[PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner!



welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
where the world goes for its daily dose of humor!
(made in the USA)

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just hit reply to this email and...cya!!!!!!!

GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!

You know, when I saw this deal, I couldn't pass it up. How can you lose?
200 bux in hotel vouchers for 50 dollars. its a no brainer. While I don't
really travel that much, I plan on selling mine to the neighbor and make a
few dollars on em. works for me. Then I realized, hey, the postman fans
will want to know about this too, I'm sure they will want them...

HOTEL VOUCHERS...200$ for 50$

once upon a time a big time promotion got cancelled and orphaned these
poor little hotel gift cards. then product fairy appeared and priced them
to disappear. Buy 1 get three free!!!!200$ worth of hotel value for only
50 bux!
http://www.tinyurl.com/2sl3ea

And how bout some FREE SHOES TOO?


ZAPPOS
GET YOUR  FREE SHOES
So many styles to choose from, it's down-right ridiculous
http://www.tinyurl.com/37ymjq

Sorry for the brevity of this issue. I am a bit pressed for
time today. "The war department" went and spent my
hard earned money buying carpet, so I have two rooms
of carpet to install today.

We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman!

THE COMICS

takin it off
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/c011.html

yoga for the lonely guy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/c012.html

you are what you ate
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/c013.html

lousy spellers
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/c014.html

Custer's last stand
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/c015.html

why should I believe you?
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/c016.html

forget about it
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/c017.html

what do you mean?
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/c018.html

the nurse needs lessons
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/c019.html

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I
kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a
nearby table. My wife asked, "Do you know her?"
Yes," I sighed. "She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to
drinking
right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been
sober since."
"My God!" said my wife. "Who would think a person could go on
celebrating
that long?"
So you see, there really are two ways to look at everything.
_________________

Two Mexicans are riding along Pacific Coast Highway on a
 motorcycle.Theybreak down and start hitching a lift.
A friendly trucker stops to see
 if he can help and the Mexicans asks him
for a lift. He tells them he has no room in the truck as he is carrying
20,000 bowling balls. The Mexicans put it to the driver that if they
 can manage to fit in the back with their bike will he take them and he
 agrees. They manage to
squeeze themselves and their motorbike into the back of the truck so
 the driver shuts the doors and gets off on his way. By this time he is
 really late and so puts his foot down. Sure enough the Highway Patrol pulls
 him over for speeding. The good officer asks the driver what he is carrying
 to which he replies jokingly - "Mexican eggs". The policeman obviously
 doesn't believe this so wants to take a look. He opens the
back door and quickly shuts it and locks it. He gets on his radio and
 calls for immediate backup from as many officers as possible. The dispatcher
 asks what emergency he has that requires so many officers. I've got a truck
 with 20,000 Mexican eggs in it - 2 have hatched and
they've managed to steal a motorcycle already".
___________

I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my dog, Schatzi, and
was in line to check out. The woman behind me asked if I had a dog......
Duh!! I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her NO. I was
starting the Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd
ended up in the hospital the last time, but that I'd lost 50 lbs. before
I'd awakened in the intensive care unit with tubes coming out most of my
orifices and IV's in both arms. Her eyes bugged out of her head. I went
on with the bogus diet story and she was totally buying it. I told her
that it was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works is to
load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two
everytime you feel hungry. The package said the food is nutritionally
complete so I was going to try it again. I have to mention here that
practically everyone in the line was now enthralled with my story, ;
particularly the tall guy behind her. Horrified, she asked if something
in the dog food had poisoned me and was that why I ended up in the
hospital. I said no.... I'd been sitting in the middle of the street
licking my ass when a car hit me.
I thought the tall guy behind her was going to have to be carried out....
_____________

An Irishman was terribly overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet.
"I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this
procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you should have lost at least 5 pounds."
When the Irishman returned, he shocked the doctor by having lost nearly
30 pounds!
"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?"
The Irishman nodded..."I'll tell you though, by jaesuz,
I t'aut I were going to drop dead dat 3rd day."
"From hunger, you mean?"
"No, from f*cking 'skippin' " the Irishman said.
______________

Five best things to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk:

5. They told me at the Blood Bank that this might happen.

4. This is that 15 minute power nap they raved about in the time  management course you sent me to.

3. Whew! Guess I left the top off the whiteout......You probably got here just in time.

2. Did ya ever notice the sounds coming out of the keyboard when you put your ear down real close?

AND THE NUMBER ONE BEST THING TO SAY IF YOU GET CAUGHT SLEEPING AT YOUR DESK...

1. Raise your head slowly and say, '...in Jesus' name, Amen.'

BUFFALO's
Movies

Moose
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/125004.htm

Exam
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/12139.htm

Cargo
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/12146.htm
________________

Hunter 3
http://www.lablaughs.com/adult_toon.php?id=A19971003

Beer Goggles, my ass
http://www.lablaughs.com/adult_toon.php?id=A20060419

Wholesome 3 some
http://www.lablaughs.com/adult_toon.php?id=A19971012

THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman!















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