THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
where the world goes for its daily dose of humor
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Well, as you can probably guess by the looks
of this issue, the postman is now back at home
after a couple of days in the hospital. Turk the
dog greeted me with lots of kisses and the fam
gathered around to welcome me home. its good to
have loved ones, yes indeed. And thanks for all
your well wishes and emails they are greatly appreciated.!
Altho I tried to maintain the page while "in the joint,"
unfortunately, the hospital wi fi was unreliable.
Tenuous at best it was little good for the heavy needs
of doing an issue of the postman. Its good to be
back to normal once again.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
__________
THE COMICS
not a good one
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a251.html
3 alarm chilli
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a252.html
one day in the garden
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a253.html
whats the difference
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a254.html
runs in your family
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a255.html
how u see the glass
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a256.html
your childhood
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a257.html
ignoring you
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a258.html
a gift for the honored guests
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a259.html
staying free
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a260.html
_________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
4-year old plays the Entertainer
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a3008.html
Durex - SOS Condoms
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a3009.html
The All New 2013 Toyota Corolla - Feels Good Inside TV Commercial
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a3010.html
Lotto 'Lucky Dog' by DDB NZ and The Sweetshop
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a3011.html
After a tiring day, a commuter settled down in her seat and closed her eyes.
As the train rolled out of the station, the guy sitting next to her pulled out his cellphone
and started talking in a loud voice: "Hi sweetheart. It's Eric. I'm on the train."
"Yes, I know it's the six-thirty and not the four-thirty, but you had a long meeting."
"No, honey, not with that blonde from the accounts office. It was with the boss."
"No, sweetheart, you're the only one in my life."
"Yes, I'm sure, cross my heart."
Fifteen minutes later... he was still talking loudly.
When the young woman sitting next to him had enough, she leaned over
and said into the phone, "Eric, Honey, hang up the phone and come back to bed."
Eric doesn't use his cell phone in public any longer. . .
___________
THE DOG:
DOG BED: Any soft, clean surface, such as the white bedspread
in the guest room or the newly upholstered couch in the living room.
DROOL: Is what you do when your persons have food and you don't.
To do this properly you must sit as close as you can and look sad
and let the drool fall to the floor, or better yet, on their laps.
SNIFF: A social custom to use when you greet other dogs. Place
your nose as close as you can to the other dog's rear end and
inhale deeply, repeat several times, or until your
person makes you stop.
GARBAGE CAN: A container which your neighbors put out once a
week to test your ingenuity. You must stand on your hind legs and
try to push the lid off with your nose. If you do it right you are
rewarded with margarine wrappers to shred, beef bones to consume and moldy crusts of bread.
BICYCLES: Two-wheeled exercise machines, invented for dogs to
control body fat. To get maximum aerobic benefit, you must
hide behind a bush and dash out, bark loudly and run alongside
for a few yards; the person then swerves and falls into the bushes,
and you prance away.
DEAFNESS: This is a malady which affects dogs when their
person want them in and they want to stay out. Symptoms include
staring blankly at the person, then running in the opposite direction, or lying down.
______________
The psychiatrist was not expecting the distraught stranger
who staggered into his office and slumped into a chair.
"You've got to help me. I'm losing my memory, Doctor," he sobbed. "I
once had a successful business, a wife, home and family; I was a
respected member of the community. But all that's gone now. Since my
memory began failing, I've lost the business - I couldn't remember
my clients' names. My wife and children have left me, too; and why
shouldn't they - some nights I wouldn't get home until four or five
in the morning. I'd forget where I lived...And it's getting worse.
Doctor - it's getting worse!"
"This is not an unusual form of neurosis," the psychiatrist said
soothingly. "Now tell me, just how long ago did you first become
aware of this condition?"
"Condition?" The man sat up in his chair. "What condition?"
_________
FUN PAGES
Tom Hanks
http://tinyurl.com/a4vplcw
Way Too Cute
http://tinyurl.com/bbolyv4
Great ATM Ad
http://tinyurl.com/bl354yq
Playing Cards With iPads
http://tinyurl.com/at2p9sx
The Children In America
http://tinyurl.com/a2m42wv
THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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