[PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner!



 

THE POSTMAN'S CORNER

 

 

The block of granite which was an
obstacle in the pathway of the weak,
became a stepping-stone in the
pathway of the strong.
~~Thomas Carlyle

 


SURE CLIPS
AS SEEN ON TV!!!!
Magnifies, Clips, and Files for Perfect Nails
Sure Clip is the world's most advanced nail clipper.
The wide, rubberized non-slip comfort grip
gives you complete control and the professional
quality stainless steel blades give a clean, precise
cut every time. With an extra wide opening the Sure
Clip easily cuts right through thick and hard nails.
There's even a built in diamond-edge steel file,
to smooth edges or for quick touch ups.
No more flying clips, bending over to clean up,
or struggling to see what you're cutting.
http://tinyurl.com/n2wjon


GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Couple of months ago, for my birthday,
the war department took me up to Kohl's.
(Belt broke.) It is an accomplishment to
get me to do any kind of shopping, so this
took a little convincing. But, when your pants
won't stay up, some times ya gotta do what ya
gotta do. Right? Any ways, found the kind I
wanted and says "lets go" after a couple minutes
of shopping. But unfortunately, I'd made the
mistake of taking her with me.
She says lets look a little more,
And an hour later, I walked out of the store with
the belt I had picked after two minutes. To make a
long story short, they were "buy one get one free."
So I got 2. Unfortunately, I failed to notice the
label (made in China) and after a few weeks, both
of them broke. And who has a receipt after you bought
something 2 months ago? Well its worth a shot, so
back up to Kohl's I go. And you know what? they gave
me a store credit even without a receipt. I was surprised!
I strongly recommend doing your shopping at Kohls.
And the new belt I got? says made in the USA.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_______________

 

THE COMICS

an equal
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s060.html

we just moved
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s061.html

announcement
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s062.html

crew cut
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s063.html

mommy's had a hard day
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s064.html

repellant
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s065.html

I'm different
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s066.html

wet t shirt
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/s067.html
_____________

LETS GO TO THE MOVIES

Delta
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies7095.html

special card
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies7096.html

bullfight
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies7097.html

crickets
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies7098.html

doggie plays pool
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies7099.html

the climber
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8000.html

Pincus was arrested for speeding, reckless driving, driving without
lights and violation of traffic signals.
He demanded a trial by jury.
"But you can't win that case in court," a friend advised him.
 "I know," said Pincus.  "I did it on purpose.  My nephew just
graduated from law school and this is his first case. 
I want him to lose so maybe he'll get discouraged and get an honest job."
_______________

Jim and Sally had an awful fight. Sally told Jim, "I want a
divorce and before I kick you out you can take three
things with you!" Jim pondered for a few moments and angrily
replied, "Okay witch! I want my golf clubs, shoes and my balls!"
and stormed out the door.
Later that week Jim was starting to tee up with his pals on
the first tee and they asked Jim, "Hey, if she only gave you
a choice of three things to take with you why did you pick
your clubs, shoes and balls?"Jim looked at them with a
disgusted look and said, "Duh, she's going to get my balls
anyway so I took them now before I lost 'em!!"
____________

The Committee for the Reduction of Redundancy and the
Antiproliferation of Repetition has decided not to meet
until they have their first meeting and thus will not be
meeting until the first time. Their Pre-meeting Statement
wanted to make this clear before they had their first
meeting, so that it would not be confusing.
So their first meeting will actually be their first meeting
and they will not have a meeting before the first meeting.
This should avoid having people show up for their first meeting
before it is held, since to do so would be confusing to those
who did so and this is what they want to avoid by reducing the
confusion and lessening the repetition.
________________

A visiting professor at the University of Montana is
giving a seminar on the supernatural.
To get a feel for his audience, he asks,
"How many people here believe in ghosts?"
About 90 students raise their hands.
"Well that's a good start," says the professor,
"Out of those of you who believe in ghosts, do any
of you think you've ever seen a ghost?"
About 40 students raise their hands.
"That's really good," continues the professor,
"I'm really glad you take this seriously.
Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?"
15 students raise their hands.
"That's a great response," remarks the impressed professor,
"has anyone here ever touched a ghost?"
Three students raise their hands.
"That's fantastic. But let me ask you one question further...
Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?" asks the professor.
One student in the back raises his hand.
The professor is astonished.
He takes off glasses, takes a step back, and says,
"Son, all the years I've been giving this lecture, no
one has ever claimed to have slept with a ghost. You've
got to come up here and tell us about your experience."
The redneck student replies with a nod and begins
to make his way up to the podium.
The professor asks, "Well, tell us what it's like to have sex with a ghost."
The student replies, "Ghost?!?" Dang, I thought you said 'goats.
_______________

At school Little Johnny was told by a classmate that
most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and
that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying,
"I know the whole truth."
Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. He goes
home, and as he is greeted by his mother he says, "I know
the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says,
"Just don't tell your father."
Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home
from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth."
The father promptly hands him $40 and says,
"Please don't say a word to your mother."
Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next
day when he sees the mailman at his front door.
The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth."
The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms,
and says, "Then come give your daddy a great big hug!"
_________________


BUFFALO BILL

Kind Of Scary
http://www.buffaloschips.com/werww.htm

Kitchen Table
http://www.buffaloschips.com/qwee.htm

Law Enforcement.. Dealing With The Public
http://www.buffaloschips.com/asasda.htm

Lil Red Riding Hood Chunk
http://www.buffaloschips.com/ewqwqw.htm
_____________

FUN PAGES from Lorraine

Kids For Sale Cheap
http://tinyurl.com/mphlke

Parody News
http://tinyurl.com/ndk4gy

Jesse Jackson in Trouble
http://tinyurl.com/nvvam4

THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman

 

 

 



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