THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
It is incomprehensible that God should exist,
and it is incomprehensible that he should not exist.
Blaise Pascal
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
You know what I heard? President Obama seems to have
changed his policies on immigration.
To help save the economy, the Government will announce
next month that the Immigration Department will start deporting
seniors instead of illegals in order to lower Social Security
and Medicare costs. Also, the illegals NEED your social security number!
Older people are easier to catch and will not remember how to get back home
You know the funny thing about that?
It actually makes a little sense, too:)
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
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THE COMICS
alcoholic
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/x041.html
detachable
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/x042.html
Hamlets duplex
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/x043.html
so far
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/x044.html
real fur
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/x045.html
out of vodka
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/x046.html
politician
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/x047.html
to arms
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/x048.html
thesaurus
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/x049.html
you get the raise
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/x050.html
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LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Nun Caught on Camera Stealing Beer
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a2388.html
spooning
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a2389.html
007
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a2390.html
what is that sound
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a2391.html
One day a man decided to buy a farm. He went up to a house where a man was
selling a farm. The man said "Yeah I'll sell it to you,but first there are
four things you need to know: a rooster is called a cock,a wagon is called a
pullet,a donkey is called an ass and when the donkey starts acting up all you
have to do is smack it." Within a couple of days the man had the farm. He
was walking down the road with the rooster,donkey and wagon. When all of a
sudden his donkey starts acting up.
He looks up and sees a woman approaching him. He stops the woman and says,
"Excuse me miss,will you hold my cock and pullet while i smack my ass?"
________________
you are a bad cook if:
-The leftover crumbs make a great replacement for kitty litter.
- Those annoying pest control companies keep pestering you,
Wanting to buy and patent your recipe for candy Christmas cookies.
- You forget and leave a gallon of your homemade ice cream on the
Porch overnight during a record busting heat- and the next afternoon,
not only is it still solid, but it tastes better.
- The EPA requires that all your garbage cans be marked with
large bright red 'bio-hazard' symbols.
_____________
An elderly male called 911 and reported, woman over here
doing some yard work in one of those thong bikinis."
"Sir," said an exasperated dispatcher, "911 is an emergency number.
What do you expect the police to do about a woman in a thong bikini?"
"Nothing," the guy said, "But if she keeps bending over the way she's
been doing, I will be having a heart attack within the next 10 minutes,
so I just wanted to alert you to sending an ambulance for me."
______________
A grade three teacher is giving a lesson on nutrition, and
she decides to ask her students what they had for breakfast.
To add a spelling component, she asks the students to
also spell their answers.
Susan puts up her hand and says she had an egg,
'E-G-G.'
'Very good,' says the teacher.
Peter says he had toast 'T-O-A-S-T.'
'Excellent.'
Johnny has his hand up, and the teacher reluctantly
calls on him.
'I had fuck all,' he says, 'F-U-C-K A-L-L.'
The teacher is mortified, and scolds Johnny for his rude answer.
Later, when the lesson turns to geography, she asks the
students some rudimentary questions.
Susan correctly identifies the Capital of Canada. Peter is
able to tell her which ocean is off Canada 's east coast.
When it's Johnny's turn, the teacher remembers his
rude answer from the nutrition lesson, and decides to
give him a very difficult question.
'Johnny,' she asks, 'Where is the Pakistani border?'
Johnny ponders the question and finally says, 'The
Pakistani boarder is in bed with my mother.
That's why I got fuck all for breakfast.'
__________
FUN PAGES
Phone Sex Lawsuit
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=43595&s=n
Fart Just One Time
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=43585&s=n
Stoner Chipmunk
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=43558&s=n
Dumbest Guy on Earth
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=42331&s=n
Eating The Evidence
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=43597&s=n
That's all folks!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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