Experience is the sinking feeling that you have made this
mistake before.
welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
With all the political correctness these days, I am
getting just a little bit tired. You heard the country
band Lady Antebellum? well because of the stigma,
they are changing their name to Lady A. Antebellum
has its racist implications, of course, Then there is
the issue with Aunt Jemima. Pepsico has not announced
what the new name for it will be, yet. But you know
what? I just realized I am being discriminated against
by Cracker Barrel! restaurant! That's right! I think they
should be politically correct and change the name to
"hardtack barrel!"
We do hope you enjoy today's issue
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_____________________
MEMES N TOONS
what would you do for a Klondike bar
pole dancing
a wise woman once said
a good day
my neighbor
that lying bitch
being a man
when you are not sure
rare mage of a shark
area 51
step up your game
my dream job
fried chicken
an anti depressant pill
a spare
I told my friend 10 jokes to get him to laugh. No pun in 10 did.
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced
them with, but I've been tripping all day.
I've decided to sell my Hoover – it was just collecting dust.
______________
JOKES
the toughest time of my life
several elderly nuns
she brought her report card home
a fifth of whiskey
the best marksmen
change a light bulb
what can I get for five hundred dollars a night
a telephone rings in an apartment
who's up for a 3 some
a necklace cell phone for women
"I'd like to start with the chimney jokes – I've got a stack of them.
The first one is on the house." – Tim Vine
As a scarecrow, people say I'm outstanding in my field. But hay – it's in my jeans.
"The best time to add insult to injury is when you're signing somebody's cast."
– Demetri Martin
"Years ago I used to supply Filofaxes for the mafia. I was involved in very organised crime."
– Milton Jones
"I had a dream last night that I was cutting carrots with the Grim Reaper – dicing with death."
– Tim Vine
I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.
_____________________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Best Of Stealing Pranks | Just For Laughs Compilation
China Street Life Shanghai
The Structures That Defy Gravity
Gracie the Two-Legged Dog Gets a Wheelchair Made of LEGOs
THE ULTIMATE LIGHTNING STORM - In Slow Motion
Coast Guard Rescues Sinking Yacht
How Volcanoes Froze the Earth (Twice)
What Old People Do For Fun
UNCUT funny dancing falling silo
1 US Pilot Dogfights 7 MiGs - Korea 1952
My wife told me I had to stop acting like a flamingo. So I had to put my foot down.
"I needed a password eight characters long, so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarves."
– Nick Helm
Sometimes I tuck my knees into my chest and lean forward. That's just how I roll.
____________________
A LITTLE BIT OF HUMOR
a cat for Christmas
what I need
be who you were
my life for no reason
500 dollars for an A
come over
after 65 years
to frown
Barbie
the aging app
after 15 minutes
milk sheep
redneck door bell
Socialism monopoly
remind her of stuff
__._,_.___
Posted by: "Martin a.k.a. the postman" <martin7957@yahoo.com>
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