welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
HELLO POSTMAN FANS!
Always remember these five important rules when
asking a man to do something:
1. Make sure the man is conscious.
1a. Then give him a Blow Job
2. Crash the hard drive on his computer and line the
bird cage with the sports section.
Then give a blow job
3. Be brief! Limit your nagging harangue to two,
three, or four hours, max.
3b. Then ... give him a Blow Job
4. Reward him for cooperative behavior. A blow job
will usually do just fine. Or, offer to cook him something
that doesn't have a peel-back cover.
5. Punish him when he refuses to cooperate.
Microwave his remote on high power for 55 minutes.
Rotate 1/4 turn, and microwave again for another 35 minutes.
Or, threaten to not give him a blow job.
6. Use "would you" or "will you" instead of "you'd better"
or "do as I say and no one will get hurt".
7. When all else fails ... Blow Job.
OK, seven rules.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_________________
THE FUNNY PAPERS
best I phone cover
if you were gas
you are such a hottie
wrestling
what's on your mind
the door closes
teacher punishing
Swift
your missing husband
a hormone
can;t control everything
minding your own business
tired of being a good boy
I'm so glad
Henrietta
_______________
JOKES
Bernie, the aeronautical engineer
traveling alone in Italy
a jury trial
taking up a new sport
a blonde girl that wasn't too bright
a stray rabbbid dog
the weather was fantastic
arrested for selling whiskey
what's wrong Nadine
at area 51
visitor's day at the lunatic asylum
ticket please
mom how are you
A man and his dog were walking along a road
filling out a job application
A father buys a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie.
He decides to test it out at dinner one night.
The father asks his son what he did that afternoon.
The son says, "I did some schoolwork."
The robot slaps the son.
The son says, "Ok, Ok. I was at a friend's house watching movies."
Dad asks, "What movie did you watch?"
Son says, "Toy Story."
The robot slaps the son.
Son says, "Ok, Ok, we were watching porn
Dad says, "What? At your age I didn't even know what porn was."
The robot slaps the father.
Mom laughs and says, "Well, he certainly is your son."
The robot slaps the mother.
Robot for sale.
The room service waiter at the Naples Ritz Carlton, after
setting up a table for an elaborate dinner for two, asked,
"Will there be anything else, sir?"
"No, thank you," the gentleman replied. "That will be all."
As the waiter turned to leave, he noticed a beautiful satin negligee on the bed..
"Anything for your wife?" he asked.
"Yeah! Now that you mentioned it, that's a good idea," the gent said.
"Can you please bring up a postcard!"
When asked by their host if she would like another drink, t
he attractive blonde bowed her head slightly and said, "No thank you.
My husband limits me to one drink."
"Why is that," the host asked? Her reply... "Because after one drink I can feel it;
after two drinks ...anyone can!"
_______________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
15 Jobs That Will Disappear In The Next 20 Years Due To AI
Top 10 Executed Criminals' Last Words
How To Not Drive Your Car
HERE ARE 45 EXAMPLES OF WHY CYCLISTS ARE DISLIKED
Unbelievable 9 Hippos Attack Crocodile to save Zebra
Face to Face With A Mountain Lion
Karate Prank NYC
The Soup Nazi
10 Mind Blowing Optical Illusions
Deer Saves Boy from Hypothermia - It's A Miracle
Jokes that will make you laugh so hard 2017
Best Mouse Trap Ever, How To Make Bucket Mouse Trap
Live PD: I Need Backup | A&E
25 Mind Blowing Hidden Rooms and Secret Storage
FARTING GYM INSTRUCTOR PRANK!
____________________
A LITTLE BIT OF HUMOR
everything is fine
my husband told me
don't wait
when uncle Joe died
game of dice
a naked woman
out of nowhere
everything I like
not offensive to anybody
meaning
__._,_.___
Posted by: "Martin a.k.a. the postman" <martin7957@yahoo.com>
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