THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
The happiness of your life depends on
the quality of your thoughts.
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
It is a cold and blistery morning here in our little
corner of West Michigan. Snow accumulation has perhaps
not been as heavy as they predicted, but it is definitely
white outs and temperatures dropping to frigid levels.
I felt bad for the war department as she got up for
another day of work. I know she didn't want to go in. I
gave her a hug and a smooch as she headed out the door.
I reminded her that there are about 16 million Americans
out there who wished they were going to work like her.
"Keep a stiff upper lip, girl." I advised.
And out the door she went.
(And I promptly headed back upstairs and went back to
sleep.)
We do hope you enjoy today's issues
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
I told you
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d030.html
bastard
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d031.html
fruitcake
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d032.html
problems
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d033.html
holiday tip
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d034.html
peace on earth?
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d035.html
don't shake it
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d036.html
live sex show
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d037.html
all I wanted
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d038.html
how did the doctor know?
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d039.html
__________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Happy Tree Friends
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8618.html
wiggles
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8619.html
the pole
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8620.html
touch down
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8621.html
monkey cage prank
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8622.html
holiday juggler
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8623.html
A young kid's in a shipwreck and he winds up stranded
on a tropical island. For twenty years he never sees
another human being. Then one day a beautiful girl with
long blond hair, her clothes half-ripped off, washes
up on a piece of driftwood. He explains to her how he
existed for twenty years, digging for clams, and
eating fruits and berries. She says, "Well, what did
you do for love?" He says, "Love? What's that?" She
says, "I'll show you." She shows him. Then she shows
him again. Then she shows him one more time. When
they're finally done, she says, "Well, how do you
like love?" He says, "It's great. But look what you
did to my clam digger."
_____________
'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house
Everybody felt shitty -- even the mouse.
Mom at the Whorehouse and Dad smoking grass;
I'd just settled down for a nice piece of ass.
When out on the lawn I heard such a clatter
I sprung from my piece to see what the matter
Then out on the lawn I saw a big dick
I knew in a moment: it must be Saint Nick.
He came down the chimney like a bat out of hell
I knew in a moment the fat fucker fell.
He filled all our stockings with pretzels and beer
And a big rubber dick for my brother the queer.
He rose up the chimney with a thunderous fart
The son of a bitch blew the chimeny apart,
He swore and he cursed as he rode out of sight
"Piss on you all and have a hell of a night!"
____________
A husband and wife want to take golf lessons from a
pro at a local country club. The man and woman meet
the pro and head onto the driving range. The man
goes up to hit first. He swings and hits the ball
100 yards. The golf pro says, "Not bad, but now hold
the club as firmly as you hold your wife's hooters."
The man follows the instructions and hits the ball
300 yards! The golf pro shouts out, "Excellent!"
Now the woman takes her turn. Her ball skoots 30 yards.
The golf pro says, "Not bad, but now try holding
the club like you hold your husband's cock."
She swings and the ball dribbles but 10 yards.
"Not bad," says the golf pro, "But now try taking
the club out of your mouth to hit the ball."
__________
What is a Cat?
1. Cats do what they want.
2. They rarely listen to you.
3. They're totally unpredictable.
4. When you want to play, they want to be alone.
5. When you want to be alone, they want to play.
6. They expect you to cater to their every whim.
7. They're moody.
8. They leave hair everywhere.
CONCLUSION:
They're tiny women in little fur coats.
____________
Mrs Murphy was chatting over the back yard fence
to Mrs O'Brien "Did you hear Mrs Flynn's husband
passed away last night?" "No!," said Mrs O'Brien,
"was it the cancer?" "Oh no," said Mrs Murphy,
"it wasn't anything that serious."
_____________
BUFFALO BILL
Perception
http://www.buffaloschips.com/lkj89.htm
Person Of The Week
http://www.buffaloschips.com/ksdaa.htm
Puppy VS Mirror
http://www.buffaloschips.com/sjdskjd.htm
________
Darkness Reborn RPG
http://tinyurl.com/dxys9n
Christmas Bear Name Generator
http://tinyurl.com/ykm89qc
Easy Meal in Africa
http://tinyurl.com/8grael
____________
SYDESJOKES LIST
Eddie Izzard - Ich Bin Ein Berliner
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000512.html
Eddie Izzard - Learning French
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000513.html
Egg Billiard
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000514.html
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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