Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
I hope everyone had a fantastic Valentine's Day. My proposals
and propositions to Sandy even when sweetened with chocolate
did me no good. I didn't really expect them to but you have to
keep. I happened to notice yesterday that Wisconsin had declared
that surrogates deserve paid medical insurance so I am thinking
about moving to Wisconsin and becoming a surrogate father and
see if I get better health insurance then I have right now. With my
luck all I'd get is a paternity suit.
Speaking of Wisconsin I saw where their governor is readying the
National Guard as he goes after the collective bargaining units of
public employees and teachers to try to keep his state from
bankruptcy. I don't want to deny anyone a decent wage but we
have elementary school principals up here making 100k and if
they did as poor a job in the private world, they would have
been fired long ago. I could go deeper but I know too many
school employees to have them all yelling at me at the same time.
Enjoy the chips... buffalo
A newsletter you may enjoy
I am starting this Group to have some fun and meet new people.
You may post anything BUT Betty Boops (I am so tired of BOOPS LOL)
Post child friendly sites,recipes,poems etc.. as long as it is not
Adult Material.
We may even play a game or two.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Anything-Butt-Boops/
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Kiwi Chips
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A New Zealander, an Aussie and a South African were all in Saudi
Arabia, sharing a smuggled carton of beer. All of a sudden, Saudi
police rushed in and arrested them. The mere possession of alcohol
is a severe offence in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime of
actually being caught consuming the beer, they were sentenced to
death! However, after many months and with the help of very good
lawyers, they were able to succesfully appeal their sentence down to
life imprisonment.
By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their
trial finished, and the extremely benevolent Sheikh decided they
could be released after receiving just 20 lashes each of the whip.
As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheikh suddenly
said: "It's my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to
allow each of you one wish before your whipping."
The South African was first in line (he had drunk the least), so he
thought about this for a while and then said: "Please tie a pillow
to
my back."
This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip
went through. The South African had to be carried away bleeding and
crying with pain when the punishment was done.
The Kiwi was next up (he almost finished a stubbie), and after
watching the scene, said: "Choice! Please fix two pillows on my
back. " But even two pillows could only take 15 lashes before the
whip went through again.
The Aussie was the last one up (he had finished off the carton), but
before the Aussie could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him and
said:
"You are from a most beautiful country, your Cricket team is the
best
in the world, your footballers are terrific and your women are very
sexy. For this, may have two wishes!".
"Thanks mate, your Most Royal and Merciful Highness", The Aussie
replies.
"In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me
not 20, but100 lashes." "Not only are you an honourable, handsome
and
powerful man, you are also very brave" the Sheik says with an
admiring look on his face.
"If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And your second
wish?
What is it to be?" the Sheik asks.
"Please tie the New Zealander to my back."
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have a seat
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a beer belly
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the good news
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Valentine Chips
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Some Valentine Cards That Probably Wont Go Over Too Well
We're perfect for each other...
I can't hold a job and you have a trust fund.
Will you be my sweet valentine?
Please let me know as soon as possible, because I have some backups
in mind.
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways...
One... Two.... yeah, that is about it I guess!
Tonight is going to be a special night.
Just you and me and ESPN.
I admire your strength, I admire your spunk
but the thing I like best, is getting you drunk.
Our love will never become cold and hollow
Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow.
I bought this Valentine's card at the store
In hopes that, later, you'd be my whore.
This feels so good, it feels so right
I just wish it wasn't $250 a night.
You're a woman of style, you're a woman of class
especially when I'm spanking, your big-round-fat ass.
Through all the things that came to pass
Our love has grown. . . but so's your ass.
You're a honey. . . and you're a cutie
I just wished you had J-Lo's "booty."
I don't wanna be sappy or silly or corny
So, right to the point, let's do it, I'm horny!
If you think that hickey looks like a blister
You should check out the one that I gave to your sister!
To my snuggly-wuggly, eentsy-weentsy, honeyy-baby...
I am going to screw you so hard tonight.
Honey, be mine!
Can I do you from behind?
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Fireman Chips
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There was a fireman who was very regimental and did everything by
the bell. He gets married and on his honeymoon night explains this
to his new wife.
Fireman: "Honey, I do everything by the bell, so when we hear one
bell (ding), we run upstairs; two bells (ding ding), we get
undressed and; three bells (ding ding ding) we make wild passionate
love."
Wife: "OK sweetheart, I understand."
So the night goes on and soon you hear one bell (ding) they run
upstairs; two bells (ding ding) they get undressed and; three bells
they start making wild, passionate love to each other. All of a
sudden...
Wife: "Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding."
Fireman: "Honey, honey, what's that for?"
Wife: "More hose, more hose."
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Random Chips
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Some times it's difficult for disabled people to find jobs, so I was
happy to hear from Terry, a paraplegic who used a manual wheelchair,
that he had a job. Terry said he worked in a strip club, taking back
the clothes after the women had left the stage. I asked him what the
money was like. 'Twenty bucks a week,' he told me. 'That's not
much,' was my comment. 'That's all I could afford!' he replied.
When their first grandchild was born, Minnie asked her husband Earl,
'Well, Earl, how does it feel to he a grandfather?" Earl replied,
"Oh, it feels wonderful, of course, Now what feels strange is that
I'll have to get used to the idea of sleeping with a grandmother.
Nuns ran an orphanage for girls in a rural part of Georgia. One day,
the Mother Superior called in 3 teenage girls who were about to
leave and seek their way in life. "You have led a very sheltered
life and you are going into an extremely sinful world." she said. "I
must warn you that men will take advantage of you. They'll do
anything to get their way. They'll take you to restaurants, buy you
drinks and dinner, then back to their apartments and motels where
they'll undress you, do terrible things, give you twenty or thirty
dollars and kick you out." "Excuse me, Mother." one of the girls
asked. "You mean men will take advantage of us and give us CASH?"
"Yes child, why do you ask?" "Because the priests only give us
Candy!"
I've been to many debutante balls and the girls all wear low-cut
gowns. It's very clear why they call them "Coming out parties."
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Random Chips
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Little Johnny is sitting on the front porch steps, and his
17-year-old sister is sitting in the swing in a dress with no
panties. She notices Johnny trying to get a look up her dress so
she picks up her knees and spreads her legs and asked "Johnny, what
do you think about my WILDCAT?" Johnny looks up, stares all bug-eyed
and replies, "That's a mean motherfucker, sis!" Sis asks, "Why do
you think he's mean?"
Johnny says, "Just look at him, sis, he's got blood in one eye and
shit in the other!"
The waitress at the Greek beanery married the boss, and they seemed
quite happy. But one day she sued him for divorce. Her charge: He
was indifferent.
Just because your penis surgery was not successful is no reason to
go off half-cocked.
If sex was sold in a grocery store, there's gonna be confusion over
"Trix on Aisle 3" and "Tricks" on Aisle 10.
You are on the bus when you suddenly realize you need to fart. The
music is really loud, so you time your farts with the beat. After a
couple of songs, you start to feel better as you approach your stop.
As you are leaving the bus, people are really staring you down, and
that's when you remember: you've been listening to your ipod!
Band Members do it in front of 100,000 people
Cross Poster: A transvestite who abuses newsgroups
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LynnLynn's Links
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If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com
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Subscribers and Friends
Melva/A Love Story
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/R/Plan.html
Rick w/Love Thee
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Carolyn w/Blue Eyes Crying
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Babes In Christ
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Deleting Files
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Mcafee Site Advisor
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Movie Links
Men's Locker room
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Magic Finger Find The G Spot
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My new Philosophy
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My SS Check
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NEVER MARRY A WOMAN BIGGER THAN YOU!
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It Looked Like A Parking Space
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Kind So Flunky
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ABC Banner
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Adidas DM
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Marine Chips
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A U.S. Marine Colonel was about to start the morning briefing to
his staff
While waiting for the coffee machine to finish brewing, the
colonel
decided to pose a question to all assembled.
He explained that his wife had been a bit frisky the night before
and he
failed to get his usual amount of sound sleep..
He posed the question of just how much of sex was "work" and how
much of
it was "pleasure?"
A Major chimed in with 75-25% in favor of work.
A Captain said it was 50-50%.
A lieutenant responded with 25-75% in favor of pleasure, depending
upon
his state of inebriation at the time.
There being no consensus, the colonel turned to the PFC who was in
charge
of making the coffee and asked for HIS opinion?
Without any hesitation, the young PFC responded, "Sir, it has to
be 100%
pleasure."
The colonel was surprised and as you might guess, asked why?
"Well, sir, if there was any work involved, the officers would have
me
doing it for them."
The room fell silent........
God Bless the enlisted man!
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Toon Chips
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Limerick Chips
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blame dog
http://www.buffaloschips.com/nmnnbvhhkj.htm
blanket repair
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blind
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blind 2
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blind asshole
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blind date
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Parting Chips
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Forgot my glasses ...
Yesterday my Wife asked why I didn't do something useful with my
time. She suggested I go down to the senior center and hang out
with the guys.
I did this and when I got home last night I told her that I had
joined a parachute club.
She said "Are you nuts? You're almost 80 years old and you're going
to go jumping out of airplanes again?"
I proudly showed her that I even got a membership card.
She said to me, "Dear, where are your glasses! This is a membership
to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club!"
'"I'm really in trouble now," I said . . . "I signed up for five
jumps a week!"
Life as a senior citizen is not getting any easier.
Dennis
Two guys are getting drunk in a bar talking.
One was going on and on about a motel he and his wife had stayed at.
"I tell ya," he said excitedly, "this place was cool. It had a
Jacuzzi, a sex swing, hell it had a contraption that we just
couldn't figure out what to do with--so I shoved it up her ass."
"Really? Hmmmm," his friend said.
"You gotta take your wife there."
"My wife? I'm not taking my wife, she won't do any of that stuff.
I'm thinking I'll take your wife."
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Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1978
The Adventures of Katie (Part Four)
Late Sunday
Katie: I could phone father..Yes, that is what I will do.
Oh darn it, my cell phone is damaged from the car accident.
Katie: I must not panic. Rudy, Sandi, Val and I just talked about
our hidden internal compass and finding our way home. Sandi
said she could find her way home to either Guthrie or Caldwell,
Rudy said he could only find his way to Caldwell that Guthrie has
been erased and the same for Val. I can only fix Guthrie in my
compass. I cannot find Caldwell. Daddy said it was 100 miles to
Guthrie.ack. Well time to hit the road. I mean how far is 100
miles. I sleep all the way and I sleep for only 90 minutes so it
cannot
be far.
Four hours later...
Katie: It is cold, I am hungry. I do not see any Pizza Huts out
here.
At least there is a lot of snow for me to chomp on and have water.
My pedometer says I have gone eight miles so that means I only have
to go 92 miles. I am doomed!!!
I could hunt, if I knew how. Sandi hunts, Rudy has hunted. But I
cannot.
I don't want to hurt Bugs Bunny.
Darkness Falls..
Katie: A farmhouse.. I can crawl under the porch and seek shelter
for the
night. Only 90 more miles.
To be continued
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Adult Adult
*********************************************
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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