THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
where the world goes for its daily dose of humor!
I look to the future because that's where
I'm going to spend the rest of my life.
George Burns
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
My next door neighbor works for the city. He plows snow
for the city parks. Typically, for years, when there is snow
out, he will come home during the lunch hour, drop his blade,
and clean off the street in front of our houses for a small couple
hundred feet. No big deal, He was not making a special trip. Just
not exactly following city procedure, since his job says he can only
use his city equipment on parks, and not the city streets. Well,
unfortunately, the snow was slick, the other day, and guess what? He ran into the other
neighbors' parked car with the snow plow blade . Needless to
say, since the action was not a valid job activity, the neighbor guy
snowplower now faces a rather lengthy job suspension. In addition, he likely
will be asked to reimburse city insurance for fixing the damage
on the parked car. And all because the guy wanted to plow a few feet
of snow out in front of his house. By contrasts, we look at our
politicians of the day. We ask our selves how much they have their
"hands in the till" and their own theft activities boggle the mind.
But, here is a little moral for you.
If you are just a pee-yonne type nobody guy, don't get caught
with your hand in the cookie jar. Your boss may be stealing the cookies,
but if you get caught with just a crumb, you're history.
TRUST ME!...s' truth!
We do hope you enjoy today's issue
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
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THE COMICS
what my wife says
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a271.html
first dates
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a272.html
a lesson from the marriage counselor
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a273.html
the truth about dating
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a274.html
the real irony of it
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a275.html
improving your game
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a276.html
the internet
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a277.html
when men go fishing
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a278.html
the truth about the tin man
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a279.html
the diplomacy of husbandhood
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a280.html
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LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Emma - Le trefle
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a3017.html
NEW Fail Compilation March 201
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a3018.html
Grey Poupon "The Lost Footage"
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a3016.html
the frogs
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a3019.html
A young doctor went to look at a practice that was up for sale in a
very remote part of West Virginia. It looked perfect with a
comfortable house, fully equipped lab, and lovely gardens. The old
doctor even quoted a very affordable price.
"This looks great," said the young doctor. "I just can't figure out
how you're able to have such a nice set up with so few people to
practice on.
"It's just simple, common sense and a strong work ethic," replied the
older medico. "For example, most folks around here take a couple
weeks off for a vacation every year.
ife and I, however, spend the time at home, gardening and putting
things in order. Our herb garden gives us a huge harvest because of
that, so we mix the herbs and boil them up for my secret tonic."
"But that doesn't explain this fine house and all this land," said
the younger man.
The elder doc replied, "That's where going that extra bit pays off. I
run into my patients at church, at the store, whatever, right after
they get back from their vacations. I tell them they don't look too
good, and they usually say that their vacation took a lot out of
them." He continued, "I'll agree with them, then invite them to stop
around to my office for some of my old fashioned tonic, and at ten
bucks a bottle, it can add up really fast! Of course, that's just the
beginning.
A few weeks after a patient buys the tonic, I comment on how much
better they're looking, so that they feel like the tonic is working."
"Then I have them stop by the office for a complete physical exam,
just to make sure everything is alright. I also tell them to bring in
a specimen, and this way I get my bottles back!"
_____________
At the plane crash site, one lone survivor sat with his back against a
tree, chewing on a bone. As he tossed the bone onto a huge pile of
bones,he noticed the rescue team. "Thank Heavens!", he cried out in
relief...."I am saved!"
The rescue team did not move, as they were in shock, seeing the pile
of human bones beside this lone survivor. Obviously he had eaten his
comrades. The Survivor saw the horror in their faces
and hung his own head in shame.
"You can't judge me for this," he insisted. "I had to survive. Is it
so wrong to want to live?"
The leader of the rescue team stepped forward, shaking his head in
disbelief. "I won't judge you for doing what was necessary to
survive, but Good Heavens, man, your plane only went down yesterday!"
_______________
All I Need to Know About Life I learned From a Cow!
* If it's good, milk it for all its worth.
* Successful people are moovers and shakers.
* Don't just be one of the herd.
* The cream always rises to the top.
* Don't stoop to a barnyard mentality.
* Don't be bossy.
* It is better to have milked and churned than to have never milked at
all.
* If you need to get somewhere, hoof it.
* Some days can be udder frustration.
FUN PAGES
Which Is Worse?
http://tinyurl.com/bcxqzog
Spaceship Jogging Stroller
http://tinyurl.com/ceeq8zb
I Don't Stalk
http://tinyurl.com/bu3teuz
Parenting Done Right
http://tinyurl.com/dxyjck6
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
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