Plants gone potty!: [PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner

Oops is a word that I don't care
To hear as someone cuts my hair.
Another time it's not a thrill
Is when my dentist holds a drill.
An Oops! escaped from the pilot's lips
Can do me in on an airplane trip.
But nothing's worse than Oops that's spoken
When one finds out the condom's broken.
___________

you know its time for a diet when:

You dive into a swimming pool so your friends can go surfing.
You have to apply your makeup with a paint roller.
Weight Watchers demands your resignation.
You step on a pennyweight scale that gives you your fortune and it says,
"One at a time please!"
Your face is so full that you look like you're wearing horn-rimmed
contact lenses.
The bus driver asks you to sit on the other side because he wants to
make a turn without flipping over.
You're at school in the classroom and turn around and erase the entire
blackboard.
They throw puffed rice at your wedding.
You hiccup in your bathing suit, and it looks like someone adjusting a
venetian blind.
You fall down and try to get up, and in the process rock yourself to
sleep.
_____________

Although this married couple enjoyed their luxury fishing
boat together, it was the husband who was always behind the
wheel operating the boat. He was concerned about what might happen
in an emergency. So one day out on the lake he suddenly said to his wife,
"Ok honey, this is a drill. Pretend that I am having a heart attack.
You must get the boat safely to shore."
She was initially surprised and flustered, but she soon settled
down and was able to safely drive the boat to shore.
Later that evening, the wife walked into the living room where her
husband was watching television. She sat down next to him, grabbed
the remote control, switched the channel, and said to him,
"OK honey, this is a drill. Pretend I'm having a heart attack.
You must set the table, cook dinner, and wash the dishes."
___________

Q: How are an apple and a I.R.S. agent alike?
A: They both look good hanging from a tree.

Q: What if mini-skirts got any shorter?
A: Well, there'll be two more cheeks to powder and much more hair to comb.
_________

THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman

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Plants gone potty!

[PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner

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