[PostmansCorner] THE POSTMAN'S CORNER/Saturday

 











Welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!

GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!

So, yesterday was a bit of a bad day. COPD flair
up....sometimes those of us who suffer with it get "one
of them kinda moments", you know? It did slow me
down a bit but fortunately, no hospital stay required.
Usually I get stuck for a few days while they "clean me out".
It was one of "them kinda days too, for Senator Collins from
Maine. She announced her vote for the supreme court yesterday.
As a conservative it obviously was NOT what a lot of her
constituents wanted. The announcement was said to generate
over 2 million dollars worth of campaign dollars...for the
opposing side :) Apparently Senator, you are about as unpopular
with the Dems as president Trump. (I'm smilin)
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
PS...my only fear of death is that when I reach that point
I will be a registered Democrat.


__________________
THE FUNNY PAPERS

the answer is no
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0076.html

do you ever look at stuff and wonder
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0077.html

a bathing cap?
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0078.html

be afraid
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0079.html

thru with begging
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0080.html

the weather
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0081.html

I thought you said
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0082.html

band width
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0083.html

October
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0084.html

you went too far
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0085.html

goes into the store to buy condoms
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0086.html

not the way you do it
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0087.html

innocent
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0088.html

be brave
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0089.html

beauty
http://thepostmanscorner.net/toon8/ct0090.html


I put bubble-wrap under the mattress during sex.
It sounds like fireworks and makes for a more festive mood.

On a lonely, moonlit country road a young man's car
engine started to cough. Immediately pulling over to
a scenic little spot he said to the young lady next to him,
"That's funny, I wonder what that knocking noise was?"
"I'll tell you one thing for sure," said the girl coolly,
"It wasn't opportunity."

An elderly couple are sitting around one evening and
the man says to his wife,
"Marsha, we are about to celebrate our 60th wedding
anniversary. We've had a wonderful life
together, full of contentment and blessings. But there's
something I've always wondered about.
Tell me the truth. Have you ever been unfaithful to me?"
She hesitates a moment, then says, "Yes, three times, Sidney."
"Three times? How could that happen?" Sidney asks.
The wife begins recalling slowly,
"Well, do you remember right after we were married
and we were so broke, and the bank was going to
foreclose on our little house?"
"Yes, dear, that was really a terrible time" replies the man.
Marsha continued, "And remember when I went to see the
banker one night and the next day the bank extended our loan?"
"That's hard to take" the man says, "but I guess it really was
for us, so I can forgive you. What was the second time?"
"Well," she continued, "do you remember years later
when you almost died from the heart problem
because we couldn't afford the operation?"
"Yes, of course" the man replies.
"Then you will remember that right after I went to see
the doctor, he did your operation at no cost?" she explained.
"That's true" Sidney nodded. "That shocks me, Marsha,
but I do understand that you did it out of love
for me, and I forgive you. So, what was the third time?"
?Marsha lowers her head and says, "Sidney, do you remember
when you ran for Country Club President and you needed 62 more votes.
_________________

An American is having breakfast one morning
(coffee, croissants, bread, butter and jam)
when a Frenchman, chewing gum, sits down next to him.
The American ignores the Frenchman who, nevertheless,
starts a conversation.
Frenchman: "You American folk eat the whole bread??"
American (in a bad mood): "Of course."
Frenchman: (after blowing a huge bubble) "We don't.
In France, we only eat what's inside.
The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it,
transform them into croissants and sell them to the states."
The Frenchman has a smirk on his face.
The American listens in silence.
The Frenchman persists: "Do you eat jelly with the bread?"
American: "Of Course."
Frenchman: (cracking his gum between his teeth and chuckling).
"We don't. In France we eat fresh fruit for breakfast,
then we put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers,
recycle them, transform them into jam and sell the jam to the states."
The American then asks: "Do you have sex in France?"
Frenchman: "Why of course we do", he says with a big smirk.
American: "And what do you do with the condoms once you've used them?"
Frenchman: "We throw them away, of course."
American: "We don't. In America, we put them in a container, recycle them,
melt them down into chewing gum and sell them to France."

Q: Why are pubic hairs curly? A: So you don't poke your eye out.
______________
JOKES

he had to attend a meeting
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0046.html

on the eve of a big offensive
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0047.html

computer programming jobs
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0048.html

your son
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0049.html

on a pilgrimage to a healing spring
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0050.html

God created earth
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0051.html

Did anyone tell you what to say in court
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0052.html

retired
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0053.html

An old man goes to a diner every day for lunch
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0054.html

sister had been ill
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0055.html

a Michigan fan
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0056.html

How much do you weigh
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0057.html

discussing marriage
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0058.html

the journey of a thousand miles
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0059.html

educational grants
http://thepostmanscorner.net/joke7/kl0060.html


_______________________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES

Simple Acts of Kindness - Give it a try
http://thepostmanscorner.net/movie7/mv0042.html

NEVER TELL ME THE ODDS COMPILATION
http://thepostmanscorner.net/movie7/mv0043.html

Biggest Unexpected waves Caught On Camera
http://thepostmanscorner.net/movie7/mv0044.html

Laurel &Hardy Delivering the piano.
http://thepostmanscorner.net/movie7/mv0045.html

RC Spruce Goose
http://thepostmanscorner.net/movie7/mv0046.html

OLD MAN TELLS FUNNIEST JOKE EVER!
http://thepostmanscorner.net/movie7/mv0047.html

Alarm clock and getting up | Mr Bean Official
http://thepostmanscorner.net/movie7/mv0048.html

Best Stand up comedy sketch ever!
http://thepostmanscorner.net/movie7/mv0049.html



















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Posted by: "Martin a.k.a. the postman" <martin7957@yahoo.com>
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