Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
Had to stop by the Social Security Administration this morning
which is always makes my day. They tie the Secretary of State
for the fastest and most courteous service which is amazing for
a federal government and such a change from the little hole in
the wall office they used to have. You are greeted by a friendly
armed guard and punch your reason for being there into
a touch screen and it spits out a number and I went over and
sat down. Also in the waiting area was a couple of kids, one about
seven and the other about ten and they were arguing while their
mom was in one of the offices. The younger was tapping her
foot on the floor and the younger was complaining. It got so loud
that the mom came out and told both of them to knock it off and
went back in and it only took a second before they were at it again
louder than ever. Being the buffalo and in an April Fool's Day mood
I told them that if they weren't quiet that the guard was going to
come over and Taser the both of them. The guard was laughing
but it didn't quiet the kids down a bit. It would have worked
when I was a kid heh heh.
Enjoy the chips... buffalo
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Spring Chips
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Spring Break....
....when students work on their tans and teachers work
on their sanity.
....when students go wild someplace other than school.
....when the only thing kids study is each other.
....when teenagers give their swimsuits a dry run.
....when students take time off from football games,
basketball games, dances, parties, and hanging out
in bars, and go to Florida or Mexico and "relax."
....when the nation's college kids demonstrate to the
world how much they've learned.
....when the nation's breweries go all out to teach
another generation how to throw up responsibly.
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Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
inflation
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/h001.html
come and get it
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/h002.html
a dog
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/h003.html
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Pill Chips
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"Doc, you've gotta help me! My wife just isn't interested
in sex anymore. Haven't you got a pill or something I
can give her?"
"Look, I can't prescribe..."
"Doc, we've been friends for years. Have you ever seen
me this upset? I'm desperate! I can't think; I can't
concentrate; my life is going utterly to hell! You've got
to help me."
The doctor opens his desk drawer and removes a small
bottle of pills. "Ordinarily, I wouldn't do this. These are
experimental; the tests so far indicate that they're VERY
powerful. Don't give her more than ONE, understand?
Just ONE."
"I don't know, doc; she's awfully cold..."
"One. No more. In her coffee. Okay?"
"Um... okay."
He thanks the doc and heads for home where his wife
has dinner waiting. When dinner is finished, she goes to
the kitchen to bring dessert. In fumbling haste, pulls the
pills from his pocket and drops one into his wife's coffee.
He thinks for a moment, hesitates, then drops in a second
pill. And then he begins to worry. The doctor did say they
were powerful.
Then an inspiration strikes... he drops one pill into his own
coffee. His wife returns and they enjoy their dessert and
coffee. Sure enough, a few minutes after they finish, his
wife shudders a little, sighs deeply and heavily, and a
strange look enters her eyes. In a near-whisper and in a
tone of voice he has never heard her use before, she says,
"I need a man..."
His eyes glitter, and his hands tremble as he replies, "Yeah..
Me too.."
Randy
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Wife Chips
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A couple of old cowboys (Sam and Bubba) were sitting
in a bar having a drink (or two or three) , doing what most
old cowboys do; complaining about the heat, the cows and
their wives.
They weren't exactly the brightest guys, and neither were their
comments. Every day they said pretty much the same thing.
And it always ended in a pissing contest over who had the
worst wife.
Today though something was different. There was a wise
looking elderly Indian Chief sitting at the bar. They decided
to ask him to decide, who had the worst wife.
The first man (Sam) complained that his wife was always
arguing with him. No matter what he said, she always said
the opposite. She didn't just say it either, she said it so
loud that the neighbors complained.
The old Chief listened attentively and then said, "If your wife
was Indian, we would name her Fire-Water."
Sam asked "Why would you call her Fire-Water?"
The Indian Chief replied, "Every time she opens her mouth
she breathes fire and your knees turn to water."
The second man (Bubba) said "My wife is so bad that we
haven't hadn't had physical relations in darn near twenty years."
The chief again listened attentively and pronounced Bubba's
wife as "Sleeping-Dragon."
When Bubba asked why, the chief replied, "If you try to touch
her while she is sleeping, she will become a dragon and bite
your head off."
Sam and Bubba had a good laugh over their wives new names.
Then Sam asked, "Okay, them Indian names are pretty cool,
but.... Who has the worst wife?"
The chief replied, "I do."
Bubba asked what the chiefs wife name was.
The chief replied something along the lines of
"Whumpo Havo Noja"
Both Sam and Bubba looked very confused, and so the chief
explained, "That's my wife's Indian name, it translates in
English to "Three-Old-Horses."
More puzzled than ever before Bubba asked, "Yeah, but
what does it (Three-Old-Horses) mean?
The chief sighed, took a sip of his beer and said ,
"Nag, Nag, Nag."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Short Chips
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A little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little
lisp: "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep wittle wabiths?"
And the shopkeeper gets down one his knees, so that he's on her
level,
and asks: "Do you want a wittle white wabby or a soft and fuwwy
bwack wabby?"
She in turn puts her hands on her knees, bends forward and says,
"I don't fink my pyfon gives a fuck!"
A frantic mother called her pediatrician at two in the morning.
"Doctor," she yelled, "My baby just ate an entire tube of K-Y jelly!
What do I do?"
"Well," came the response, "if you really can't wait, call an
all-night drugstore."
The young girl said to the rather hip new priest, "Father, is it a
sin to
have sex before receiving Communion?" The priest replied, "Only if
you block the aisle."
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Viagra Chips
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A man dies "in the act" after taking Viagra and rigor mortis has set
into his private parts.
The funeral director can't get the coffin lid nailed on and has to
discuss the alternatives with the man's beautiful young widow. "I'm
afraid that the only way to get the lid on is either to pay another
$3,000 for an extra large coffin or to amputate his member."
"Well I have no more money," states the widow, "and it is against my
religion for me to bury my husband in more than one piece."
The funeral director thinks about this and then comes up with a
brain-wave: He'll amputate the member and then stick it up the
deceased's backside, in which case a more expensive coffin is
unnecessary and the husband will still be, in a manner of speaking,
in the one piece. The widow reluctantly agrees.
On the day of the funeral, the deceased is displayed in an open
casket. As the mourners file by, one mourner places flowers on the
coffin and a drop of water from the flowers falls onto the
deceased's
face, looking for all the world like a teardrop.
The next mourner to file by is the widow. She looks down at her
lifeless husband, notices the "teardrop" and says to him quietly,
"See, I told you it hurts!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com
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Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Jamey Johnson
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/Wav_Gp/Gp_7.html
"Don't be afraid" by the Cathedral Quartet (what an uplift) Via Peggy
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YgRpMjlRBR4
John w/ Time Gets Better With Age
http://soloshideawayfunpages.com/_classics/021/age.htm
Dreams
http://www.carolspoetry.com/carol04.html
Top Reasons To Smile!
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/smile.html
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Hello,
We wanted to inform you today that you can now download a program
online that will allow you to watch unlimited television from around
the world right on your PC!
Press Here to watch TV from around the world on your PC:
http://buffaloschips.com/comptv
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Surfin Surfari
WASP - Women Airforce Service Pilots Via Wesley
http://tinyurl.com/yuecay
What's In Bloom
http://www.dbg.org/index.php/plan/ourgarden/bloom2
Wrong Number - with Carol Burnett & Tim Conway:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gqQYuipF7U
Ethics Of War
http://freedom4um.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=131359
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Hi,
We would like to show you why you may be "fat" and why you're unable
to lose weight no matter how hard you try.
First off, please always know that it's not your fault...
Press here to see why you're fat:
http://buffaloschips.com/fat
After you see what the problem is, you will see how easy it is to
finally lose the fat that you want to lose.
Thank you!
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Old Version Downloads
http://www.oldapps.com:80/
Website Midis
http://www.boomspeed.com/ltah/midis.html
Free Printables Via Wesley
http://www.freeprintable.net/
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
We would like to know if you would be interested in working from
home in your spare time writing short articles for us. You will be
paid $25.00 - $45.00 per hour writing these articles.
We will also pay you $12.00 - $50.00 per hour for posing in blogs,
and up to $450 for each fiction or non fiction story we ask you to
write.
Press here if you are interested:
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All my best,
Freelance Home Writers Network
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Animal World
Doggie Zone
http://www.dogsdeservebetter.org/index.html
Eagle Vs Swan!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/eagleswan.html
Bear Rescue
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bearrescue.html
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with Sub-Zero Roses.
Order today and we'll double your order.
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Movie Links
Making Up
http://www.buffaloschips.com/sjks.htm
Mama's Boobs
http://www.buffaloschips.com/aka.htm
Milk
http://www.buffaloschips.com/ajkak.htm
Money
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jkllp.htm
What Came Over Me (Buffalo Made Me Do This)
http://www.buffaloschips.com/kakaol.htm
Why College Takes 5 Years
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jdskjhkdsj.htm
Wild
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jkskjsd.htm
Dirty Sneakers
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jdj.htm
Dodge Viper VS Tzero Electric Car
http://www.buffaloschips.com/89uy.htm
Dog in Trance
http://www.buffaloschips.com/t43e.htm
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Peach Chips
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A young farmer was selling his peaches door to door.
He knocked at a door, and a shapely 30-something gorgeous lady
dressed in a very sheer negligee, answered the door.
He raised his basket to show her the peaches and asked, 'Would you
like to buy some peaches ?'
The shapely lady looked at him very sexily and very interested also
in his peaches.
She then pulled the top of her negligee to one side so that one of
her large breasts showed, and asked, ....'Are they as firm as this?'
He nodded his head and said, 'Yes ma'am,'' and a little tear came to
his eyes.
Then she pulled the other side of her negligee off asking, 'Are they
nice as these two?'
The young farmer said, Yes,' and another tear came to his other eye.
Then she unbuttoned the bottom of her negligee and asked, 'Are they
as fuzzy as this?'
He again said, 'Yes,' and broke down crying.
She asked, 'Why on earth are you crying?'
Drying his eyes he replied, ''The drought got my corn, the flood got
my soy beans, a tornado leveled my barn, and now... Now...It looks
like I'm gonna get screwed out of my peaches."
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Toon Chips
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camp tent feet
http://www.buffaloschips.com/kgdikgdg.htm
camping
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jfghdkgfd.htm
campus
http://www.buffaloschips.com/kgfjdkfgdf.htm
can of shut the fuck up
http://www.buffaloschips.com/mbncvbvc.htm
can you see my penis
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gnjckbcv.htm
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Limerick Chips
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There once was a weirdo named Cox
Who loved to sniff everyone's socks.
Said he: "Sure, it's stinky,
But don't call me kinky
I'll send you back home in a box!"
_____________________________________
Last Monday, a skipper named Keef
Ran his cruiser aground on a reef.
Tomorrow, he'll be
A lieutenant (jg),
And his Naval career will be brief!
_____________________________________
If the stuff in your stomach's askew,
And you think that you're going to spew,
Buck up and fight it,
Or you just might find,
That everyone barfs just like you.
Yer Hillbily friend in TN..
Ross
PROUD father of an American Soldier
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Parting Chips
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An 8 year old boy walks home from school each day past an 8-year-old
girl's house. One day as he is passing by, carrying a football, he
can't resist taunting the girl. He holds up the football and says,
"See this football? Football is a boys' game, and only boys can have
a football!" The little girl runs into the house and cries to her
Mom, "I want a football!" Being a woman of the 90's, her Mom runs
out and gets her one. The next day the girl is waiting for the
little boy as he rides up on his bike, she holds up the football and
sings... "Nah Na Nah Nah". The little boy angrily points to his bike
and says, "Oh yeah, well this is a boy's bike and only boys get
boys' bikes and you can't have one!" She runs to her Mom and the
next day she waits for him on her new boy's bike. The little boy
gets furious and pulls down his pants, and pointing to his most
private of parts says, "Look, only boys have these and your mom
can't buy you one!" The next day he walks by and says to her, "Well,
I guess I showed you!" to which she promptly pulls up her dress,
points to her parts and proclaims "My Mom tells me that as long as I
have one of these I can have as many of THOSE as I want!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 2007
The Dog Run, The Last Line of Defense
BJ, having tried everything to keep Sandi in, is
watching her behind a tree with a scope. So far
all is working well.
Sanid, having extreme eyesight and knowing
dad is watching and also knowing she is finally
trapped is resorting to her last tactic...
BJ: What is she doing?
Sandi: Howl......Howl...
BJ: Such a moan..such a pitiful sound.
She sounds like she is dying.
BJ walks up to the dog run and looks at Sandi.
Sandi's face is sad, her eyes red, her face droppy.
She has that, 'I can barely go on' look.
BJ opens the gate and Sandi wobbles out to dad and
lays at his feet, he pets her.... she jumps up and runs
around the yard full speed.
BJ: It was an act!
The herd
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Adult Adult
*********************************************
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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