welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
So, is your little corner of the world going into "heat wave" mode
like us here in 'beautiful West Michigan'? It was in the low 80s this
morning. and increasingly hot as the day progresses. It is time for
me to turn in to a pumpkin as the weather goes crazy this weekend.
I most likely will not venture out of the AC. Glad I have it.
The weather guy said the heat index tomorrow is gonna be around
105. Bummer.
In case you were wondering, I am publishing a more abbreviated page
for a couple of days, the reason? My wrists are suffering that age old
carpel tunnel syndrome again. Bummer. I may possibly take a couple days off
carpel tunnel syndrome again. Bummer. I may possibly take a couple days off
as we get closer to the fourth,also . We will see how that goes. But then again,
without going anywhere all day, I get pretty bored, too. There is only
so many movies you can watch on Showtime or HBO, right? Anyways...
lets do some jokes!
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
cordially
Martin aka the postman
A pig walks into a bar and orders a beer. After drinking it,
he hops off the bar stool,
pees on the floor and leaves.
Another pig comes in, drinks his beer,
Another pig comes in, drinks his beer,
pees on the floor and leaves.A third and forth piggy
come in and do the same exact thing.
Finally, a fifth piggy comes in to the bar and orders a beer.
Finally, a fifth piggy comes in to the bar and orders a beer.
After finishing his beer,
he gets off the bar stool and begins to walk out the door.
Before reaching the door, the bartender yells -
Before reaching the door, the bartender yells -
"Hey Pig ...aren't you
going to pee on the floor like the others?"
To which the pig replies - "No you idiot! Everyone
To which the pig replies - "No you idiot! Everyone
knows that the last little
piggy goes WEE WEE WEE - all the way home!"
The pilot was sitting in his seat and pulled out a .38
revolver.He placed it on top of the instrument panel,
then asked the navigator,
"Do you know what I use this for?"
The navigator replied timidly, "No, what's it for?"
The pilot responded, "I use this on navigators
The navigator replied timidly, "No, what's it for?"
The pilot responded, "I use this on navigators
who get me lost!" The navigator proceeded to pull out a
.45 and place it on his chart table.
The pilot asked, "What's that for?"
"To be honest sir," the navigator replied,
The pilot asked, "What's that for?"
"To be honest sir," the navigator replied,
"I'll know we're lost before you will."
_________________
A group of expectant fathers sat nervously in the hall.
_________________
A group of expectant fathers sat nervously in the hall.
A nurse beckoned to one
of them and said, "Congratulations, you have a son!"
Another man dropped his magazine, jumped up and cried,
Another man dropped his magazine, jumped up and cried,
"Hey, what's the idea?
I got here two hours before he did!"
Little Johnny and his family lived in the country, and as a
result, they seldom had guests.
Johnny was eager to help his mother after his father
appeared with two dinner guests from the office.
When the dinner was nearly over, Little Johnny went
When the dinner was nearly over, Little Johnny went
to the kitchen and proudlycarried in the first piece of
apple pie, giving it to his father, who passed it to a guest.
Little Johnny came in with a second piece of pie and gave
it to his father, who again gave it to a guest.
This was too much for Little Johnny, who said,
This was too much for Little Johnny, who said,
"It's no use, Dad. The pieces are all the same size."
__._,_.___
Posted by: "Martin a.k.a. the postman" <martin7957@yahoo.com>
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