Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
When Eva saw her Pediatrician last month to get ready for school,
the doctor recommended having her speech evaluated by a therapist
to find out if she had a problem or if she was still stuck on baby talk.
We have a large therapy building that was built as part of the expansion
to a regional medical center which is in process, in fact the medical
section of town will be bigger than the tourist section before long.
Anyhow the therapist was showing Eva pictures of animals and Eva
was naming each one and as an extra was giving her impression
of the sound each one makes. Everything went fine until they got to
an alligator and Eva didn't know that one probably because she didn't
know any gator impressions. Buffy told the therapist she didn't
understand why Eva had missed that one because the kid watches
the show where the rednecks shoot alligators in the head in the
swamp. I told her sure let them know you let your five year old
watch Swamp People and zombie movies and they'll send you
to the Mental Health building next. So anyhow Eva has 6 sessions
to go to this month and then they will reassess her. I have no problem
understanding her, I wish they would work on getting her to speak
less heh heh .
I took Eva to the grocery store with Buffy and she exchanged
greetings with every person in the store and then Buffy set up the
lawn chairs outside and Eva got a chance to play with her yard toys
so all in all it was a good day all around. Sandy made a strawberry
pie while everyone was outside and before Eva spotted the
strawberries because she can eat a quart of strawberries with no
problem. Hope you had a good day too. buffalo
A newsletter you may enjoy
*** JustForFunForYou..Adult Humor***
FUNNERS (ADULT HUMOR)
Come Play With Us!
Sometimes We Play Naughty!
Sometimes We Play Nice!
But We Do Have FUN!
Adult-Humor from G (oh yeah) to X (oh my)!
Come Join Our FUN!
We have something for everyone!
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If you are 18 or older, come on in, get comfy and
enjoy the FUN!!
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Phone Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Our biggest disappointment with caller id was that many phone
calls were tagged "Out of Area" rather than giving a phone
number. In particular, banks of phones behind switchboards or in
a Centrex are marked that way, which covers most of those pesky
telemarketers that make our lives so miserable. We've found a way
to work around that, which others with Caller ID may also wish to
use.
When we get calls marked Out of Area, especially at the prime
telemarketer time (6-8 P.M.), we now answer the phone, "KDNA,
you're on the air!" Usually the telemarketer will be a bit
befuddled, and ask for one of us by name. We will repeat that we
are a radio station, that the caller is on the air and is, in
fact, the twenty-fifth caller.
Here's a dialog with one telemarketer who bit real hard:
Me (seeing Out of Area on Caller ID, using bouncy DJ voice):
KDNA, you're on the air!
Telemarketer: May I speak to Mad-uh-leen So...So...So-johr-nohr?
Me: This is KDNA, and you are on the air! You've just won your
choice of a new Ford Explorer or $25,000 in cash!!!
Telemarketer: I have?
Me: You certainly have.
Telemarketer: Oh, my god!
Me: Happy? Which will it be, the Explorer or the money?
Telemarketer: I don't know! Let me get my supervisor!
Me: You don't need your supervisor, it's your prize. Are you
calling us from work?
Telemarketer: Yes I am.
(Background voices.)
Telemarketer: My boss says to take the money.
Me: The money! So you listen to KDNA while you're working?
Telemarketer: I didn't even know we were calling you!
Me: Well, where are you calling us from?
Telemarketer: (Some place thousands of miles from us.)
Me: My, my! I guess you can't pick us up all the way out there!
So what's your name?
Telemarketer: Sherry.
Me: Sherry, tell us here on KDNA what kind of music you like.
Sherry: I'm so nervous I can't even think! Nothing like this has
ever happened to me!
Me: Sherry, if you like the kind of music that we play here on
KDNA, we'll play one just for you!
Sherry: But I wouldn't be able to hear it. Where's your radio
station, anyway?
Me: We're broadcasting out of Silicon Valley, California, at
106.6 FM.
(Obviously, telemarketer isn't smart enough to know FM stations
don't end in even decimals.)
Sherry: This is just so great!
Me: Sherry, how old are you?
Sherry: I'm 20.
Me: And what do you do?
Sherry: I'm a business student at (some college).
Me: What will you do with the money, Sherry? Start a business?
Sherry: Oh, I just don't know!
Me: I thought you said you were at work, Sherry.
Sherry: I am. This is to help pay for college.
Me: What's your job?
Sherry: I'm a telemarketer.
Me: You're a what?
Sherry: I'm a telemarketer ... I call people up and ask them if
they want to buy (product/service/etc.)
Me: Oh, that's too bad.
Sherry: Why?
Me: Because we here at KDNA think telemarketers are the lowest
scum on earth, and I don't think we can give this prize to a
telemarketer. You folks are always interrupting people during
dinner and I think that's rotten. So I don't think you should
win.
Sherry: But that's not fair!
Me: Of course not! But hey, it's my radio show, I get to make the
rules.
Sherry: But you can't do that!
Me: I sure can, I'm giving this prize to the next caller.
Meanwhile, I suggest you quit your job. Today.
Click.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
you're lucky
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two guys
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/j014.html
history explained
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Just try to relax, this won't take long," said the gynecologist
trying to calm the obviously nervous young blonde patient.
"Haven't you ever been examined like this before?" he asked.
"Yeah, sure," she replied, "but not by a doctor!"
~~~~
A wife, one evening, drew her husband's attention to the
couple next door and said, "Do you see that couple? How
devoted they are? He kisses her every time they meet.
Why don't you do that?"
"I would love to," replied the husband, "but I don't know
her well enough."
~~~~~
"Mom, I'm pregnant," announced a teen.
"How can that be? What did I tell you about sex?" asked her mom.
"That I should take measures. That's what I did! I took measures and
went with the biggest."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Spring Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I woke early one morning, The earth lay cool and still
When suddenly a tiny bird Perched on my window sill,
He sang a song so lovely So carefree and so gay,
That slowly all my troubles Began to slip away.
He sang of far off places Of laughter and of fun,
It seemed his very trilling, Brought up the morning sun.
I stirred beneath the covers Crept slowly out of bed,
Then gently lowered the window And crushed his fucking head.
I'm not a morning person
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Golf Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two couples went out golfing together. The men hit first from the
men's tee and walked with the ladies to their tee box. The first
lady took a mighty swing at the ball, missing it completely, while
passing some gas rather loudly in the process. No one commented.
She addressed the ball again but this time she passed just little
gas as she made contact with the ball, topping it and moving it only
a short distance.
She said, "I wonder why it didn't go any further?"
One of the men said, "I don't think you gave it enough gas."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two Columbia Yuppies, neighbors for years, were constantly trying to
"out-status" each other, The first man mentioned that his daughter
had just been accepted at Vassar.
"That's nice," replied the other, "but the main thing the girls
really learn there is fornication."
The first man became irate and said, "I'll have you know my wife
attended Vassar!"
The neighbor smiled and said, "Take it from me pal, she certainly
could use a refresher course."
I know this woman ...
Husband, upon meeting ex- after two years of separation: "Listen
honey, just for old time's sake, why don't we have a leisurely
dinner, share a few glasses of fine wine, go to my apartment and
really make love?"
Ex-: "Over my dead body!"
Husband: "There you go! - You haven't changed a bit"
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LynnLynn's Links
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If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com
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Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Happy Birthday
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/M_GC/B_D.html
Cathy's Page Via Samantha
http://community-2.webtv.net/CATHYFROMpa/CathysWebpage/page6.html
Marlene/When Mama Sang /Gospel song for Mother's Day
http://www.wtv-zone.com/summerhoosier3/html1/WhenMamaSang.html
Friendship Gardens
http://www.carolspoetry.com/carol07.html
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Kate, a 42 year old mother of 3 had tried
every diet out there with only temporary success.
After losing weight on the HCG diet, she has kept
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Surfin Surfari
Coney Island Via Wesley
http://www.coneyisland.com/
Hare Pie Day
http://www.practicallyedible.com/edible.nsf/pages/harepieday
Egg Stacking Art!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/eggart.html
Amazing Grace
http://www.clarrissegill.com/videoclips/amazing_grace.php
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Hello,
We wanted to inform you today that you can now download a program
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the world right on your PC!
Press Here to watch TV from around the world on your PC:
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Sketch A Face
http://www.magixl.com/heads/poir.php
Tweak Ubuntu ! Via Wesley
http://ubuntu-tweak.com/
Free Spell Check App for Windows Via Wesley
http://tinyspell.m6.net/
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We would like to know if you would be interested in working from
home in your spare time writing short articles for us. You will be
paid $25.00 - $45.00 per hour writing these articles.
We will also pay you $12.00 - $50.00 per hour for posing in blogs,
and up to $450 for each fiction or non fiction story we ask you to
write.
Press here if you are interested:
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All my best,
Freelance Home Writers Network
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Animal World
Doggie Zone
http://tahilla.typepad.com/petsmrsa/blog_index.html
Kitty Korner
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ObwqOrGlKxY&feature=related
Backpack Cat
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/backpack.html
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Hi,
We would like to show you why you may be "fat" and why you're unable
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First off, please always know that it's not your fault...
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After you see what the problem is, you will see how easy it is to
finally lose the fat that you want to lose.
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Movie Links
Kangaroo
http://www.buffaloschips.com/90208.htm
Pancakes
http://www.buffaloschips.com/90209.htm
Paris speaks out
http://www.buffaloschips.com/90210.htm
Peeping Tom
http://www.buffaloschips.com/90401.htm
Peyton
http://www.buffaloschips.com/90402.htm
Parking 2
http://www.buffaloschips.com/asddsas.htm
Parking3
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gdfgds.htm
Peeling
http://www.buffaloschips.com/dsfasd.htm
Pigeon
http://www.buffaloschips.com/qwda.htm
Ping Pong
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jlkfd.htm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dung Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Faced with some of the world's strictest anti-drug laws, some
addicts in Malaysia are sniffing fresh cow dung to get high. An
official at the National Narcotics Agency said the problem was small
but growing among addicts who cannot buy drugs.
Trade Minister Rafidah Aziz was quoted in The New Straits Times
newspaper on Wednesday as saying she wanted the government to deal
with addicts who sniff cow dung, glue and even polystyrene smoke.
She did not elaborate.
"The cow dung emits gases like sulfur, and addicts sniff on these
gases to get high," the official at the agency said on condition of
anonymity.
Despite harsh anti-narcotics laws that call for death by hanging for
drug traffickers, Malaysia does not have legislation to cover such
acts as cow dung sniffing, the official said.
"The problem is not very serious yet, but we are worried as this
method means addicts can get high for free," the official said.
Wow man this is some good shit.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
come together
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commercial
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cumming
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community picnic1
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complain1
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Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There was a young lady from China
Who mistook for her mouth her vagina.
Her clitoris huge
She covered with rouge
And lipsticked her labia minor.
A mystical painter named Foxx
Once picked up a girl on the docks.
He made an elliptic
Mysterious triptych,
And painted it right on her box.
A bird loving woman named Hester
Had a parrot who often would pester
Said lass for a cracker
She gave her a stack fer
She always did what Polyester
(Gary Hallock)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
News Flash:
Elton John has been asked to sing at Osama Bin Laden's funeral service.
His song will be - "Sandals in the Bin"
Ian
Hooters has a new drink they are serving in honor of the demise of Bin
Laden. Its called "Bullseye" and its made with 2 shots and a ...........
splash!
John
Usama bin Laden was given a religious funeral prior to his burial at
sea, senior
military officials relayed to me in super top secret, triple encrypted
hand written sticky note.
Religious rites were conducted on the deck of the USS Carl Vinson
aircraft
carrier at about 1:10 a.m. Monday in the Persian Gulf.
In accordance with Islamic practice, bin Laden was washed and wrapped in
a
white sheet before buried at sea at 2 a.m. local time, senior U.S.
military and
intelligence officials said.
Then, "In accordance with US Navy SEAL practice, the Team pissed on him,
stuck a pulled pork sandwich in his mouth and a kosher hot dog up his
ass,
and pushed him overboard with the garbage," a senior SEAL officer said.
Barbara
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 2025
Mr Ruthford Randold aka Rudy Cassady
Vet: I am glad you brought Rudy here for his
checkup.
Diana: Why is he licking his right paw all the time?
Is it allergies? Does his paw hurt?
Vet: Nope just nerves.
Diana: Ack! Like Sandi?
Vet: Yes, but not as tramatic. Rudy is a nervous
dog. He gets scared with thunderstorms correct?
Diana: Oh yes.
Vet: He has meds for his kidneys, meds for his tunderstorms,
meds for other anxious moments, this is another.
Diana: Good grief, do we need a counselor for our dogs?
Vet: No, just loving.
The herd
BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult
*********************************************
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
To unsubscribe send a blank e-mail to Buffalos-adult-jokes-unsubscribe@egroups.com
Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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