WELCOME TO:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
'It has been said that politics is the second oldest profession.
I have learned that it bears a striking resemblance to the first'
- Ronald Reagan
HELLO POSTMAN FANS!
Did you know, there are a LOT of expenses that are NOT
Covered by Medicare? The war department
is just turning 65 this year. Boy, are we finding that out...
A TIP FROM THE POSTMAN:
Start saving up to 75% on healthcare services
not covered by Medicare
Planting and Reaping (You reap what you sow)
If you plant honesty, You will reap trust.
If you plant humility, You will reap greatness.
If you plant perseverance, You will reap victory.
If you plant consideration, You will reap harmony.
If you plant hard work, You will reap success.
If you plant forgiveness, You will reap reconciliation.
If you plant openness, You will reap intimacy.
If you plant patience, You will reap improvements.
If you plant faith, You will reap miracles
If you plant dishonesty, You will reap distrust.
If you plant selfishness, You will reap loneliness
If you plant pride, You will reap destruction.
If you plant envy, You will reap trouble.
If you plant laziness, You will reap stagnation.
If you plant bitterness, You will reap isolation.
If you plant greed, You will reap loss.
If you plant gossip, You will reap enemies.
If you plant sin, You will reap guilt.
So be careful what you plant now, it will determine
what you will reap tomorrow. The seeds you
now scatter, will make life worse or better for you
or the ones who will come after. Yes, someday, you
will enjoy the fruits, or you will pay for the
choices you plant today.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
___________________
THE FUNNY PAPERS
expectations and reality
thanks Grandma
life
this is why
halfway through
what can I do
I may be old
your back tail light is out
lost my mommy
at home depot
are you sure Pete?
on the bottom shelf
photogenic
what my eyes saw
a woman's place
__________________
This guy wakes up out of a deep sleep and, feeling real horny,
nudges his wife awake and asks,
" Why don't we get it on, eh?"
?She replies "I have an appointment at the gynecologist tomorrow
and you know I don't like to make love the night before."
So the husband agrees and rolled back over and started to go
back to sleep.
A few minutes later, he nudges his wife again and asks,
"You don't by any chance have a dentist's
appointment tomorrow, do you?"
A popular newspaper was carrying out a survey on sexual habits
and one questioner stopped an elderly Italian
gentleman in the street who was wearing a black suit and asked
him how often he had sexual intercourse.
"Oh, about half a dozen times a year", said the gentleman.
The questioner smiled.
"I thought you Italians were supposed to be sexy!" she said.
We are," said the gentleman.
"But, I don't think half a dozen times a year is so bad for a
seventy-two year old priest with no car."
Little Johnny and his grandfather have gone fishing.
After a while grandpa gets thirsty and opens up his cooler for some beer.
Little Johnny asks, "Grandpa, can I have some beer too?"
"Can you stick your penis in your asshole?" grandpa asked back.
"No."
"Well, then you're not big enough."
Grandpa then takes out a cigarette and lights up.
Little Johnny sees this and asks for a cigarette.
"Can you stick your penis in your asshole?" grandpa asked again.
"No."
"Well, then you're not big enough."
Little Johnny gets upset and pulls out some cookies.
His grandfather says, "Hey, those cookies look good, can I have some?"
Little Johnny asks, "Can you stick your penis in your asshole?"
Grandpa looks at Johnny and senses his trick, so he says,
"Well of course I can, I'm big enough."
Little Johnny then says,
"Well, then go fuck yourself, these are my cookies."
________________
JOKES
a bowel movement
Murphys laws
a US marine and an Iraqi terrorist
q and a
one Sunday morning
the computer programmer
Slackers rules
a bucket chicken and a State trooper
goes to see the pope
Monday morning in the logging camp
Our Army physical-training program
teaching her to swim
wife nags you
did you trail my husband
a grave digger
______________________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Happy TrickOween!!! ***Little Rascals*** Spooky Hooky
The Rich Beggar
Cow Intelligence & ability. Smart cattle
Why can't you go faster than light?
Bait Phone 2 - basically a stun gun with a remote
Judge busted on the job by Rob Wolchek
12 MOST FEARLESS ANIMALS
Adumu
_____________________
A LITTLE BIT OF HUMOR
3 blocks from home
a tatoo
in Canada
the next time
flyers on my car
a slice of apple pie
Priscilla says hi
prevent skid marks
my pet mouse
clap your hands
__._,_.___
Posted by: "Martin a.k.a. the postman" <martin7957@yahoo.com>
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