THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
The trick is to make sure you don't
die waiting for prosperity to come.
Lee Iacocca
___________
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
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THE COMICS
a new bra
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t001.html
I pulled a muscle
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t002.html
a new movie
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t003.html
six inches
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t004.html
watch it
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t005.html
great trunk
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t006.html
got away
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t007.html
redneck style
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t008.html
why I do laundry
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t009.html
car accident
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t010.html
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LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Steve Bridges as President Obama - August 2011
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a2038.html
Internet stars,south park
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a2039.html
Worst Magic Act Ever
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a2040.html
ALF - Comedy Video 1.0 "English"
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a2041.html
Three dead bodies turned up at the mortuary, all with very big smiles
on their faces.
The coroner called the police to tell them what had happened.
'First body: Pierre Dubois, Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure while
making love to his 20-year old mistress. Hence the enormous smile,
Inspector', said the Coroner.
'Second body: Hamish Campbell, Scotsman, 25, won £50,000 on the
lottery, spent it all on whisky. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the
smile.'
The Inspector asked, 'What about the third body?'
'Ah,' said the coroner, 'this is the most unusual one. Paddy Murphy,
Irish, 30, struck by lightning.'
'Why is he smiling then?' inquired the Inspector.
'He thought he was having his picture taken'
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A Zebra dies and arrives at the Pearly Gates...
As he enters, he asks St. Peter, 'I have a question that's
haunted me all of my days on earth. Am I white with
black stripes, or am I black with white stripes?'
St. Peter said, 'That's a question only God can answer.'
So the zebra went off in search of God.
When he found Him, the zebra asked, 'God, please - I
must know Am I white with black stripes, or am I black with white stripes?'
God simply replied 'You are what you are.'
The zebra returned to see St. Peter once more, who asked him, 'Well, did God
straighten out your query for you?'
The zebra looked puzzled.. 'No sir, God simply said 'You are what you are.''
St. Peter smiled and said to the zebra,
'Well then, there you are. You are white with black stripes..'
The zebra asked St. Peter, 'How do you know that for certain?'
'Because,' said St. Peter, 'If you were black with white
stripes, God would have said, 'You is what you is..'
WARNING: If you laugh at this, Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, Rev Wright
and Obama will be comin after yo ass!!!
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A friend of mine was sitting on a lawn, sunning and reading,
when he was startled by a fairly late model car crashing through
a hedge and coming to rest on his lawn.He helped the elderly driver
out and sat her on a lawn chair.
"My goodness" he exclaimed, "you are quite old to be driving!"
"Yes", she replied," I am old enough that I don't need a license."
"The last time I went to my doctor, he examined me and asked if I
had a driver's license. I told him "yes" and handed it to him.
He took scissors out of a drawer, cut the license into pieces
and threw them in the wastebasket."
"You won't be needing this anymore," he said.
So I thanked him and left !
_____________
This is the story of the blonde flying in a two-seater airplane with just the pilot.
The pilot has a heart attack and dies... She, frantic, calls out a May Day.
"May Day! May Day! Help me! Help me! My pilot had a heart attack and is dead.
And I don't know how to fly. Help me! Oh my God, Please help me!"
She hears a voice over the radio saying:
"This is Air Traffic Control and I have you loud and clear. I will talk
you through this and get you back on the ground. I've had a lot of experience with this kind of problem.
'Now, just take a deep breath. Everything will be fine! Now give me your height and position."
She says, "I'm 5'4" and I support Obama."
"O.K." says the voice on the radio....
"Repeat after me: Our Father. . Who art in Heaven. . . .."
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THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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