THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
Guns have only two enemies – rust and politicians
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Ever notice how technoledgy changes the
world we live in?
We do hope you enjoy today's issue
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
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THE COMICS
hey Dad
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z061.html
little rascal
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z062.html
the bride
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z063.html
aging seminar
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z064.html
Tiger Woods
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z065.html
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LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Simon's cat
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1476.html
peaceful day
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a1477.html
A man took a young woman to an X-rated movie, purchased some
refreshments and showed his date to her seat. Soon after the onscreen
action started, she put her hand on the man's lap. Looking over at him,
she remarked: "I see this is getting you excited, too. But how come it's so cold?"
"Because you're jerking off my popsicle!" the man replied.
__________________
An unemployed young man saw a Help Wanted sign outside a large
convention center. He went in and applied for the job.
"We have a major business convention tomorrow - some of the most important
executives in the world will be coming! I need someone who
will take care of security, check the invitations, give directions,
etc. You will stand at the front door. Can you do it?" said the manager.
"Oh, YES SIR!" said the young man.
The following night the manager gave final instructions.
"THIS IS YOUR JOB DESCRIPTION AND A LIST OF YOUR DUTIES! You need to be
paying attention! I need your full cooperation! You HAVE to do this job
correctly! I have put these directions on this paper!" he
said, handing it to the young man. "Remember! The guests remain on the
convention floor! The rest of the center is being used! And keep things
clean! And the floor is slippery! Be careful! And you are SECURITY! So keep order!"
"Yes, SIR!" said the idiot enthusiastically.
An hour later, the convention was going well and the manager was
greeting the executives. Then he heard something strange. He went
outside and his mouth dropped open in shock. He saw a very
distinguished gentleman, an impeccably dressed, handsome and dignified city
executive in a $3,000 navy blue pin-striped business suit, carefully knotted red
silk tie, starched white shirt, hundred dollar haircut and silver cuff links.
However, this corporate executive was barefoot! In addition, he was down on
all fours and cleaning the floor with a scrub brush!
The idiot, now the security guard and greeter, was yelling orders and in one hand
he held a pair of highly polished Italian leather loafers.
In the other he held a pair of black silk business socks.
"Please! This is an Armani suit! It's getting WET!" begged the executive.
"And when can I put my shoes and socks back on?"
"No questions, and get to work!" snapped the idiot, and slapped the
soles of the executive's bare feet. The executive shuddered.
The manager ran over to the businessman and helped him up. The
executive's face was beet red with anger and humiliation.
"You will be SUED! This is an outrage! He pushed me down and pulled
these right off my feet! Give me those! He told me to start scrubbing or
he would use his gun!" yelled the executive, and he grabbed his
shiny expensive shoes and socks from the young man.
"What are you doing?!" shouted the manager to the idiot, in shock.
"How dare you?!"
The idiot looked bewildered.
"But I'm just following directions, sir! You said: Keep things clean!
Keep order!"
The manager yelled: "He was BAREFOOT on ALL FOURS and wearing an ARMANI SUIT!"
The idiot said: "But it says right here: `KEEP GUESTS ON THE FLOOR AT ALL TIMES! NO EXCEPTIONS!"
The manager groaned. "But what about his SHOES? Why did you take them away from him? Are you crazy?
The idiot pointed at his job description: "NO LOAFERS WILL BE TOLERATED!"
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THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
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