Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
I finally upgraded to Internet Explorer 8.0 a few weeks ago and
frankly I like it. There was no large leap in technology like 7.0
was but the changes pop up as you are using it and you almost
wonder if it was always that way. Since I have been using it
I have noticed it is no longer necessary to clear my temporary
internet files. Less stuff written to your hard drive, less stuff to
erase later, and less stuff to navigate around while you are
accessing files.
I don't usually clear browser history on my computer as I use the
address bar to keep addresses I visited handy without having a
billion bookmarks. Microsoft made that easier by letting you
delete individual addresses from the address bar.
I have noticed that IE 8 does pull about 20 meg of ram more than
IE 7 did in the same application but it is not indestructible. Eva
kills mine about once a night running four or five flash
applications
in separate windows and it will pop a runtime error. If I am not
around to clear it, Eva will reboot the computer. She hasn't learned
how to use the function for reopening closed files but she knows
how to get to them in the bookmarks.
I like Internet Explorer 8.0. It is designed to work with the
greatest
number of websites and I don't have to spend a lot of time looking
for add-ons to fit my purpose. I paid 200.00 for an Operating system
and I want to use the browser it was designed to use.
Enjoy the chips .... buffalo
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A conceited new rookie was pitching his first game. He walked the
first five men he faced and the manager took him out of the game.
The
rookie slammed his glove on the ground as he yelled, "Darn it, the
jerk took me out when I had a no-hitter going.
Q. Why did Eve bite the forbidden apple?
A:. Because it tasted better than Adam's banana.
A blonde at a party was telling her friend that she'd gone off men
for life. "They lie, they cheat, and they're just no good," she
moaned. "From now on when I want sex, I'm going to use my tried and
tested plastic companion," she said.
"What happens when the batteries run out?" asked her friend.
"That's simple," replied the blonde. "I'll just fake an orgasm as
usual!"
A Scotsman is on holiday in New York City. It's a balmy spring day
and he is wearing a kilt.
A young woman comes up to him and boldly asks him if anything is
worn
beneath the kilt.
"No lassie" he replies, "everything is in fine working order."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
Cat Toilet
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Cat Toy
http://www.sydesjok
Cat Welfare
http://www.sydesjok
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Masturbation Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Reasons Masturbation Is Better Than Real Sex
1. Your hand always lets you finish first.
2. It's free.
3. Same reason my Chevy is better than a Ferrari: It's all I can
get.
4. You call the position.
5. "Premature ejaculation"
6. No weird looks when you pull out the peanut butter.
7. Your privates are your best friend.
8. Your girlfriend is just a piece of skin that you have sex with.
9. Gives a single man good reason to wash his socks.
10. Easier to join their "Mile High Club."
11. You get to scream out your own name.
12. Peeing is considered foreplay.
13. Nobody ever says, "Why is it all green and wrinkly?"
14. You'll never have two women, but you'll always have two HANDS!
15. Four words: "Brad Pitt hand puppet."
16. You can do it and play Interactive Top Ten at the same time.
17. Don't have to clean up fur afterwards.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Slap Chop - Dice, Chop & Mince in Seconds
Slap Chop makes chopping up vegetables, nuts and fruits quick and
easy. The food gets finer with every slap - you'll never need to
switch the blade. Slap Chop is dishwasher safe making clean up a
breeze.
Order one today and get a second one at no charge.
View Web Version
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bridge Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A young woman in Cheboygan was so depressed that she
decided to end her life by throwing herself into the
Straits. She went to the Mackinaw Bridge and was about
to leap into the frigid water when a handsome young
sailor saw her tottering on the rail, crying.
He took pity on her and said, "Look, you have so much
to live for. I'm off to Europe in the morning, and if
you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take
good care of you and bring you food every day."
Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder
and added, "I'll keep you happy, and you'll keep me
happy."
The girl nodded yes. After all,what did she have to
lose? Perhaps a fresh start in Europe would give her
life new meaning.
That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her
in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he brought
her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made
passionate love until dawn.
Three weeks later, during a routine inspection, she
was discovered by the captain.
"What are you doing here?" the captain asked.
"I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she
explained. "I get food and a trip to Europe, and he's
screwing me."
"He certainly is," the captain said. "This is the
Mackinaw Island Ferry."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Keep Your Food Fresh Up To 50 Days Longer
Always Fresh Containers help extend the lifespan of your fruits,
vegetables and much more. This ultimate food storage system absorbs
and removes food-spoling ethylene gas released during the natural
ripening process.
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Motto Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Personal Mottos
A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth.
Do I look like a fucking people person?
This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
I started out with nothing...and I still have most of it left.
I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
If I throw a stick, will you leave?
And just how may I fuck you over today?
And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?
I'm just working here till a good fast-food job opens up.
I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.
I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
One of us is thinking about sex...
OK, it's me.
I have a computer, a vibrator, & pizza delivery. Why should I
leave the house?
I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?
It's sick the way you people keep having sex without me.
I work 40 hours a week to be this poor.
Okay, okay, I take it back! UnFuck you!
Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
You look like shit. Is that the style now?
Earth is full. Go home.
I thought I wanted a career, turns out all I wanted was
paychecks.
It ain't the size, it's... no, it's the size.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Swirly Hair Clip
Style your hair without the crimp. Swirly flexes to style hair
perfectly and it holds it firm without tearing your hair. It comes
with the Swirly Hair Style Guide that's full in color and accordian
style for easy viewing.
Style your hair without the crimp today.
View Website
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Taxi Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Maureen O'Murrah had taken a Manhattan taxi home from work, since
both
of the ladies she usually carpooled with had taken sick. In the
confusion of the short-handed office staff, and hurrying downstairs
to
meet the cab, she had left her purse behind.
As the cab pulled up to her apartment building, she was looking
about
the seat for her purse when the driver told her the price of her
ride.
In great embarrassment, she said, "Ach. I'm not believin' I did
this,
Sir, but me purse isn't here. I must have left behind. I'm sorry,
but
I'm not havin' the money to pay you just now."
The driver was...well, he was a Manhattan taxi driver. He said,
"That's
all right Missy, I'll just pull down into that dark street ahead,
and
get back there with you, and I'll just take your panties off."
Maureen chuckled, and said "Shure, an' it's the poor end of the
trade
that you'll be gettin'. These panties only cost eighty-nine cents."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Answer 10 questions and your Death Date will be revealed
Here:
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Butter Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man is showering in a locker room with his buddy when he notices
for
the first time, that his friend is very well endowed. "Damn Bob,
you're
hung!"
Jim exclaims. "I wasn't always this big, says Bob, "I had to
exercise
and work for it."
"What do you mean?"
Jim asked. "Well Jim," Bob responds; "every day for the past two
years
I've spent an hour each night rubbing it with butter. I know it
sounds
crazy but it actually grew 4 inches. Why don't YOU give it a try?"
Jim
agrees and the two say good bye.
A few weeks later the two are in the same locker room and Bob asks
Jim
how his "BIGGERIN" project was coming along.
Jim replied; "I did what you said, Bob, but I've actually gotten
smaller! --
I lost two inches
already!"
"Did you do everything I told you? -- an hour each day with butter?"
asks Bob.
"Well, I was out of butter, so I've been using Crisco."
"Crisco?!?" Bob yelled; "Dammit Jim, don't you know? Crisco's
shortening!.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
World's Most Convenient Multi-Use Steamer
Steam Buddy is the quickest and safest way to remove wrinkles. It
gives you the power of the dry cleaner in the palm of your hand.
Steam Buddy is gentle enough for silk, but touch enough for linens.
It heats up in seconds and eliminates the hassle of ironing boards.
Steam up your life with Steam Buddy.
View Website
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Auntie
http://www.silveran
Life In The Manure Pile
http://www.wtv-
Carol w/ Sea of Life
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Downfall
http://www.poetryby
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Surfin Surfari
Cash for Clunkers Eligible Trade-In Vehicle List - Edmunds.com
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Paper Furniture - How cool ! Via Wesley
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Unusual Museums and Strange Weird Bizarre Collections
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Discovery Kids
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Freeware Firewall
http://www.filehipp
Animated Cursors
http://sites-
WebMaster Utilities_ Perl Archive
http://www.perlarch
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Your PC may be suffering from serious file errors in your WINDOWS
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minutes.
If after completing the free Diagnostic Test it is brought to your
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then it may be in your computer's best interest to fix the
potentially harmful file errors in your registry.
Press below to launch the Diagnostics Test download now:
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Animal World
Doggie Zone
http://www.reflecti
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Zoo Animals
http://www.shangral
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Movie Clips
Depression Medication
http://www.buffalos
Hand Up
http://www.buffalos
Disappointment
http://www.buffalos
Don't look away when I'm talking to you
http://www.buffalos
Don't Work From home
http://www.buffalos
Egg Trick
http://www.buffalos
Einstein
http://www.buffalos
El Rey Del Martillo
http://www.buffalos
En weg zijn re rimpels
http://www.buffalos
Engineers
http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Random Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The show girls had entertained the troops all afternoon at a remote
army base. After the performance, the major asked, "Would you girls
like to mess with the enlisted men or the officers?" "It doesn't
matter," one bold girl replied. "But we would like something to eat
first."
You remind me of a championship bass, I don't know whether to mount
you or eat you!
A guy walks into the bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and says,
"Honey, this is the cow I make love to when you have a headache."
The
wife, laying in the bed reading a book, looks up and says, "If you
weren't such an idiot, you'd know that's a sheep, not a cow." The
guy
replies, "If you weren't such a presumptuous bitch, you'd realize I
was talking to the sheep."
Why is food better than men? Because you don't have to wait an
hour
for seconds.
How do we know that the bikini was invented for orthodox Jews? It
separates the meat from the dairy sections.
Little Red Riding Hood is walking through the woods, when the Big
Bad
Wolf jumps out and says, "Argh! I'm going to fuck you." She says,
"Bull-shit. You're gonna stick the script, and you're gonna eat me,
you hairy bastard."
Stan Kegel
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Safely Talk and Drive at the Same Time
Jupiter Jack let's you talk without using your hands. It transmits
quality sound through the speakers in your car. Just plug Jupiter
Jack in your phone, preset your radio to 99.3 FM and you're ready to
start talking.
Order now and you'll get two Jupiter Jacks for the price of one.
View Website
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
24 Hr Bra
http://www.buffalos
36 Long
http://www.buffalos
50 Cal
http://www.buffalos
69 For Dummies
http://www.buffalos
69th
http://www.buffalos
Escape
http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Get Your Diabetes Meal Planner
Click below and answer a few questions to get your meal planner.
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
When a horny old man fell asleep in the sun,
the zipper on his fly somehow came undone,
He awoke with a smile,
Said, "My gosh, a sundial,
And it's not a quarter past one.
There once was a woman from Latch
Who jacked herself with a match
She got so excited
Then damn thing ignited
And burnt all the hair off her snatch
There was once man named Penn
who said "Let us do it again,
And again and again
and again and again
and again and again and again!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Egg Genie - Automatic Egg Cooker
Steam cook eggs to perfect consistently whether its soft, hard or
even medium boiled. Egg Genie has a light and sound indicator to let
you know when eggs are done. It's also great for steaming
vegetables. Included with your order is the Baconwave - cook tasty,
crispy bacon in your microwave.
Prepare perfect eggs with Egg Genie.
View Web Version
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A famous British aviator relates:
Women pilots relate every aspect of their lives to aviation.
The first lady said her lover was like a Cessna Aero-bat
got up to operating height very quickly, capable of amazing
aerobatics,
but with a short duration.
The second lady likened her man to a Piper Cherokee -
slow to climb, but with an endurance of no less than 4 hours.
The third lady thought hers was like a Tiger Moth,
coming out once a year for the annual display, and
relying on a hand start.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two Englishmen, out for a night on the town, picked up a couple of
women in a dimly lit pub and began touring the town. In another pub,
while the ladies were occupied in the powder room, one of the men
whispered to the other: "I say, old man, would you mind if we
switched
dates?" "No," said the other. "But yours seems a decent sort, what's
wrong with her?" "Nothing much," replied the first, "but between the
smog and the grog and the fog, I seem to have picked up an aunt of
mine."
Stan Kegel
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Flies Away
Stop swatting, shooing, and spraying and get the ultimate
green invention for getting rid of flies.
Protect your farm, your home, your property, and your
barbecues from fly invasion.
Just add water plus the bait and hang outside. That's it!
Flies Away makes your home a No-Fly Zone.
Traps & Kills up to 20,000 flies!
Currently used by farmers, equestrians to get rid of flies.
Patented, bio-degradable and non-toxic bait, used by the U.S.
Military.
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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