Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
Sitting there thinking about New Year's resolutions?
Let me give you a hand.
Tired of making resolutions year after year that you never keep? Why
not promise to do something you can actually accomplish? Here are
some resolutions that you can use as a starting point:
1. Gain weight. At least 30 pounds.
2. Stop exercising. Waste of time.
3. Read less. Makes you think.
4. Watch more TV. You've been missing some good stuff.
5. Procrastinate more. Starting tomorrow.
6. Stop bringing lunch from home: Eat out more.
7. Get in a whole NEW rut!
8. Spend your summer vacation in Cyberspace.
9. Don't eat cloned meat.
10. Create loose ends.
11. Get more toys.
12. Get further in debt.
13. Don't believe politicians.
14. Break at least one traffic law.
15. Avoid airplanes that spontaneously drop 1000 feet.
16. Don't swim with piranhas or sharks.
17. Associate with even worse business clients.
18. Spread out priorities beyond ability to keep track of them.
19. Wait around for opportunity.
20. Focus on the faults of others.
21. Mope about faults.
22. Never make New Year's resolutions again.
Tomorrow night is amateur night when people who like to drink and
drive get arrested or hurt themselves or others. Professional
drinkers
know better and get a designated driver or call a cab. Be a Pro,
stay
alive.
Enjoy the chips... buffalo
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Football Chips
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A Cleveland family of football supporters head out one Saturday to
do their Christmas Shopping. While in the sports store, the son
picks up a Pittsburgh Steeler jersey and says to his older sister,
"I've decided to become a Steeler fan and I would like this for
Christmas."
His big sister is outraged by this and promptly whacks him round
the head and says, "Go talk with mom."
Off goes the little lad with the Pittsburgh Steeler jersey in hand
and finds his mother.
"Mom?"
"Yes, son?"
"I've decided I'm going to be a Pittsburgh Steeler fan, and I
would like this jersey for Christmas."
The mother is outraged, promptly whacks him around the head and
says,
"Go see your father."
Off he goes with the Pittsburgh Steeler jersey in hand and finds
his father.
"Dad?"
"Yes, son?"
"I've decided I'm going to be a Pittsburgh Steeler fan, and I
would like
this jersey for Christmas".
The father is so outraged he, too, whacks his son around the head
and says, " No son of mine is ever going to be seen in THAT!"
About half hour later they're all back in the car heading towards
home.
The father turns to the son and says, "Son, I hope you've learned
something today?"
The son says, "Yes, Dad, I have."
"Good, son. What is it?"
The son replies, " I've only been a Pittsburgh Steeler fan for an
hour
and I already hate you Cleveland bastards."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
how thoughtful
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g045.html
geology---
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g046.html
for crying out loud
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g047.html
Final Solution
http://www.sydesjokes.com/toons/link000654.html
Find Hole
http://www.sydesjokes.com/toons/link000655.html
Find Irritating
http://www.sydesjokes.com/toons/link000656.html
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Quickie Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What is the most intelligent animal in the world?
The dog.It will walk up to anything and smell of it.If he can't eat
it or mate with it, he will piss on it!
Californians are a strange people. They'll put every chemical known
to God and man up their nostrils, and then laugh at you for putting
sugar in your coffee!
Please call me by my new Muslim name.
Seldom Bin Laid
Between 15 and 99 a man is like Iraq - ruled by
a prick
Birds of a feather flock together...
and then they all crap on your car.
Q. Why is giving a Blow Job a win/lose situation?
A. He may have you on your knees, but you have him by the balls!
I'm not saying she's easy, but her pantyhose has a pet door.
Q: How did the blonde die while drinking milk?
A: The cow sat down!
Q. How do you know you've walked into a gay church service?
A. Only half the congregation are kneeling.
Christmas is weird. What other time of the year do you sit
in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?
Q. How come Santa and Mrs. Claus don't have children?
A. Santa spends all his time with elves and fairies.
Q: How did Mrs. Claus come to marry Santa?
A: She was Magnetically Attracted to his North Pole
The newest vitamin is made from chicken soup.
It makes men cocky and women lay better. <thanx Jim>
I'm not cheap, but I am on special this week. ;)~~~~~~~~~~
Amy
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Air Climber - Make Exercise Fun Again
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cardio, weight loss and tighter abs while you step on air. It's the
fun workout that uses air to eliminate impact, while still burning
the fat.
Lose 10 lbs or 10 inchs in 10 days guaranteed.
http://buffaloschips.com/aircl
View Web Version
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Drug Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Top 16 Signs a Radio Talk Show Host Is on Drugs
16. Takes phone calls only if the caller agrees to do a hit
of helium first.
15. Spent the last 15 minutes of yesterday's show clearing
his throat.
14. His response to every caller: "Dave's not here, man."
13. Cannot refer to Eli Lilly without adding the phrase
"makers of some mighty fine sh*t!"
12. "Microphones! There are microphones everywhere!"
11. Every call is screened through a rigorous "Are you a cop? You
sure? You gotta say so or else it's entrapment, man!" line of
questioning.
10. Claims he can do his show "with half my stash hidden under my
bed
just to make it fair."
9. While interviewing Barbara Bush, constantly refers to her son as
George Washington and adds how much "you two dudes look alike."
8. He's talking into an iced-tea spoon.
7. Ted Nugent cuts the interview short and advises the host
to "try decaf."
6. He's on a seven-second delay even when he's OFF the air.
5. Refuses to give out the show's telephone number because "The Man
can trace it, dude!"
4. Takes payola only in the form of Cool Ranch Doritos.
3. Calls for drastic retaliation against Arab states for their
nuking
of Arizona and the poisoning of President Palmer.
2. Can't stop giggling long enough to hear what "Dick in Buffalo"
has
to say.
1. Begins every news segment with: "First, let's go to my beeper for
a quick look at the traffic."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Inflatable Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Inflatable You
Your love for me is not debatable
Your sexual appetite is insatiable
You never ever make me waitable
Delectable, inflatable you.
You don't have problems with your weight at all
You never steal food off my plate at all
I never have to masturbate at all
Unstoppable, inflatable you.
You never seem to menstruate at all
So you're not angry when I'm late at all
I feel permanently felatable
Unpoppable, inflatable you.
With you in my arms I feel we could just fly away
With the right kind of gas I might even try it some day
In this ocean of life I'm never afraid we might drown
We could just float forever whatever the weather
Whenever my inflatable lover's around.
Your thighs and buttocks are so holdable
You always do what you are toldable
And if we argue you just foldable
Controllable consolable you.
My mates all reckon you are suitable
I took you round to watch the footable
And Steve and Gary said you're rootable
Commutable, refutable you.
You're never sensitive or tickley
When I rub you my skin goes prickerly
It's know an static electricity
Felicity when I'm kissing you.
Your skin is so smooth - I couldn't afford you with hair
You have all the holes real girls have got plus one for the air
Your problems are simple, I don't need my Masters in Psych
To know if you get down I just perk you right up
With a couple of squirts from the pump off my bike.
You never wake up when I snore at all
A trait which I find quite adorable
You have a box and you are storable
Ignorable, back-doorable you.
Any sexual position's feasible
Although you don't bend at the knees at all
Your hooters are so firm and squeezable
Increasable, un-creasable you.
You don't complain about my hairy back
Or about the inches that downstairs I lack
You're not disgusted by my furry crack
Burt Bacharach, Jack Kerouac ooo.
Now birth control is not an issue
I clean it all up with a tissue
I bet my jealous friend all wish you
Were insatiably inflatably theirs.
Don't let me down.
Don't let me down.
Don't let me down.
And I won't let you down.
Tim Minchin 2003
Via Amy
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Now YOU can afford to Travel too!
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*See Hotwire Travel Ticker website for details.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Texan Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
THE TEXAN TEST
1) Which of the following foods should be fried?
a) all foods
b) all foods
c) all foods
d) all foods
2) If you divorce your wife, is she still your sister?
True
False
3) What is 8 + 3 ?
a) what?
b) the number of people living in your trailer home
c) fertilizer
d) The number eight, Jesus, and the number three
4) I will cheat on my husband...
a) for a quart of Schlitz
b) not for all the chewing tobacco in the world
c) because he cheats on our daughter
d) if he doesn't give me back my bowling glove
5) I wash my underwear when...
a) I go swimming with it on
b) I wash my truck
c) it gets brittle
d) it rains
6) I brush my teeth when...
a) I wash my truck
b) they bleed
c) it rains
d) Never. I don't have teeth
7) How many cars and/or trucks are parked in your yard?
a) 15-20
b) 21-25
c) 26-30
d) beer
8) My favorite book is...
a) TV Guide
b) Jaws
c) Bob Barker's Bio
d) What is a book?
9) Country music is so great because...
a) it makes me cry
b) it goes good with fried food
c) they play it at all our favorite truck stops
d) Black people can't dance to it
10) Nothing is more intellectually stimulating than...
a) Oprah
b) okra
c) a V8 engine
d) greased up goats
11) Cholesterol is...
a) monster truck fuel
b) a laxative
c) a communist effort to overthrow Texas
d) don't know
12) Complete the sentence: "That ole boy
a) is slipperier than snot on a door knob."
b) is tougher than prison bacon."
c) is uglier than a mud fence."
d) is one little fork short of a fondue party"
13) Women should...
a) never clean house unless they're naked
b) put gravy on everything
c) cost less
d) bait their own hook
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TAME YOUR SHOES!
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Stop digging through that pile of stinky shoes just to find a
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- Protects and organizes
- Saves valuable closet space
- Store almost anywhere
http://buffaloschips.com/under
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Celebrity Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mean Celebrity Quotes
I have more talent in my smallest fart than you have in your entire
body. - - - Walter Matthau (to Barbra
Steisand)
She has discovered the secret of perpetual middle age. - - -
Oscar Levant (about Zsa Zsa Gabor)
She not only worships the golden calf, she barbecues it for lunch.
- - - Oscar Levant (about Zsa Zsa Gabor)
You can calculate Zsa Zsa Gabor's age by the rings on her fingers.
- - - Bob Hope
Zsa Zsa Gabor has been married so many times she has rice marks
on her face. - - - Henny Youngman
She ran the whole gamut of emotions from A to B. - - - Dorothy
Parker (about Katharine Hepburn)
Every minute this broad spends outside of bed is a waste of time.
- - - Michael Todd (about Elizabeth Taylor)
Dramatic art in her opinion is knowing how to fill a sweater.
- - - Bette Davis (about Jayne Mansfield)
Hah! I always knew Frank would end up in bed with a boy! - - -
Ava Gardner (about Mia Farrow's marriage to Frank Sinatra)
It's a new low for actresses when you have to wonder what's
between her ears instead of her legs. - - - Katharine Hepburn
(about Sharon Stone)
Maybe it's the hair. Maybe it's the teeth. Maybe it's the
intellect. No, it's the hair. - - - Tom Shales (about Farrah
Fawcett)
Miss United Dairies herself. - - - David Niven (about Jayne
Mansfield)
She looks like she combs her hair with an eggbeater. - - -
Louella Parsons (about Joan Collins)
She speaks five languages and can't act in any of them. - - -
John Gielgud (about Ingrid Bergman)
The Russians love Brooke Shields because her eyebrows remind them
of Leonid Brezhnev. - - - Robin Williams
The worst and most homeliest thing to hit the screens since Liza
Minelli. - - - John Simon (about Shelley Duvall)
Whatever it was that this actress never had, she still hasn't
got it. - - - Bosley Crowther (about Loretta Young)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Prevent pet accidents in your home with Pet Zoom Pet Park. It's made
of a synthetic grass like surface that prevents stains and rinses
clean in seconds. Unlike dripping newspapers and expensive wee wee
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Use it for training puppies to special needs dogs to long days at
the office.
Protect your upholstery and flooring with Pet Zoom Pet Park.
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/She's So Fine
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/F_S/So.html
Marlene/An Irish Blessing
http://summerhoosier.250free.com/HTML3/Irish-Blessing.html
John w/ Happy New Year 2010
http://heavens-gates.com/happynewyear/
From Kathryn/New Year Blessings
http://adreamandasmile.com/Occ/NY_Blessings2.html
Dreams
http://www.carolspoetry.com/carol04.html
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Now It's Your Turn To SCOOP UP some cash.
Wireless companies have accidentally stumbled and "opened up" an
impressive income opportunity to grab during the worst economy we've
seen in over 50 years.
And here's everything they don't want you to know...
http://buffaloschips.com/scoop
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Surfin Surfari
Drink Responsibly
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/drink.html
Whistles & Calliopes | steamboats.org Via Dianne
http://tinyurl.com/yf2p69m
Cleaning Tips Via Dianne
http://www.howtocleanstuff.net/
drive pricing - gas cost and trip calculator
http://www.drivepricing.com/
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Okay, everyone is telling me that I'm an insane millionaire who must
have gone absolutely crazy for doing this today and tomorrow,
especially on Thankgiving of all days, but I don't care anymore
because I think it's just the right thing to do.
Okay, let me catch my breathe while I type this because you're not
going to believe this...First off, thank you so much for taking a
minute to read this, my name is Justin Blake, and I'm a millionaire
that was dared to do something insane tonight and tomorrow morning,
and if you're interested in knowing what it is then read below, but
you'll need to hurry because you may only have a few minutes to take
advantage of this:
As part of an insane marketing test, I'm giving away my Online
Business Kit, but I'm only giving it away this today and tomorrow
morning.....so you need to get your copy today if you want one.
Press here to get your copy:
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Scams
http://www.fbi.gov/cyberinvest/escams.htm
Hard Drive Scan
http://www.fatguyutilities.com/workwin/useutils/hdd_chk.html
My Memorizer Via Dianne
http://www.mymemorizer.com/
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Listen, you will have no one but yourself to blame if you don't go
on an intimate date this weekend with a beautiful single woman or
man! NO ONE BUT YOURSELF TO BLAME!!!
Why will we blame you? Because we are giving away memberships to our
ADULTS ONLY dating community this week....and you can get one right
now for no cost...but we will not be giving them away forever.
PRESS HERE to meet single women or men this week for an intimate
date:
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Animal World
Doggie Zone
http://www.baddogs.com/index.cfm
Kitty Korner
http://www.angelfire.com/me4/tugby/PitifulMe1.jpg
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
We understand that you may have accidentally deleted important
documents, pictures, or other various files from your computer that
you thought you could never get back.
Well, we wanted to let you know that you can easily get your deleted
pictures, documents, or files back today using a program called File
R/D.
You can easily try File R/D right now, for no cost, to run a -free-
analysis scan that will allow you to view deleted pictures, files,
documents, etc... Once you have complete the -free- analysis scan
you will be amazed by what you see! In fact, you will even see what
other people have deleted from your computer.
Once the scanning is complete you will have full control over which
files you want to recover.
Press here to run the -free- analysis scan:
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Here is some more information about this new way to watch
television:
1) All of the programming is uncensored!
2) There are hundreds of channels from around the world to watch!
And new channels are added every day!
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Movie Links
Walk It Out Granny
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7808.htm
Water Park Prank
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7809.htm
wdrb
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7810.htm
We Need This Here
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7811.htm
What Every Man Wants In Bed
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7812.htm
WHAT_HAPPENS_IN_SEAWORLD_STAYS_THERE
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7813.htm
What The Hells That
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7814.htm
Why I Go To Weddings
http://www.buffaloschips.com/71609.htm
Why Buy Expensive Toys
http://www.buffaloschips.com/71610.htm
Why Girls Shouldn't Fire Handguns
http://www.buffaloschips.com/72101.htm
Why I Didn't Make The Olymics
http://www.buffaloschips.com/72102.htm
Why I Don't Fish
http://www.buffaloschips.com/72103.htm
Why I Was Never Late For School
http://www.buffaloschips.com/72104.htm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Navy Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dave the sailor docked at New York after a frustrating three-month
voyage. Unfortunately he'd lost most of his pay playing poker on
board ship, so when he eventually found a lady of the night all he
could offer her was 50 cents and a pair of sneakers.
She refused with disdain.
He wandered around in search of a more accommodating girl, but was
refused time and time again.
Eventually he found a more sympathetic lady who told him that
although she could not possibly accept his offer herself, he could
always try Mabel down the road. But she warned him not to expect too
much as Mabel was very unresponsive and would probably just lie
there
passively.
He found Mabel and as times were hard she reluctantly agreed to
accept the 50 cents and the pair of sneakers for her services, but
told him not to expect any kind of response from her.
Dave began the amorous act and after a few minutes was pleased to
find an arm reaching around his back. This was followed shortly
after
by a leg curling round his rear. Dave, who had always fancied
himself
a bit of a Romeo, gasped, "I knew you wouldn't be able to resist my
charms."
"Don't flatter yourself lover boy," answered Mabel, "I'm just trying
on the sneakers."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Home Smart Power Dock
Say goodbye to counter clutter forever with Power Dock. Keep your
cell phone, charger, music player and more without any tangling.
Hooks are also attached for hanging keys. Stay organized, charged
and ready to go whenever, wherever - from your home to your office.
Order today and we'll double the offer.
View Web Version
http://buffaloschips.com/charg
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
choke
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jghjfdkgf.htm
choke the chicken
http://www.buffaloschips.com/ghnkfgjdf.htm
choking
http://www.buffaloschips.com/dfhsjdkfhds.htm
choking hazard
http://www.buffaloschips.com/kdfgjldgdf.htm
christmas
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gjdkfgjfdl.htm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Emery Cat is The Fun New Kitty Scratcher That Actually Grooms
Cats Claws While They Play! The secret is the patented honeycomb
surface that works like a nail file, gently filing away sharpness.
Your package includes:
Durable Base with built in catnip
Cute, playful kitty toy
Packet of catnip
Bonus De-shedder
Buy 1 get 1 FREE Now for only $19.95 plus you'll receive the Bonus
Gift absolutely FREE!
http://buffaloschips.com/emery
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There was a young fellow named Tucker
Who, instructing a novice cock-sucker,
Said, "Don't bow out your lips
Like an elephant's hips,
The boys like it best when they pucker."
There was a young lady called Harris,
That nothing could ever embarrass;
Till the bath-salts one day
In the tub where she lay
Turned out to be plaster of paris.
There was a young dolly named Molly
Who thought that to frig was folly.
Said she, "Your pee-pee
Means nothing to me,
But I'll do it just to be jolly."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mini Sewing Machine
Mini Sew-Wonder is the new cordless sewing machine. It's as powerful
as a full size machine, but lightweight, battery/AC adapter powered
and can be used right out of the box. Forget the hassle of ordinary
sewing machines that can be bulky and heavy.
Get the job done with Mini Sew-Wonder.
View Web Version
http://buffaloschips.com/sewmac
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
New Year's Resolutions For Him & Her [Him (Y) / Her (X)]
X - Lose weight / Go on a diet / Drink more water
Y - One case beer per weekend (unless having guys over or
Superbowl weekend)
X - ONLY - one chocolate bar per week
Y - ONLY - three nights at topless bar per week
X - Workout - Jog/Step Bench 5 times week
Y - Move furniture to find lost little black book and bedroom
TV remote
X - Subscribe to Shape/Fitness Magazine
Y - Call 1-800 number to get on Victoria's Secret catalog mailing
list
X - Go on romantic second date with Bob/Accounting
Y - Score on second date with Suzy/Marketing
X - Get organized/clean house
Y - Give old Penthouse mags to Goodwill (or younger brother)
X - Buy new Daily Planner
Y - Buy new little Black Book if no luck under furniture
X - Find out name of tall good-looking guy in Finance
Y - Score with tall, long-legged Blond in Finance
X - Read More / Less TV
Y - Buy Dish - More sports channels!!
X - Watch quality TV with positive messages
Y - When surfing DO NOT stop on "Allie McBeal" -EVER
X - Plan budget / Save more money
Y - Only three nights at topless bar per week
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dryer Maid Dryer Ball
Get rid of pet hair from clothes, sheets and towels while they
tumble in your dryer. The Dryer Maid is like thousands of tiny lint
brushes in every load of laundry and it automatically releases it
into your lint trap for quick disposal.
Save money and time for only $14.99 + S&H.
View Website
http://buffaloschips.com/dryball
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
One day, when Little Johnny was about 6 years old, he and his father
went to look at some puppies. When he came home, he ran up to his
mom
and informed her that there were four puppies. 3 were boys and 1 was
a girl.
His mother was impressed and asked Little Johnny how he knew this.
"Well," says Little Johnny "The girl was brown colored, but all the
boys were black."
"Yes, dear, but how did the color tell you if they were male or
female?" asked his mother.
Exasperated, Little Johnny retorted, "The color doesn't tell you,
stupid, the black ones had cocks."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Tushee Comforter is the alternative to just placing a towel on
any chair, bench, or pool lounger. It protects against dirt, sweat,
and heat, while never falling off or blowing away. The Tushee forms
a secure pocket over any seat and can be adjusted to any width or
length to offer a soft comfortable seat. Relax and look stylish on a
soft plush Velour surface that provides real comfort. Plus, the
personalization makes it a pleasant surprise gift for him or her.
Throw away those chair covers! Put down a TUSHEE. The multipurpose,
adjustable, soft secure pocket that fits over any seat. Now you can
add a soft, 100% cotton Terry Lounge Cover, to any seat for extra
lounging comfort. Act now and take advantage of the Tushee 2X offer.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Birthday
Diana is at work and the phone rings...Ring Ring!
Diana: Hello!
Sandi: Diana?
Diana: Oh hello Sandi. How are you doing?
Sandi: I am doing fine. Thank you for asking.
Diana: What can I do for you?
Sandi: Well you know we are celebrating father's birthday and
things are a teensy bit out of hand.
Diana: What do you mean?
Sandi: Remember the large barrel Rudy brought into the house last
night?
Diana: Yes.
Sandi: Well it was a keg of beer. Katie, Rudy, Muffin and Miss
Kitty have been drinking to Dad's health all day.
Diana: And Dad, err I mean BJ?
Sandi: Not a drink. When the police arrived....
Diana: Police?
Sandi: Oh I didn't mention the police?
Diana: No you didn't.
Sandi: Well I think the neighbors complained about the noise.
Diana: Noise?
Sandi: Rudy on bagpipes, Katie on banjos, Muffin on Tuba, and Miss
Kitty on Drums. They were not too bad, except they were all playing
different songs.
To be continued
The herd in Guthrie
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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