
Hey postman,
I quit smoking the other day, This is what I used.
Its a free trial, and I suggest you tell your readers!
It is VERY well worth it!
Jenna,
OK Jenna,
I checked it out. I think I'm gonna try it too.
The Postman
For the last two years Zerosmoke has helped over 2 million
people worldwide stop smoking. Now this product has been
approved for sale in the US and is available for less than two
cartons of cigarettes. No Pills, No Patches, No Potions
... just results!
Try it risk free now...
http://www.tinyurl.
Now here is something I bet you didn't know about.
Its another recall of one of those made in China deals.
Seems the company made both playground equipment
and also kitchen utensils? well they moved the company
to Peking, and in the process it seems they got the dies mixed
up. Gonna mean a lot of recalls...
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman!
THE COMICS
raise your hand
http://www.thepostm
cheating
http://www.thepostm
waiter, whats this in my soup?
http://www.thepostm
don't ask
http://www.thepostm
you think they will allow that?
http://www.thepostm
don't worry
http://www.thepostm
granny forgot
http://www.thepostm
what the budget allows
http://www.thepostm
dinner time with the cannibals
http://www.thepostm
the way the rich do it
http://www.thepostm
============
Interesting Year 1981
1. Prince Charles got married
2. Liverpool crowned soccer Champion of Europe
3. Australia lost the Ashes tournament.
4. Pope Died
Interesting Year 2005
1. Prince Charles got married
2. Liverpool crowned soccer Champion of Europe
3. Australia lost the Ashes tournament
4. Pope Died
Lesson Learned:
The next time Charles gets married...someone warn the Pope!
============
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES!
how to enjoy your colonoscopy
http://www.thepostm
National husband day care center
http://www.thepostm
Senator Craig's new video
http://www.thepostm
flying the flag...
http://www.thepostm
I'm a gummy bear.
http://www.thepostm
____________
An old retired Army Colonel was telling a young man about his own
younger days in the Jungles of Borneo...
"I vividly remember the day..." The Old Boy recalled,
"I was creeping through the jungle..."
"When this great big Bengal Tiger lept out of the jungle and went
'ROOOOAAAAARRRR'
The Old Boy paused, then said; "I shit my britches!"
"I'm not surprised," Said the young man. "I would shit my britches
too if a tiger leapt out at me like that!"
"No, no..." Replied the old boy... "Not back then!
Just now when I went,
'ROOOOAAAAARRRR'
____________
Women believe if a pet cat strays,
it's because of a lack of affection at home.
Women believe if a pet dog strays,
it's because of a lack of affection at home.
Women believe if a woman strays,
it's because of a lack of affection at home.
Women believe if a man strays,
it's because men are all scum.
____________
During a commercial airline flight a Navy Pilot was seated next to a
young mother with a babe in arms.
When her baby began crying during the descent
for landing, the mother
began nursing her infant as discreetly as possible.
The pilot pretended not to notice and, upon debarking,
he gallantly offered
his assistance to help with the various baby-related impedimenta.
When the young mother expressed her gratitude,
the pilot responded, 'Gosh,
that's a good looking baby...and he sure was hungry!'
Somewhat embarrassed, the mother explained that
her pediatrician said breast
feeding would help alleviate the pressure in the baby's ears.
The Navy Pilot sadly shook his head,
and in true pilot fashion exclaimed...
'Damn!......
____________
A young lady goes to a store and says to the salesman,
"I need some batteries for my vibrator."
He motions with his finger, "Come this way..."
She says,
"If I could come that way I wouldn't need a fucking vibrator."
____________
A fellow in a bar notices a woman, always alone, who comes
in on a fairly regular basis.
After the second week, he made his move.
"No thank you," she said politely."
"This may sound rather odd in this day and age, but I'm
keeping myself pure until I meet the man I love."
"That must be rather difficult," the man replied.
"Oh, I don't mind too much," she said. "But, it has my
husband pretty upset."
BUFFALO'S MOVIES
Movies
Der Golf
http://www.buffalos
Yeah The Movie
http://www.buffalos
Head On
http://www.buffalos
LAB LAUGHS
Tough Hemorroids
http://www.lablaugh
Sweet Dreams
http://www.lablaugh
Sobriety Test
http://www.lablaugh
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman!
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/PostmansCorner
or http://www.thepostmanscorner.net
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