THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
Do not anticipate trouble,
Or worry about what may
Never happen.
Keep in the sunlight.
–Benjamin Franklin
_________
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
I hope everyone had a great Christmas!
We did indeed, here at the home of
the postman clan! Good food, presents
galore, great stuffing stuffers. The
war department outdid her self in the
kitchen. She fixed us up a spread that
would be the envy of the Waldorf hotel.
I'll be eating leftovers for a couple days,
for sure. But thats ok. She centered the
feast around a Christmas ham. A Black forrest
that she'd picked up from Meijer, and also
home made mac and cheese. And of course all
the fixins that go with a great Christmas
dinner. I paid no attention to my dreaded
diet and pigged out to my hearts content.
And with all the leftover Christmas cookies
and candy from the stockings, I think I
shall be well stuffed way past the New year:)
Hope you all had a great xmas as well!
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
THE COMICS
an American invention
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g001.html
rubber duck
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g002.html
homeland security
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g003.html
a sale
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g004.html
nothing I can do
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g005.html
rescue mission
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g006.html
the smurfs
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g007.html
___________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Saturday night live
Dick in a box
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8713.html
on the certificate-wav file
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8714.html
this dude must be crazy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8715.html
the cat and the fan
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8716.html
smile
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8718.html
boob lift
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8719.html
Q. What do a Rubix cube and a penis have in common?
A. The longer you play with them, the harder they get.
Q. What does an old woman have between her breasts
that a young woman doesn't?
A. A navel.
Q. What is the difference between a woman and a washing
machine?
A. You can bung your load in a washing machine and it
won't call you a week later.
Q. Why did god create Adam before he created eve?
A. Because he didn't want anyone telling him how
to make Adam.
______________
Larry's barn burned down, and Susan, his wife,
called the insurance company ...
Susan: We had that barn insured for fifty thousand and
I want my money.
Agent: Whoa there just a minute, Susan; it doesn't work
quite like that.
We will ascertain the value of the old barn and provide
you with a new one of comparable worth.
Susan, after a pause: I'd like to cancel the policy
on my husband.
_____________
"Things That Sex And Parking Spaces Share In Common"
1. You should never have to wait to find one.
2. You should be able to slide right into one.
3. Spaces in the front are always the best.
4. When no front spaces are available, spaces in the
rear will always suffice
5. It sucks when someone else is double-parked.
6. Your space should still be open and waiting when
you get back
7. It's a tragedy when you have a 'full-size' car but
there are only 'compact' spaces.
____________
An old gentleman wearing a beat-up old leather flying
jacket sat down at the Starbucks and ordered a cup of
coffee. As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat
down next to him... She turned to the man and asked,
'Are you a real pilot?'
He replied, 'Well, I've spent my whole life flying;
biplanes, Cubs, Aeronca's, T-6s, flew in WWII in a B-25,
and later Sabre jets in the Korean conflict. I taught
50 people to fly and gave rides to hundreds, so yes,
I guess I am a pilot.'
She said, 'I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking
about naked women. As soon as I get up in the morning,
I think about naked women. When I shower, I think about
naked women. When I watch TV, I think about naked women.
It seems everything makes me think of naked women.'
The two sat sipping in silence.
A little while later, a young man sat down on the other
side of the old pilot and asked, 'Are you a real pilot?'
He replied, 'I always thought I was, but I just
found out I am a lesbian.'
____________
Jill: The guy I have been dating is talking about
getting married.
Mary: Wow! Well, if he does ask you, do not delay!
Say, "Yes!" right away!
Jill: What is the hurry?
Mary: Men have very short memories when it comes to that
subject. Sometimes they forget before you can even
get your clothes back on!
______________
A lawyer awoke in a hospital bed after a complicated
operation, and found that the curtains were drawn around him.
"Why are the curtains closed?" he asked. "Is it night?"
A nurse replied, "No, it is just that there is a fire
across the street, and we didn't want you waking up and
thinking that the operation was unsuccessful."
__________
BUFFALO BILL
3rd World Bomb Squad
http://www.buffaloschips.com/61627.htm
ICTV
http://www.buffaloschips.com/6241.htm
Leno Photo Booth
http://www.buffaloschips.com/6242.htm
__________
SYDESJOKES LIST
Farting In A Womens Toilet
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000551.html
Farting Preacher
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000552.html
Faryl Smith - Ava Maria
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000553.html
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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