Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
The price of gas went down about 10 cents a gallon yesterday
and even though it is welcome we are still about 10 cents higher
than all of the neighbors. Although you see a little finger pointing
by all concerned no one has explained why I was paying 20 cents
more per gallon than in 2008 when the oil is 40 dollars a barrel less
than what it was then. Neither side wants to stop the flow of
campaign contributions by blaming the oil companies or refiners
for gouging just like business doesn't want to accuse government of
having destroyed a third of the value of our dollar in the past
three years. To top things off the speculators are just waiting for
any little piece of bad news to drive the price of gas up. Riots in
the Middle East bought a smile to their faces for a month, but when
flooding in Louisiana failed to shut down the refineries they started
frowning a little bit but reports that fires in Canada was shutting down
the flow from our largest supplier yesterday, they probably had an
orgasm and the price of a barrel of oil went over 100 dollars again.
That would make sense if it weren't for the fact that production was
slowed in the Mideast because there was a glut of oil. Myself, I
do the only thing I can do and reduce the number of trips I make
during the week. I can do that because I don't have to go to work.
You are probably not that lucky.
Enjoy the chips and lets hope we get another drop in gas prices
before they raise them for Memorial Day.... buffalo
A Newsletter you may enjoy
*** JustForFunForYou..Adult Humor***
FUNNERS (ADULT HUMOR)
Come Play With Us!
Sometimes We Play Naughty!
Sometimes We Play Nice!
But We Do Have FUN!
Adult-Humor from G (oh yeah) to X (oh my)!
Come Join Our FUN!
We have something for everyone!
Our mail runs 6000+ per month so choose Digests
if u don't want mail to clog or
Indidvidual if u want to see attachments.
If you are 18 or older, come on in, get comfy and
enjoy the FUN!!
* JustForFunForYou-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
* http://groups.yahoo.com/group/JustForFunForYou
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please visit our Sponsor
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
See Everything In High Definition Color And Clarity
HD Aviators are the fashionable new sunglasses featuring built in high
definition technology at a price everyone can afford. Now you'll be
able to protect your eyes while still getting the color, clarity and
high definition you want. Like no other glasses you have ever worn.
Limited time offer so act now.
Click the link below for more information:
http://buffaloschips.com/jklll
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chat Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A shy Welsh village man, Elwyn, noticed that a beautiful girl
had moved in next door. But Elwyn was shy so every time he saw
her in the garden or in the street he couldn't think of what to
say, so he would say 'good morning miss' or 'good afternoon
miss' and hurry off about his business.
He talked to his friend in the bar. "Jones," he said, "a
beautiful girl lives next door to me, but I don't know how to
chat girls up, I've never done it before."
Jones said, "All you have to do is say to her 'good morning miss.
It's a beautiful day isn't it? What beautiful flowers in your
garden.' That will get the conversation going."
Elwyn practiced this in front of a mirror for a few days. Then
one night at the local pub he saw her. Elwyn stood near the bar
trying to pluck up the courage to go and talk to her. He was
nearly ready when the girl got up and went to the washroom.
This is it, thought Elwyn, its now or never. So he stood outside
the washroom and waited. She was ever such a long time that poor
Elwyn was starting to lose his nerve. He was just about to walk
away when the girl came out. There she was, right in front of him
looking beautiful.
Elwyn said, "Erm, erm g-good evening, miss."
She said, "Good evening."
He continued, "It's a b-beautiful day isn't it?"
"Yes," she said, "it is a splendid day."
Encouraged he went on. "I'm your neighbor, and I must tell you
you have a lovely garden."
She smiled, "Thank you. I think so, too."
Stuck for something else to talk about, Elwyn stammered, "Erm,
erm, err, ah, you've just had a shit, have you?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
a hybrid
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/l001.html
building a wall
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/l002.html
facts of life
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/l003.html
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A woman went to a doctor claiming she had three vaginas!! The doctor
examined her and sure enough, she DID have three vaginas. He`d never
seen such a thing in all his years of medical practice. He told her
"I`ll stitch up two of them, but leave the middle one alone."
"Will that make me normal again?" she asked. "Of course." he said,
"This way, you won`t be screwed left, right and center!"
Candy looked quite depressed. Heidi said, "Candy, sweetie,
what's the matter?"
Candy, "Well, you know that Viagra stuff is around now. I
guess this means we girls can look forward, one day, to
having sex with really old guys."
"Uh, well, yeah, I guess so. But what's the problem?"
Candy cried, "I can just see it now! They'll start hollering,
'Who's your granddaddy! Who's your granddaddy!"
A very naive British sailor is in a bar in London. He meets
a wild girl, and she takes him upstairs. She takes off her
pants and her panties.
He looks between her legs, and he says, "What's that?"
She says, "It's me lower mouth."
He says, "What do you mean, your 'lower mouth'?"
She says, "Just what I said, it's me lower mouth. It's got
a mustache...it's got lips..."
He says, "Has it got a tongue in it?"
She says, "Not always."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Amazing Hummingbird Vine No More Boring Bird Houses
Turn your backyard into a natural hummingbird playground. In the first
year of planting the beautiful, hardy vines you'll notice the climb
skyward. It wil climb on it's own covering walls, arbors and fences in
no time. These vines produce vibrant trumpet flowers in a rainbow of
colors. Each blossom is loaded with nectar that hummingbirds find
irresistible and return year after year.
Buy today and we'll double your order.
Learn More
http://buffaloschips.com/humvin
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A guy walks into a shrink's office complaining of trouble with
women. The shrinks asks him what he looks for in a woman, and the
guy replies, "Big tits."
The shrink says, "No, I meant for a serious relationship."
The guy replies, "Oh, seriously big tits."
"No, no, no. I mean what do you look for in the one woman you want
to spend the rest of your life with?"
The doctor looked kind of worried as the guy just sat there on his
couch laughing... "Spend the rest of my life with one woman? No
woman's tits are that big!"
Two guys were out walking their dogs, when one dog wanders off to
pee against the wall. Like dogs do, it raised it's leg and started
to do his thing.
The second dog then goes up and starts to go exactly where the other
dog did. But instead of raising his leg, he stood up on his hind
legs, put both paws on the wall and relieved himself.
One guy says to the other, "Wow, how did you teach him to pee like
that?"
The second man replies, "I didn't teach him. He's done it ever
since the wall fell on him!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Grow Tomatoes Bigger and Faster with the Topsy Turvy Tomato Tree!
The Topsy-Turvy Tree is the perfect solution to your garden to grow
healthy, rich, vine-ripe tomatoes - 20% faster!
Includes:
5 Foot Powder Coated Steel Grow Stand
Oversized 3-Port Grow Bag
Stainless Steel Hanging System
Grow 3 Different Plants in the Same Planter
All for only 2 easy payments of $19.95 (plus P&H).
http://buffaloschips.com/topturv
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I ran into a friend just after he had returned from his regular
Saturday morning round of golf. When I asked him how his round had
been, he said, "It was lousy...I only hit two good balls all day."
"Well," I replied, "that's better than none."
He countered with, "Not if it's how I did it."
"Oh?" I queried.
"You see," he said. "It was when I was in a bunker and stepped on the
rake!"
The salesman reported back to his boss after several weeks on the
road and said, "All I got was two orders."
"What were they? Anything good?"
"Nope," the salesman replied. "They were 'Get out!' and 'Stay out!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Extended Service no obligation quote.
Get the extra protection you and your family need on
the road right here:
http://buffaloschips.com/mtce
Cover most vehicle with less than 125,000 miles and
less than 10 years old.
Also includes:
- 24-Hour Roadside Assistance
- Car Rental Benefits.
- Trip Interruption Benefit.
- Extended Towing Benefits
Go here for details:
http://buffaloschips.com/mtce
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cat Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
SAYING GOODBYE TO MOTHER....
You Don't Have To Own A Cat To Appreciate This One! You don't even
have to like 'em!
We were dressed and ready to go out for the New Years Eve Party.
We turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on, covered
our pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard.
We phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi
arrived and we opened the front door to leave the house..
The cat we put out in the yard, scoots back into the house.. We
didn't want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to
eat the bird.
My wife goes out to the taxi, while I went inside to get the cat..
The cat runs upstairs, with me in hot pursuit.
Waiting in the cab, my wife doesn't want the driver to know that the
house will be empty for the night.
So, she explains to the taxi driver that I will be out soon,
'He's just going upstairs to say Goodbye to my Mother.' A few
minutes later, I get into the cab.
'Sorry I took so long,' I said, as we drove away.
'That stupid bitch was hiding under the bed. I had to poke her with
a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off, so I
grabbed her by the neck. Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to
keep her from scratching me. But it worked! I hauled her fat ass
downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!'
The cab driver hit a parked car
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Micro Touch Max The All-In-One Personal Trimmer
The Micro Touch Max is a compact trimmer with a built in light for
easy hair removal. Designed to trim as close as a blade, yet its
safe to the touch. The built in light makes it easy to always see
what youre doing, even in a dimly lit room, and makes it perfect for
on the go.
Order now and you'll get the Micro Touch Max and as a bonus we'll
also include the 10 piece grooming kit so you always look your best.
Limited time offer so act now.
Click the link below for more information:
http://buffaloschips.com/trim
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Thanks Brother
http://silverandgoldandthee.com/F_C_files/Cards/Bro2.html
Crosses In The Sand Via Juanita
http://community-2.webtv.net/eclectic-guy/CROSSESINTHESAND/
Living Water Via Juanita
http://www.angelfire.com/ab4/1944/Mt.html
Disappointed
http://www.reflectionsofsouthbreeze.com/Pages/disappointed.htm
Babes In Christ
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/BibleStudy/babesinchrist.html
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Microcam - Capture Any Moment Any Time
One of the world's smallest DV camcorders from Bell + Howell, a
trusted brand in photo technology for over 100 years. It's so tiny,
yet records high resolution digital video and still photos with
sound. It's super wide lens lets you capture all the action. The
micro cam is not only manually operated, but is sound and motion
activated too.
Payment plans available - order yours today.
Learn More
http://tinyurl.com/26ebmw8
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Surfin Surfari
Charmin Toilet Paper
http://www.sitorsquat.com/sitorsquat/home#
top 10 disgraced athletes Via Wesley
http://tinyurl.com/y5hm2p7
Humorous Signs!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/hsigns.html
Signs For Woman!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wsigns.html
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Hello,
We wanted to inform you today that you can now download a program
online that will allow you to watch unlimited television from around
the world right on your PC!
Press Here to watch TV from around the world on your PC:
http://buffaloschips.com/comptv
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Security Measures Tutorial
http://www.computertricksandtips.com/sm/security_measures.htm
Are U being Throttled ?
http://broadband.mpi-sws.org/transparency/bttest.php
Create & Manage a Podcast Blog
http://podcastgen.sourceforge.net/
Hide Email Address from Spam Bots
http://www.siteup.com/encoder.html
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
We would like to know if you would be interested in working from
home in your spare time writing short articles for us. You will be
paid $25.00 - $45.00 per hour writing these articles.
We will also pay you $12.00 - $50.00 per hour for posing in blogs,
and up to $450 for each fiction or non fiction story we ask you to
write.
Press here if you are interested:
http://buffaloschips.com/fhwn
All my best,
Freelance Home Writers Network
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Animal World
Kitty Korner Via Dianne
http://www.funnycatpix.com/
http://www.cats.org.uk/
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Hi,
We would like to show you why you may be "fat" and why you're unable
to lose weight no matter how hard you try.
First off, please always know that it's not your fault...
Press here to see why you're fat:
http://buffaloschips.com/fat
After you see what the problem is, you will see how easy it is to
finally lose the fat that you want to lose.
Thank you!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Movie Links
Anillocompromiso
http://www.buffaloschips.com/fjhgkhl.htm
Arab
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gtuhiuuh.htm
Baby Boomers Battle
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gtdfhgujghjh.htm
Beer
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jhvgjdkfghdkfg.htm
beer launcher
http://www.buffaloschips.com/hnjkdfjhgdklghg.htm
Lazy River Pee Prank
http://www.buffaloschips.com/asdwqw.htm
Leno Needs Body Guard
http://www.buffaloschips.com/agtrf.htm
Let the Beast Go
http://www.buffaloschips.com/acdsd.htm
Levis
http://www.buffaloschips.com/adewwrr.htm
Lip Balm Commercial
http://www.buffaloschips.com/axsdf.htm
Hoppalas Turnen
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gcfdrde.htm
In God We Trust
http://www.buffaloschips.com/azsxs.htm
Interessant Eierschlange
http://www.buffaloschips.com/awereew.htm
You Know That Has To Hurt
http://www.buffaloschips.com/aswsw.htm
Javelin Live Fire VS T72
http://www.buffaloschips.com/axdxs.htm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Exchange Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A young blonde, having just returned from a great week-long vacation
in South America, walked into the local bank and asked about
exchanging
currency.
The teller said he would try to help her.
After she plopped a huge wad of bills onto the counter, the teller
then counted it, made a phone call, and returned to count out
$27.18.
The wide-eyed woman gasped. "You mean to tell me that's all I get
for that mountain of bills?"
"I'm afraid so Miss," replied the teller, "That's the current rate
of exchange according to our foreign exchange section."
"Good Grief!" she hissed, "and I gave that cheap skunk breakfast,
too!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A XXXmas Story
http://www.buffaloschips.com/0re.htm
Anger Management
http://www.buffaloschips.com/ohj9.htm
Angry Residents
http://www.buffaloschips.com/9j43.htm
Good Lickin
http://www.buffaloschips.com/kriw.htm
Anna Show
http://www.buffaloschips.com/iefj.htm
Anna's House
http://www.buffaloschips.com/5e6.htm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
STOP SNORING TONIGHT, GAURANTEED!
Say Goodbye To Snoring! Featured on CBS Host Morley Safer's American
Medical Review Television Series, the My Snoring Solution Jaw
Supporter is the consumers choice for comfort. Voted The Worlds Most
Comfortable and Effective Anti-snoring Product
Opens up throat airways and treats the symptoms of obstructive sleep
apnea; depression; daytime sleepiness; limb-jerking, punching and
kicking while sleeping, and more. Machine washable.
Limited Time: Buy One, Get One Free For just $119.97 plus shipping
and handling you can order 2 Jaw Supporters.The free unit is great
for travel or to give as a gift to a loved one
Order now and also receive the American Medical Review DVD, PLUS the
7 Steps to Sleep Success FREE! Only $119.97 complete with a 90 Day
Money Back Guarantee. Stop snoring tonight so everybody gets a good
night sleep! Order Now!
http://buffaloschips.com/snorer
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A bather whose clothing was strewed
By winds that left her quite nude,
Saw a man come along,
And unless we are wrong
You expected this line to be lewd.
There was a young parson from Harridge,
Tried to grind his betrothed in a carriage. She said,
"No, you young goose,
Just try self-abuse,
And the other we'll try after marriage."
There's an over-sexed lady named Whyte
Who insists on a dozen a night.
A fellow named Cheddar
Had the brashness to wed her-
His chance of survival is slight.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hoveround has been helping people regain their mobility for over 17
years and we want to help you get your independence back. We
believe that everyone should be free to get out and explore the
world, even if they're on a tight budget.
Did you know that 9 out of 10 Hoveround owners got their power
wheelchair at little to no cost*? It's true! There are no claim
forms to fill out and no upfront costs if you qualify.
Get your Complimentary Information Kit here:
http://buffaloschips.com/huver
Upon receipt of your information we will send you a complimentary
no-obligation information kit with DVD. Once again, there are no
costs to qualify. Don't wait to regain your mobility and your
freedom - ACT NOW because life in a Hoveround is BETTER ALL AROUND.
Sincerely,
Thomas E. Kruse
President and Founder
Hoveround Corporation
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I have a "true" blond story for you. This really did happen... I
went
to dinner with my husband, a male friend of ours, Jim, and his new
girlfriend, Dorthory.
While eating dinner we got on the subject of vacations. "Bimbette"
(I
really called her this for the rest of the time they were together
and right to her face). Anyway, Bimbette said that she wanted to go
to Gotham City for her next vacation.
I tried to explain to her that it was not a real place. She laughed
and said "it is too, it's where Batman lives".
I then laughed and looked over at Jim who smiled and told me she was
serious. I then tried to explain that, "he does not exist, why do
you
think there have been three of them: Clooney, Kilmer and Keaton?"
She looked me straight in the eye and said "that is because he
doesn't want anyone to know who he really is."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Grow your own delicious blueberries with Blueberry Giant.
Produce up to 4 pints of juicy blueberries daily- 16,000 blueberries
from a single plant.
Buy 2 plants for $10.00 and get 1 on us.
Learn More
http://buffaloschips.com/bbery
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 2035
Warning!
Todays message is a warning I almost learned
the hard way. I purchased at a steep discount
some Purina one dogfood at a place because it
was damaged and opened, but resealed by the
store.
Today when I was feeding my dogs (Sandi and
Katie) in the dog run, I saw a glitter in the food.
It was a tack. I pulled the dish back and went
through the food piece by piece and found about
a dozen. They were small enough that my poor
doggies would have digested them along with
the food and might have died. I sifted through
the food three times and returned the food
confident it was clean. I will go through the
rest of the food (in the bag) tonight.
I guess the warning is... if you buy an unsealed
product, be careful.
The herd
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult
*********************************************
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
To unsubscribe send a blank e-mail to Buffalos-adult-jokes-unsubscribe@egroups.com
Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
No comments:
Post a Comment