Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
Hello, Everyone.
After a week of worrying and trying to get Yahoo's servers to
work properly, their engineers have reestablished service to
all of the readers of the chips It is easy to point at a problem
and ask to have it fixed, it is another thing to find it in a jungle
of servers with a 100 million users. As a personal point it
made me feel good to see all of you actually notice that I wasn't
arriving every morning.
I have a doctor's appointment this morning and he probably isn't
happy with me. It has been about 75 days since I was in their last
and he wanted to see me after 6 weeks which was a stretch even
then.
Yep he was unhappy and is dreaming up all sorts of tests to put me
through including that miserable chemical stress test again and this
is all over the minute amount of blood in my urine. I lose less that
way
than from all the blood test they take over a year but they never
worry
about that and judging by the number of checks on the lab order
for next Monday they will probably will be taking a pint or so heh
heh.
Then I am scheduled for an ultrasound of my kidneys right before
Christmas which isn't bad and then an IVP after that. If I remember
correctly you had to drink a couple bottles of Yuck before that one
and then a trip through the cat scan. I feel better than I have
since
the plant closure and that's what worries me. When I was in the Navy
they converted from black oil to something similar to fuel oil. It
had
less lubricating ability than the old stuff and the fuel pumps
failed
several times a year except for one. It had run for five years
without
failure and when we went into overhaul we had to tear it down for an
inspection. When they opened the pump the bearings fell apart and
the pump had to be replaced. Sometimes I feel like if they do too
much poking and prodding I might fall apart too.
Enjoy the chips... buffalo
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two pals from the army meet in the street:
-HI! We haven't seen each other so long, what's up?
-I got married, you know.
-That's great, we've got to celebrate that somehow. Come to my place
tonight so we'll have a small orgy.
-Well, how many people are gonna be there?
-If you come with your wife - three.
-HI! We haven't seen each other a long time, what's up?
-I got married.
-So? How is it? Better?
-Better? - I don't think so, but more often - for sure.
Two lovers play seek & hide.
-If you find me, I'm yours...
-What if I don't find you?
-I'm in the closet.
Little Johnny has just been toilet trained and decides to use the
big
toilet like his daddy. He pushes up the seat and balances his little
penis on the rim. Just then the toilet seat slams down, and little
Johnny lets out a scream.
His mother comes running to find Johnny hopping round the room
clutching his genitals and howling.
He looks up at her with his little tear stained face and sniffles,
"K-k-k-k-kiss {sniff} it better."
Little Johnny's mother shouts, "Don't start your father's shit with
me!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
details
http://www.thepostm
keep off the ice
http://www.thepostm
intelligent
http://www.thepostm
Electric Fence
http://sydesjokes.
Elephant Ass Accident
http://sydesjokes.
Elevator
http://sydesjokes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Navy Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jim was just out of Navy boot camp, and was on his first
ship. About two hours out of port, he began to get a bit
ill from the motion of the ship. He approached an ensign,
also just out of training and on his first cruise. He
saluted and said, "Excuse me sir, I am feeling seasick,
and I wondered if I may have permission to go downstairs
to the dispensary."
The ensign returned his salute and replied, "Sailor, you
are in the Navy now. You don't go downstairs, you go below!
There is no dispensary on this ship, there is sickbay. Not
only that, that is not the floor, it is a deck, that is not
the ceiling, it is the overhead, that is not a pillar, it is
a stanchion, that is not a water fountain, it is a scuttle-
butt. If I ever hear you using civilian words instead of
Naval jargon, I till throw you out of that little round
window over there."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Get Strong, Sculpted Arms and Shoulders
The Shake Weight is the revolutionary new way to shape and tone your
arms, and it is designed specifically for women. Scientific studies
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Additional Ordering Details:
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Random Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
There once was a male prostitute so popular that he had to hire a
secretary and a public relations director. Thereafter, whenever a
woman called him, his staff rose to the occasion.
Never play strip poker with a nudist, they have nothing to lose.
It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't
have
the balls to do it.
"I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own. (Woody
Allen)
I'm living with a girl but we're not married. Its kinda like leasing
with an option to buy.
The masochist couldn't answer the phone because he was tied up.
He: "How many beers does it take to make you dizzy?"
She: "About four or five, and don't call me dizzy."
What's the difference between sin and shame?
It is a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out.
What should you do if a elephant comes in your window?
Learn to swim.
What do you call boobs on a girl scout?
Brownie points
Why do women prefer old gynecologists?
They have shaky hands!
Why is it impossible for a woman to find a man who is caring,
sensitive, and also good-looking?
All those men already have boyfriends.
Stan Kegel
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Gorgeous Glass Teapot
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Membership in tea club
Bonus 2 FREE cool to the touch Tea Cups
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q and A Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
ALL THAT IS REQUIRED IS TO PASS YOUR PHYSICAL !
When his son refused to get a job, his father insisted he join the
Marines.
At the induction physical, the doctor directed the reluctant naked
recruit to read the eye chart across the room.
"What chart?" the young man asked.
"The one on the wall!" The doctor said."What wall?
Sensing he had a deadbeat on his hands, the doctor asked his
beautiful nurse to walk in naked.
"What do you see now?"
"Nothing."
"Well, you may not see anything," the doctor said, "but
your 'indicator' is pointing toward Paris Island !
Welcome to the Marine Corps, son
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Fun Slides Carpet Skates
Wherever there's carpet, blast off with Fun Slides. They let you
have fun while getting exercise indoors. Because they're one size
fits all and loved by kids of all ages, they make a great gift. Fun
Slides come in six fun colors.
Buy one pair and we'll throw in a second pair at no charge.
View Web Version
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Pee Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
There was a businessman, and he was not feeling well, so he went to
see
the doctor about it. The doctor says to him, "Well, it must be your
diet.
What sort of greens do you eat?"
The man replies, "Well, actually, I only eat peas, I hate all other
green
foods."
The doctor was quite shocked at this and says, "Well man, that's
your
problem, all those peas will be clogging up your system, you'll have
to
give them up!!"
The guy says, "But for how long? I mean I really like peas!"
The doctor replies, "Forever, I'm afraid."
The man is quite shocked by this, but he gives it a go and sure
enough,
his condition improves, so he realizes that he will never eat a pea
again. Anyway, one night, years later, he's at a convention for his
employer and getting quite sloshed, and one of the reps says, "Well,
ashully, I'd love a cigarette, coz I avint ad a smoke in four years,
I gave it up."
Quite a shocker really, and the barman goes, "Really, I haven't had
a
game of golf in 3 years, because it cost me my first marriage, so I
gave it up!"
The businessman says, "Thas nuvving, I haven't ad a pea in 6 years."
The barman jumps up screaming, "Okay, everyone who can't swim, grab
a table..."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Tushee Comforter is the alternative to just placing a towel on
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a secure pocket over any seat and can be adjusted to any width or
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Throw away those chair covers! Put down a TUSHEE. The multipurpose,
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add a soft, 100% cotton Terry Lounge Cover, to any seat for extra
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http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hearing Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
At the senior citizens luncheon, an elderly gentleman and
an elderly lady struck up a conversation and discovered that
they both loved to fish. Since both of them were widowed,
they decided to go fishing together the next day.
The gentleman picked the lady up and they headed to the river
to his fishing boat and started out on their adventure.
They were riding along, when they came upon a fork in the river
and the gentleman asked, "Do you want to go up or down?"
All of a sudden, the lady stripped off her shirt and pants
and made mad passionate love to the man right there in the boat.
When they finished, the man couldn't believe what had just
happened, but he had experienced the best sex that he'd had in
years.
They fished for a while and then continued riding along, when
soon they came upon another fork in the river. He asked the lady,
"Do
you
want to go up or down?" There she went again, stripping off her
clothes
to
make wild, passionate love to him again. This really impressed the
old
gentleman, so he asked her to go fishing again the next day.
She said yes, and so there they were the next day riding in the
boat, when they came upon the fork in the river. The gentleman
asked,
"Well, do you want to go up or down?"
The woman replied, "Down."
A little puzzled, the gentleman drove the boat down the river,
when he came upon another fork. He asked the lady,
"Do you want to go up or down?"
She replied, "Up."
This really confused the gentleman, so he asked "What's the deal?
Yesterday, every time I asked you if you wanted to go up or down,
you made passionate love to me. Now today, nothing."
She replied, "Well, yesterday I didn't have my hearing aid in,
and I thought you were saying, 'F*ck or drown!'"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Introducing the razor-sharp, feather-light ceramic slicing knife.
Unlike steel knife blades, YoshiBlade stay razor sharp. In fact,
this space-age material is so hard that professional chefs use
ceramic to sharpen their steel knives.
Say goodbye to old fashioned steel knives.
As a bonus you'll get the Ceramic Potato Peeler.
View Web Version
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/The Joy Of Christmas
http://silverandgol
Carolyn w/I Tan't Wait Till Quithmuth Day~ Mel Blanc
http://carolynsprec
John w/ Silent Night
http://heavens-
Amazing Grace
http://www.shangral
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Now It's Your Turn To SCOOP UP some cash.
Wireless companies have accidentally stumbled and "opened up" an
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And here's everything they don't want you to know...
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Surfin Surfari
Redneck Playstation via Wesley
http://tinyurl.
NOAA's National Weather Service - Graphical Forecast Via Dianne
http://www.weather.
Ugly Christmas Lights
http://www.uglychri
Snowman Name
http://www.quizopol
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Okay, everyone is telling me that I'm an insane millionaire who must
have gone absolutely crazy for doing this today and tomorrow,
especially on Thankgiving of all days, but I don't care anymore
because I think it's just the right thing to do.
Okay, let me catch my breathe while I type this because you're not
going to believe this...First off, thank you so much for taking a
minute to read this, my name is Justin Blake, and I'm a millionaire
that was dared to do something insane tonight and tomorrow morning,
and if you're interested in knowing what it is then read below, but
you'll need to hurry because you may only have a few minutes to take
advantage of this:
As part of an insane marketing test, I'm giving away my Online
Business Kit, but I'm only giving it away this today and tomorrow
morning.....
Press here to get your copy:
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
7-Zip
http://download.
Guard Your Online Privacy With TrackerWatcher Firefox Addon Via
Wesley
http://tinyurl.
French army sides with Mozilla in Microsoft email war Via Wesley
http://tinyurl.
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Listen, you will have no one but yourself to blame if you don't go
on an intimate date this weekend with a beautiful single woman or
man! NO ONE BUT YOURSELF TO BLAME!!!
Why will we blame you? Because we are giving away memberships to our
ADULTS ONLY dating community this week....and you can get one right
now for no cost...but we will not be giving them away forever.
PRESS HERE to meet single women or men this week for an intimate
date:
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*+*+*+*+*+*+
Animal World
Doggie Zone Via Dianne
http://www.pupforum
Wild Macaws
http://freespace.
Winter Hummingbirds of Southwest Louisiana
http://members.
World of Birding
http://www.worldbir
*+*+*+*+*+*+
We understand that you may have accidentally deleted important
documents, pictures, or other various files from your computer that
you thought you could never get back.
Well, we wanted to let you know that you can easily get your deleted
pictures, documents, or files back today using a program called File
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You can easily try File R/D right now, for no cost, to run a -free-
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you will be amazed by what you see! In fact, you will even see what
other people have deleted from your computer.
Once the scanning is complete you will have full control over which
files you want to recover.
Press here to run the -free- analysis scan:
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Here is some more information about this new way to watch
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1) All of the programming is uncensored!
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6) You won't have to pay a cable or satellite bill any longer!
Press Here For More Information and To Download Now:
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Movie Links
Kind Of Scary
http://www.buffalos
Kitchen Table
http://www.buffalos
Law Enforcement.
http://www.buffalos
Lil Red Riding Hood Chunk
http://www.buffalos
Lucky Louie
http://www.buffalos
The Mom Song
http://www.buffalos
Tolerant Cat
http://www.buffalos
Uncle Jay
http://www.buffalos
Walk-in Closet
http://www.buffalos
Who Needs Pockets
http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dating Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A guy walks into a bookstore. Not looking for
anything in particular. On his way to the back of
the store, he spots something of interest. A
book, with a very interesting title, "Dating for
the New Millennium. What Women Want." So he picks
it up and opens it to a random page.
"Chapter 1 The First Date."
So, he glances the chapter over for a few
minutes, and rushes out of the bookstore to call
a friend whom he's wanted to ask out for quite a
while.
When he gets home, picks up the phone and calls
her. She answers, "Hello?" He says, "Hi, Jessica?
It's me. Listen, I was wondering if you would
want to go see a movie with me tonight?"
She says, "Sure, I don't see anything wrong with
that." He gets excited. He thought she'd say, "No
Way!" but she didn't. So, he decided to take it
one step further.
He asks, "Great, well how about dinner before the
movie?" She replies, "Sure, that would be great
too!"
"Fine, I'll pick you up about 9, you should have finished eating by
then!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Clean Windshields without Straining or Stretching
Windshield Wonder is the easy reach microfiber window cleaner that
eliminates straining and stretching. It uses a 16" handle to help
reach all the way down to the dash and base of your rear window.
Windshield Wonder is also perfect for moisture and fog removal.
Get two for the price of one when you order today.
Order now
View Web Version
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
camel huge
http://www.buffalos
camel toe cup
http://www.buffalos
camel toe 2
http://www.buffalos
camel toe3
http://www.buffalos
came too soon
http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Optic 1050 binoculars with up to 1000X magnification will allow
you to see objects up to 35 miles away! They're great for
vacationing, sporting events, bird watching, and more. These super
lightweight binoculars include features such as:
Wide-angle viewing
Shatterproof lenses
Soft rubber eye cups
Comfort neck strap
Center focusing wheel
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
There once was a young girl from Norway
Who was used to getting things her way
She'd scream and she'd fight
And sometimes she'd bite
Til she got what she wanted all day.
- Rebecca in Arizona
There once was a young girl from Norway.....
Who loved outside to play......
In the snow and the sleet.......
And with her bare feet........
It was hard to keep frostbite away.
- Skeeter
There once was a young girl from Norway......
She had to have her own way........
But the things she did....
As down the mountain she slid........
Made the young boys day. - Skeeter
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Emery Cat is The Fun New Kitty Scratcher That Actually Grooms
Cats Claws While They Play! The secret is the patented honeycomb
surface that works like a nail file, gently filing away sharpness.
Your package includes:
Durable Base with built in catnip
Cute, playful kitty toy
Packet of catnip
Bonus De-shedder
Buy 1 get 1 FREE Now for only $19.95 plus you'll receive the Bonus
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
James Bond walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very
attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks
at
his watch for a moment.
The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?"
"No," Bond replies, "Q has just given me this state-of-the-
watch. I was
just testing it."
The woman, intrigued, says, "A state-of-the-
special about it?"
"I can communicate with it telepathically.
wearing
any panties.
The woman replies: "It's wrong, because I am wearing panties.
Bond: "Strange, I think it's running an hour fast."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Stop your Back Pain!
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Bonus Free travel satchel PLUS stretch & strengthen DVD with order
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-Works on any chair
-Lifetime Warranty!
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Spinal Injury, Chronic Sciatica, and Pinched Nerves
Bulging & Slipped Discs and Muscle Soreness
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http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hey Bill-I just about died when I heard this one at work today.
Cindy J in frozen Seattle.
Since his little affairs have come to light, several of Tiger Woods'
sponsors have dropped him. However, Pfizer has decided to sponsor
him. They are making a new drug called Tiagra. It's good for 18
holes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The SlipOver - Dual Sided Slipcover - As Seen on TV
Make your old, ugly beat-up sofa look BRAND NEW
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Patent-pending design
Easy care fabric that's stain resistant!
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1736
Dancing With Wolfstien
After a day of being cooped up in the house for the dogs, they are
ready to play. After a day of working at the office dad is ready
to take
it easy... something must give... Dad has to give. It is like
coming home
to three four year olds high on caffeine.
BJ gets out of his car, Diana opens the house door and three dogs
are
unleashed...
BJ: Hi guys...!
Katie: FATHER!!!
As she leaps forward and crashes into BJ sending BJ backwards...
BJ: Hey slow down there girl.
Katie: Sorry father, but I am just so excited...
Then Rudy who is three times the size of Katie comes barreling in.
Thud!!!
BJ: Gasp!! Down Rudy... Down!
Rudy: Aw shucks Dad...
BJ: You called me Dad...
Rudy: Did not..
Sandi: Hi Daddy! (As she jumps up almost to eye level), Let's play.
BJ: How can I not. Let's go running around the yard!
Yay!!!
Diana watches from the door as the four kids go playing... BJ throws
a stick, the dogs chase it, then chase BJ,,, BJ chases the dog..and
on
and on it goes.
The herd in Guthrie
(as bad as it is to leave the dogs in the morning, it is pure Heaven
to
come home at night)
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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