THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
John F. Kennedy
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
It was pretty hot yesterday, had an absolutely hellacious
thunderstorm in the morning that woke me up with a start,
and it sent Turk the dog aka Carlos the rat into a howling
fit. Unfortunately, I didn't wake up soon enough and with
every window in the house open, naturally the carpets all
got a good soaking. It cleared off later and so I got to
use one of my fathers day gifts...
There was a bit of confusion at the store this morning.
When I was ready to pay for my groceries, the cashier said,
"Strip down, facing me."Making a mental note to complain to
my congressman about Homeland Security running amok,
I did just as she had instructed.When the hysterical shrieking
and alarms finally subsided, I found out that she was referring to my credit card.
I have been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.
They need to make their instructions to us seniors a little clearer!
It was just one of them days.
So how was your Monday?
We do hope you enjoy today's issue
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
____________
THE COMICS
nice start
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/m011.html
a confession
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/m012.html
cow tippin
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/m013.html
oh great
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/m014.html
gps system
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/m015.html
domineering
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/m016.html
healthy body
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/m017.html
swiss army
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/m018.html
taxi
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/m019.html
THE ARMY WANTS YOU
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/m020.html
__________________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
The Crazy Nastyass Honey Badger
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1723.html
Priest Prankster
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1724.html
Police Officer Forces Drivers To Blow On Breathalyzer Prank
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1725.html
Surfin´ Bulldog (Beach Boys - Surfin´ USA)
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1726.html
As I was nursing my baby, my cousin's six-year-old daughter,
Krissy, came into the room. Never having seen anyone breast feed
before, she was intrigued and full of all kinds of questions about what I was doing.
After mulling over my answers, she remarked,
'My mom has some of those, but I don't think she knows how to use them..'
_______________
Couples who have lived together a long time have their own way of communicating.
A woman overheard her aunt and uncle one day, "What are you looking
for in that closet?" she asked."Nothing," he snapped.
"Well, it's not in there. Look under the bed."
____________
Ten Thoughts to Ponder
Number 10 Life is sexually transmitted.
Number 9 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Number 8 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him
without an erection, make him a sandwich..
Number 7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day, teach a
person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
Number 6 Some people are like a Slinky ... not really good for
anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
Number 5 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in
hospitals, dying of nothing.
Number 4 All of us could take a lesson from the weather.
It pays no attention to criticism.
Number 3 Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00, and a
substantial tax cut saves you only $30.00?
Number 2 In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird.
Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
And The Number 1 Thought Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers;
what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
____________
There were these two blondes driving along the highway looking
for a place to stop and picnic. The first blonde says,
"Let's stop here, and have our picnic under that tree."
The other says, "No! Let's have it right here in the middle of
the road."
They argued about it for a bit, but finally agreed to have it in
the middle of the road.
All of a sudden, a car comes speeding towards them and has to
swerve into the tree to keep from hitting them.
The one blonde says to the other,
"See? If we were under that tree, we'd be dead now!"
THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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