Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
This is the address from the Easter Prayer Breakfast held at
the White House on April 19. The Easter Egg Roll will be
conducted Monday. I do prefer Reagan's Easter address more
gut it isn't a bad speech coming from a man who has been
accused of being everything but a Christian.. buffalo
Remarks by the President at Easter Prayer Breakfast
East Room
8:39 A.M. EDT
THE PRESIDENT: Thank you very much. Thank you. Please, please have a
seat.
Well, it is absolutely wonderful to be here with all of you today. I
see so many good friends all around the room.
Before I begin, I want to acknowledge one particular member of my
administration who I'm extraordinarily proud of and does not get much
credit, and that is USAID Administrator, Dr. Raj Shah, who is doing
great work with faith leaders. (Applause.) Where's Raj? Where is he?
There he is right there. Raj is doing great work with faith leaders on
our Feed the Future global hunger program, as well as on a host of other
issues. We could not be prouder of the work that he's doing. I also
want to acknowledge Congressman Mike McIntyre and his wife, Dee.
(Applause.) Mike -- as some of you know, obviously, North Carolina was
ravaged by storms this past weekend, and our thoughts and prayers are
with all the families who have been affected down there. I know that
Mike will be helping those communities rebuild after the devastation.
To all the faith leaders and the distinguished guests that are here
today, welcome to our second annual -- I'm going to make it annual, why
not? (Laughter and applause.) Our second Easter Prayer Breakfast. The
Easter Egg Roll, that's well established. (Laughter.) The Prayer
Breakfast we started last year, in part because it gave me a good excuse
to bring together people who have been such extraordinary influences in
my life and such great friends. And it gives me a chance to meet and
make some new friends here in the White House.
I wanted to host this breakfast for a simple reason -- because as busy
as we are, as many tasks as pile up, during this season, we are reminded
that there's something about the resurrection -- something about the
resurrection of our savior, Jesus Christ, that puts everything else in
perspective.
We all live in the hustle and bustle of our work. And everybody in this
room has weighty responsibilities, from leading churches and
denominations, to helping to administer important government programs,
to shaping our culture in various ways. And I admit that my plate has
been full as well. (Laughter.) The inbox keeps on accumulating.
(Laughter.)
But then comes Holy Week. The triumph of Palm Sunday. The humility of
Jesus washing the disciples' feet. His slow march up that hill, and the
pain and the scorn and the shame of the cross.
And we're reminded that in that moment, he took on the sins of the
world -- past, present and future -- and he extended to us that
unfathomable gift of grace and salvation through his death and
resurrection.
In the words of the book Isaiah: "But he was wounded for our
transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of
our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed."
This magnificent grace, this expansive grace, this "Amazing Grace" calls
me to reflect. And it calls me to pray. It calls me to ask God for
forgiveness for the times that I've not shown grace to others, those
times that I've fallen short. It calls me to praise God for the gift of
our son -- his Son and our Savior.
And that's why we have this breakfast. Because in the middle of
critical national debates, in the middle of our busy lives, we must
always make sure that we are keeping things in perspective. Children
help do that. (Laughter.) A strong spouse helps do that. But nothing
beats scripture and the reminder of the eternal.
So I'm honored that all of you have come here this Holy Week to join me
in a spirit of prayer, and I pray that our time here this morning will
strengthen us, both individually as believers and as Americans. And
with that, let me introduce my good friend, Bishop Vashti McKenzie, for
our opening prayer. (Applause.)
END
8:45 A.M. EDT
buffalo says I had three hard boiled eggs and I smell the ham cooking
and as I am doing this Jesus Christ Superstar is playing on the stereo.
You won't see much Easter humor here today as a lot of it detracts
from the gift Jesus gave the world. Enjoy the chips... buffalo
A Newsletter You may enjoy.
WnW_BigList
Adult orientated, Semi-Moderated humor list.
Filled with jokes and toons, pix n info, Basically anything but SPAM!
ABSOLUTELY NO GRAPHIC, KIDDIE or BESTALITY nudity ALLOWED
But toons of any nature are acceptable.
To access the home pages files n folders you must have a PROFILE
With a legal AGE of 18 or older!
We are a fun loving group, promising smiles and laughter for all!
Sign up today and see what we got!
Invite your friends as well, the more the merrier!
Visit group on web at:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WnW_BigList/
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please visit our Sponsor
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Extended Service no obligation quote.
Get the extra protection you and your family need on
the road right here:
http://buffaloschips.com/mtce
Cover most vehicle with less than 125,000 miles and
less than 10 years old.
Also includes:
- 24-Hour Roadside Assistance
- Car Rental Benefits.
- Trip Interruption Benefit.
- Extended Towing Benefits
Go here for details:
http://buffaloschips.com/mtce
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Blonde Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Three Blondes Explaining Easter
Three blondes died and found themselves standing before St. Peter. He
told them that before they could enter the Kingdom, they had to tell him
what Easter represented.
The first blonde, an American, said "Easter is a holiday where they have
a big feast and we give thanks and eat turkey."
St. Peter said, "Noooooo," and wouldn't let her in.
The second blonde, a Brit, said "Easter is when we celebrate Jesus's
birth and exchange gifts."
St. Peter said, "Noooooo," and he wouldn't let her in either.
The third blonde, a Canadian, said she knew what Easter was, and
St.Peter said, "So, tell me."
She said, "Easter is a Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish
festival of Passover. Jesus was having Passover feast with his disciples
when he was betrayed by Judas, and the Romans arrested him. The Romans
hung him on the cross and eventually he died. Then they buried him in a
tomb behind a very large boulder ... "
St. Peter said, "Verrrrrry good..."
Then the blonde continued, "Now, every year the Jews roll away the
boulder and Jesus comes out. If he sees his shadow, we have six more
weeks of hockey."
Amy
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
I can't believe...
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i032.html
oops
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i033.html
no sports on tv
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i034.html
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Abby Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What Everyman Dreams He Will Read in Dear Abby
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on
him.
A: Do it. Sperm can help you loose weight and gives a great glow to your
skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to perform
oral
sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing
to
do is to thank him by performing it twice a day. Then cook him a nice
meal.
******************************
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.
A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged. The
man
is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A night
out
chasing young single girls is a great stress relief and can foster a
more
peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can rekindle your
relationship better than the man being away for a day or two (it's a
great time to clean
the house too)! Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he
returns
to his stable home. The best thing to do when he gets home is for you
and
your best friend to perform oral sex on him. Then cook him a nice meal.
************************************
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.
A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess with
it, do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help. You may wish
to
videotape yourself while doing this, and present it to your husband as a
birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt, perform oral sex on him and
cook
him a delicious meal.
*********************************
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.
A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity
training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time consuming. Sex
should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for
foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as much as
you
should - he should never have to work to get you in the mood. Stop being
so
selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by performing oral sex on him
and cook him a nice meal.
**************************************
Dear Mr. Abby:
Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes
to sleep never giving me one.
A: I'm not sure I understand the problem.
Perhaps you've forgotten to cook him a nice meal.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
See Everything In High Definition Color And Clarity
HD Aviators are the fashionable new sunglasses featuring built in high
definition technology at a price everyone can afford. Now you'll be
able to protect your eyes while still getting the color, clarity and
high definition you want. Like no other glasses you have ever worn.
Limited time offer so act now.
Click the link below for more information:
http://buffaloschips.com/jklll
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Virgin Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jill, being the "only buy-on-sale shopper," beckoned
to a salesman in Bergdorf Goodman's, pointed to
white wool designer dress on a mannequin, and said,
"Hey Sonny boy, so how much is the dress on that
store dummy over there?"
"That dress is $899.95, Madam," sneered the rather
snotty salesman.
"Oh! For $99.95, I could get the same dress at
S. Klein's downtown!"
"But Madam," said the salesman, "You'll find that the
dress at Klein's is recycled wool. This original is
100% pure virgin wool."
And Jill replied, "So! For $800, I should be caring
what the lambs do at night?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tired of paying way too much for your ink and toner?
Then you're in luck, because at ClickInks we're obsessed with saving you
money! With our buy 2, get 1 free offer on select cartridges, free
shipping on orders over $49, and a 100% money back guarantee you've got
nothing to lose and EVERYTHING to gain!
Get an extra 10% off by entering "SAVINGS10" at checkout!
Just visit http://buffaloschips.com/clink to start saving!
We're looking forward to hearing from you!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Fart Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ART FART
It's such a beauty you want to immortalize it on canvas.
ARROGANT FART
When you think your farts don't stink.
ASSAULT FART
A sudden attack that shoots virtual flames out your arse.
TIRE FART
You can't control the blow out.
BEER FARTS
These come out of every 'can' and smell like warm beer.
JAIL FART
Been doing time inside you for quite awhile, and finally makes its
great escape.
DONKEY FART
Your ass is the only one that can do it.
GHOST FART
You can't hear it, you can't see it, and you can't smell it.
HOME ALONE FART
When you're home alone and a great one is wasted on no one.
SHOE FART
When you bend over to tie your shoe laces and one escapes.
TANK FART
When you refer to your farts as 'gas'.
OLD FART
You know how old it is by how bad it smells.
BRAIN FART
You need to fart, but nothing comes out.
ALZHEIMER FART
A confused fart that heads the wrong way, and becomes a burp.
NOT-ME FART
When you drop a bomb in a crowded elevator, turn around to the
person
behind you and give a disgusted look and whisper "PIG!"
U.F.O. FART
When someone farts in crowded room, label it as a "Unidentified Foul
Odor".
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
DISH Network Plans starting at $24.99/mo
Why would you ever pay more?
Get the best deal in TV!
12-months w/24 month agreement
Find out if your zip code qualifies for this special internet offer
http://buffaloschips.com/dnw
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In 2006 in an effort to reduce its overhead and increase its
profitability "for the well-being of our members," North Carolina's
Medicaid program had cut circumcision from its coverage. Not to
leave
anyone without choice, the North Carolina Mohel's Association
reportedly stepped in and offered to take care of any loose ends.
"When my husband finally gave in and began to clean out his dresser
drawers, he discovered a bunch of socks that didn't match. As I
looked at them, I noted that most of them had holes in them. "Land's
sakes, man !" I exclaimed. "How long have you had these things?"
"Since before we were married," he admitted. "I guess you could say
that I had a lot of premarital socks!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/My Lord's Love
http://silverandgoldandthee.com/Holiday2/MyLordsLove.html
Melva/Your Amazing Grace
http://silverandgoldandthee.com/Holiday2/ForMe.html
Melva/New Again
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/V/BP_SE.html
Rick w/ Easter Blessings
http://www.wtv-zone.com/Cruise_2000/rick/EasterBlessings.html
Marlene/ Old Rugged Cross/ Ernie Ford
http://www.wtv-zone.com/summerhoosier3/html1/OldRuggedCross.html
Rick w/~At The Cross For Me~The Easter Story~
http://www.wtv-zone.com/Cruise_2000/r/EasterStory.html
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Kate, a 42 year old mother of 3 had tried
every diet out there with only temporary success.
After losing weight on the HCG diet, she has kept
off the 45 pound weight loss for almost 4 YEARS!
She went from a size 14 to a size 3!
It's time to change your body.
It's time to take control of your weight
and feel amazing results!
See why everyone is clamoring to get their HCG order in.
HERE NOW!
http://buffaloschips.com/hcg
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Surfin Surfari
Egg Sculpture Art
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/egg.html
Who Is This Jesus?
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/jesus.html
Walk With Jesus
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/poems/walk.html
Saviour is Arisen
http://www.reflectionsofsouthbreeze.com/Pages/arisensavior.htm
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Hello,
We wanted to inform you today that you can now download a program
online that will allow you to watch unlimited television from around
the world right on your PC!
Press Here to watch TV from around the world on your PC:
http://buffaloschips.com/comptv
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Who Is Jesus Christ?
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/BibleStudy/whoisjesus.html
Bible: Our Valuable Anchor!
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/BibleStudy/ouranchor.html
Bible: Four Crucified With Christ!
http://tinyurl.com/3w8ftsv
http://www.reflectionsofsouthbreeze.com/Pages/MyThoughtsOfYou.htm
<A
href="http://www.reflectionsofsouthbreeze.com/Pages/MyThoughtsOfYou.htm">
AOL Link</A>
Graphics by Moon and Back Music by Margie Harrell
http://www.reflectionsofsouthbreeze.com/Pages/EasterJoy.htm
<A href="http://www.reflectionsofsouthbreeze.com/Pages/EasterJoy.htm">
AOL Link</A>
Graphics by Moon and Back Music by Margie Harrell
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Hi,
We would like to show you why you may be "fat" and why you're unable
to lose weight no matter how hard you try.
First off, please always know that it's not your fault...
Press here to see why you're fat:
http://buffaloschips.com/fat
After you see what the problem is, you will see how easy it is to
finally lose the fat that you want to lose.
Thank you!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Animal World
Melva/Powerful God
http://silverandgoldandthee.com/Insp/PowerfulGod.html
Melva/White As Snow
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/Insp/A/Wa.html
Melva/God So Loved The World
http://silverandgoldandthee.com/Holiday2/So_Lov.html
Melva/In The Shadow Of His Cross
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/Insp/Sha.html
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
We would like to know if you would be interested in working from
home in your spare time writing short articles for us. You will be
paid $25.00 - $45.00 per hour writing these articles.
We will also pay you $12.00 - $50.00 per hour for posing in blogs,
and up to $450 for each fiction or non fiction story we ask you to
write.
Press here if you are interested:
http://buffaloschips.com/fhwn
All my best,
Freelance Home Writers Network
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Movie Links
Topper
http://www.buffaloschips.com/62511.htm
Trained Puppies
http://www.buffaloschips.com/62512.htm
Tread Mill
http://www.buffaloschips.com/62513.htm
Tree Sex
http://www.buffaloschips.com/62514.htm
Trick Boobies
http://www.buffaloschips.com/62515.htm
Verrassing
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7801.htm
Water Power
http://www.buffaloschips.com/71008.htm
Way Cool Toy
http://www.buffaloschips.com/71009.htm
Wekker Problem
http://www.buffaloschips.com/71010.htm
Welcome Home
http://www.buffaloschips.com/71601.htm
Westfall Horse Video
http://www.buffaloschips.com/71602.htm
We Wish You A Merry Christmas
http://www.buffaloschips.com/71603.htm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cathy and I went to the Mardi Gras festivals to New Orleans for our
35th Anniversary. They had a nice room in a hotel just outside of
Bourbon Street. I couldn't sleep and decided to take a walk at 1 AM
the first night there. As I was cruising down Bourbon Street, I saw
a
skimpily dressed woman on a balcony above me. "Would you like to
sleep with me for $100," she called down to me. I told her, "Making
love at my age is always a real effort. But I could sure use the
money."
Hard to believe, but many of our customers at the bank
still don't know how to swipe their card through the ATM
card reader. Because of this, my fellow tellers and I
often find ourselves having to explain how it's done. One
teller complained that she kept getting odd looks every
time she explained it. I found out why when I overheard
her tell one man, "Strip down facing me."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chicken bj
http://www.buffaloschips.com/vhkcbjkclbc.htm
chili night
http://www.buffaloschips.com/bncvjbnkcvbvc.htm
chinese
http://www.buffaloschips.com/hkfjbhkfghgf.htm
chinese2
http://www.buffaloschips.com/nvcmkbncv,bv.htm
choir
http://www.buffaloschips.com/nvkbjkclg.htm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aluma Wallet - As Seen On TV!
The Aluminum Wallet!
Finally Fashion meets Function!
Buy 1 Get 1 FREE!
2 for Just $10.99!
Never worry about losing your valuables again!
Aluma Wallet Features:
Made of Die-Cast Aluminum Alloy
Ultra-Slim Outer Case
Waterproof to Keep your Valuables Dry
Compact Size is Great for both Men & Women
Nearly Indestructible!
Aluma Wallet is the Smart & Safe choice for both Men & Women!
Not Available in Stores an Online Exclusive!
Order Now:
http://buffaloschips.com/aluma
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There once was a girl named Madonna
To all the boys she asked, "Do ya wanna?"
Warren Beatty said no,
And called her a "Ho"
Now she cries and smokes marijuana.
There once was a man from Las Lever
Who had intercourse with a beaver;
The result of the fuck
was a canvas-back duck,
Two canoes and a golden retriever!
There was a young woman named Vicki
Who said, "I don't want to be picky.
If, in five hours or so
As you say, you must go,
At least we'll have time for a quickie."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rainbow Peppers - Grow 5 Different Colored Peppers on 1 Plant
You can enjoy Rainbow Peppers at any stage and experience all the
incredible sweet tastes of all the individual flavors. Make colorful and
flavorful meals with black, violet, yellow, orange and red peppers.
Why pay supermarket prices when you can grow delicious peppers on your
own. Each plant can produce up to 30 peppers.
Buy 3 Rainbow Pepper plants and get 3 Big Bertha plants on us.
Learn More
http://buffaloschips.com/rainpep
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My wife found out that our dog (a Schnauzer) could hardly hear, so she
took it to the veterinarian.
The vet found that the problem was hair in the dog's ears. He cleaned
both ears, and the dog could then hear fine.
The vet then proceeded to tell Andrea that, if she wanted to keep this
from recurring, she should go to the store get some "Nair" hair remover
and rub it in the dog's ears once a month.
Andrea went to the store and bought some "Nair" hair remover. At the
register, the pharmacist told her"If you're going to use this under your
arms, don't use deodorant for a few days."
Andrea said, "I'm not using it under my arms."
The pharmacist said, "If you're using it on your legs, don't use body
lotion for a couple of days."
Andrea replied, "I'm not using it on my legs either. If you must know,
I'm using it on my Schnauzer."
The pharmacist says, "Well, stay off your bicycle for about a week."
Randy
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tomato Giant - Super Size Your Tomatoes
Produce up to 180 lbs. of super size tomatoes for less than a penny a
piece. These tomato trees zoom to an amazing 8 feet or taller in just 90
days with tomatoes growing as big as grapefruits - up to 2 lbs each.
Order today and we'll give you 3 of our big early hybrid tomatoes as our
gift to you - just pay shipping and handling.
Super size your tomatoes today.
Order Now
http://buffaloschips.com/tomgi
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 2021
Wring Wring Wring
Ring Ring Ring
BJ: Hello.
Val: I cannot find Rudy.
BJ: I do not want to ask but where are you?
Val: Sioux City, I think it is close to Guthrie.
BJ: Why me, why me. I have run out of people to send.
Let me think. I will get Tami to come get you. Find a
motel 6 and she will be there as soon as possible okay?
Val: Where is Sioux City?
BJ: Iowa.
Val: Hmm. Where is Rudy?
BJ: Missouri.
Val: Where is Sandi?
BJ: New Mexico.
Val: Where is Katie?
BJ: Oklahoma.
Val: Where are you?
BJ: Texas.
Val: Ahh, this sounds a bit messy father, why are we in
five states?
BJ: Because we wanted to be together and we have done
the exact opposite thing.
The herd
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult
*********************************************
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
To unsubscribe send a blank e-mail to Buffalos-adult-jokes-unsubscribe@egroups.com
Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
No comments:
Post a Comment