THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
There are more pleasant things to do than beat up people.
Muhammad Ali
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS
Lets make sure to say a prayer for the folks
in the theater shootings out in Colorado.
Sad thing. people minding their own business.
Just out for a moment of entertainment and levity
in their hectic lives. And they are random targets.
I am sure all of you anti death penalty folks will
be offended, so I must ask your forgiveness for saying
so but you know what? I hope they fry James Holmes
12 times over. If our courts let him live, it
will be a glaring testament to the failing fabric
of America.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_____________
THE COMICS
fox hunt
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q041.html
self serve
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q042.html
spreadin the wealth
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q043.html
shadows
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q044.html
specializing
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q045.html
shhhshhh!!!
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q046.html
smile
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q047.html
fat is beautiful
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q048.html
snake bite
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q049.html
Mrs. Smith
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q050.html
_______________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
A Monkey on a Goat on a Cup on a Tightrope
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1849.html
PEOPLE ARE AWESOME 2012
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1850.html
Through The Decades
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1851.html
Pink Panther cartoon
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1852.html
An old geezer in the old folks home took a fancy to an old lady
who is also staying at the home. One day he gets UP enough
courage to tell her he wants to make love to her.
She agrees and suggests that when everyone else is gone for a day
trip, they will stay behind and get to it.
He goes to her room on the day and asks her how she likes it.
She says, "I used to like it when a man went down on me."
He says he would love to and goes for it.
After about 30 seconds he comes back up and says, "I'm sorry. I
afraid I just can't go on. It smells rotten down there."
She says, "It must be my arthritis."
He looks at her and says, "Surely you can't get arthritis down
there. And even if you could, it wouldn't cause that horrible
smell."
She says,
"No, my arthritis is in my shoulder and I can't wipe my ass
______________
He was a widower and she a widow. They had known each other
for a number of years being high school classmates and having
attended class reunions in the past without fail.
This 60th anniversary of their class, the widower and the widow
made a foursome with two other singles. They had a wonderful
evening, their spirits high. The widower throwing admiring glances
across the table. The widow smiling coyly back at him.
Finally, he picked up courage to ask her, "Will you marry me?"
After about six seconds of careful consideration, she answered,
"Yes,..... yes I will!"
The evening ended on a happy note for the widower. But the next
morning he was troubled. Did she say "Yes" or did she say "No?"
He couldn't remember. Try as he would, he just could not recall.
He went over the conversation of the previous evening, but his mind was blank.
He remembered asking the question but for the life of him he could
not recall her response. With fear and trepidation he picked up the phone and called her.
First, he explained that he couldn't remember as well as
he used to. Then he reviewed the past evening.
As he gained a little more courage he then inquired of her. "When
I asked if you would marry me, did you say "Yes" or did you say "No?"
"Why you silly man, I said `Yes. Yes I will.'
And I meant it with all my heart."
The widower was delighted. He felt his heart skip a beat.
Then she continued. "And I am so glad you called because
I couldn't remember who asked me!"
____________
A mother in law said to her son's wife when the baby was born
"I don't mean to be rude, but he doesn't look anything like my son."
The daughter in law lifted her skirt and said,
"I don't mean to be rude either, but this is a fanny, not a bloody photo copier
____________
A prospective juror in a Dallas District Court was surprised by
the definition of voluntary manslaughter given the panel: "An
intentional killing that occurs while the defendant is under the
immediate influence of sudden passion arising from an adequate cause,
such as when a spouse's mate is found in a 'compromising position.'"
"See, I have a problem with that passion business," responded the jury
candidate. "During my first marriage, I came in and found my husband
in bed with my neighbor. All I did was divorce him. I had no
idea that I could have shot him."
She wasn't selected for the jury.
_____________
THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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