Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
Got this message from Yahoo today which explains the difficulties
posting today.
As all too many of you experienced this week, a misconfiguration in
one of our sets of MTA servers caused many messages this week
to be delayed or to fail to post altogether.
The good news is that the problem should have been resolved this
morning, July 8th, around 2 am Pacific Daylight time (9 am GMT).
I think that is kind of an appropriate name for the server, because
just like the song of the same name by the Kingston Trio my mail
to you will ride forever thru cyberspace as the Mail That Never
Returned.
To those who are old enough to remember that song, I am sorry
if you spend the rest of the day with that song stuck in your head.
On the family front, I was talking to my sister Lisa regarding our
ancestors on the Brabant side of the family and received the
following back.
I used to ignore the Brabant's in Louisiana and Ohio and Florida- but
we all seem to go back to Dr Pierre Brabant who came from France. Every
Brabant had a dozen children- I was one of 10- so there are a lot of us.
Brabant spent 400 years in Quebec. The Acadians were chased out in 1750
by the British. Many went down the Mississippi and helped spread us
further. Therefore, I watch Swamp People and look for possible
relatives."
The French started exploring Canada in the early 1500's not long after
Christopher Columbus and obviously our ancestors were some of the
first to settle up there. I have been watching Swamp People since the
series started and haven't seen any Brabant's but our side of the family
is probably smart enough to not wrestle alligators.
Enjoy the chips... buffalo
HFcartoons
Monday to Friday 3 clean cartoons and a bonus
delivered direct to your inbox.
To join send a blank e-mail to
hfcartoons-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
And
**Attention Group & List Owners**
Looking for new members?
Come join our Ad-Swap Group.
We accept both "Clean" & "Adult" ads.
No X Rated or porn groups/list allowed.
You choose how many ads you want to swap, from 1 to 7.
A "template" is given, to show who to swap with each week.
You can save it in your favorites...(it will change each week),
along with a separate page showing the swap members ads.
Click here to join
http://tech.groups.yahoo.com/group/CleanAdSwaps/
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please visit our Sponsor
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eggies - As Seen On TV!
Finally, you can enjoy hard boiled eggs without peeling a single shell -
just crack, cook and twist!
The Eggies system is convenient, making it perfect for working
professionals, stay-at-home moms,
babysitters and grandparents.
Order 1 Eggies system now and receive a 2nd set free (just pay
additional P&H), plus get 2 free egg slicers.
http://buffaloschips.com/eggies
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Camel Toe Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Forget mistletoe. This year I'm kissing girls under their cameltoe
instead.
I told my girlfriend to wear a skirt to prevent her cameltoe from
showing. What does she do? Doesn't wear panties and flashes the guys at
the bar.
Is anybody else watching the beach volleyball purely for the cameltoe?
Once I spot a cameltoe, it's actually impossible to ignore.
Been watching the winter Olympics all week, I have seen literally
hundreds of lithesome young things in skin tight Lycra, and not one
fucking cameltoe. Anyone want to buy a catering pack of Kleenex?
Be honest, we've all accidentally caught a glance at a man readjusting
his balls in public.
But i've never seen a woman pull out a cameltoe in the same situation.
I've just seen a fucking great picture of a camel toe.
It was stamping on a Muslims head.
My son came up to me and said "Dad, What's a camel toe?"
I thought fuck, where did he learn that from?
"Well son, I spluttered "It's the outline of the ladies pee pee in her
underwear.
He looked at me confused. "Why do you want to know son?"
"We have a school project about different types of travel around the
world. I'm doing the desert caravan at the moment. Just wondered if
camels pull stuff like huskies do".
A recent study found that almost 9% of women's swimsuits provide poor
coverage in the gusset area. Notable issues were spiders legs, cameltoe
and the odd stray flap.
A follow up study of fitting room privacy at fashion retailers has been
delayed pending the lifting of a restraining order.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Little Johnny Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Little Johnny went to his first school dance. He didn't know if he
would ever get up the nerve to ask a girl out to dance.
As the night went on everybody was dancing except Little Johnny. He
just sat in the corner looking at everyone having fun.
Finally as the last song started to play Little Johnny spotted two
very cute girls across the room sitting at their table. He walked
over and asked one if she would like to dance. She looked him up and
down and said "I am sorry but I am very particular with whom I dance
with."
Little Johnny being the smart boy that he is, replied, "You can dam
will see that I am not."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The New Stylish and Decorative Way to Hydrate Flowers and Plants All
Year Long!
Mizu Pods are the easy, attractive way to add style to your house while
keeping your plants
healthy. Simply Soak the Mizu Pods in water and watch them grow. You
can use Mizu Pods
to create unique party favors, develop beautiful arrangements, or give
holiday gifts.
Order 5 tubes for $10 and get 5 tubes free (just pay additional P&H).
Order Now!
http://buffaloschips.com/mizu
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The highly religious young man entered his wedding chamber and was
shocked to find his new young bride awaiting him, spread-eagle and
naked on their bed. "My dear!" he exclaimed, "I expected to find you
beside our bed and on your knees!" "OK," she said, obediently
changing positions, "but I always get the hiccups when I screw in
that position."
"I'm so upset," said Hershberg to his Rabbi. "I took my son-in-law
into my clothing business and yesterday I caught him kissing one of
the models!" "Have a little patience!" advised the Rabbi. "After
all, guys will be guys. So he kissed one of the models, it's not so
terrible." "But you don't understand," said Hershberg. "I make men's
clothes!"
It had been a rather harrowing day at work. She decided instead of
going right home, she would stop in the local tavern for a few
drinks first. She walked inside, and she sat down. The bartender
came over and asked what she would like to have, and she replied, "I
want a sanitary belt." He replied, "Huh? Lady, this is a tavern, not
a drugstore!" She said to him, "Sure, and you can give me a sanitary
belt!" "HOW?" the bartender replied. The blonde rolled her eyes, and
then she asked him, "Are you SURE you're qualified for this job?"
"Yes, I am sure," replied the bartender. Now you tell me what you
want by a 'sanitary belt.'" "HELLOOOO?" replied the blonde, "I want
a shot of whiskey in a CLEAN GLASS! THAT would make it a SANITARY
BELT!" (Ross Bowen)
Stan Kegel
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Comfy Control
Comfy Control Harness is a new humane harness that's lightweight and
easily adjustable. It's special design allows for maximum comfort and
safety every time you walk your dog. Comfy Control Harness is designed
to move the pressure away from your dog's neck and on to the shoulders
and back. It will not constrict your dog's breathing so it's perfect for
dogs with short snouts or breathing problems. NO buckles and NO awkward
adjusting! Available in sizes: small, medium, large, and extra-large.
Custom adjusts in seconds
Easy clip on matching 5 foot leash
Open weave design allows air flow
Doesn't constrict breathing
Stylish vest slips right on
TO ORDER
http://buffaloschips.com/comfy
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A guy walked into the doctor's office for an appointment. "Would you
like to tell me your problem?" the pretty receptionist asked.
"I'll need the information for the doctor."
"It's rather embarrassing," the guy stammered. "You see, I have a
very large and almost constant erection."
"Well, the doctor is very busy today," the receptionist cooed, "but
maybe I can squeeze you in."
Joe runs into Mike at the hardware store. "I heard you're dating
Carol lately," says Joe.
Mike replies, "That's right; I am."
Joe asks, "Man, how can you stand to look at her? I'm sorry, Mike,
but that gal is UGLY!"
Mike answers, "That's okay, Buddy! All I ever see is the top of her
head, and she has pretty hair!"
Linda's son was in the process of being potty trained.
One summer day, he came in from outside, all wet. Linda asked,
"Did you have an accident?"
Yes, he replied. Well, what did you do, water the trees, the bushes
?"
"Oh, no," he replied. "I went in the garage."
Shocked, Linda responded, "Well, you shouldn't do that.
It will start to stink, draw flies;
now I'll have to go out and hose down the garage."
Her son replied cheerfully: " But Mom, it's OK, I didn't go in our
garage, I went in Jill's garage!!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Selling Gold Jewelry? Know Its Value Before You Send it!
The Gold911 FREE online Price Your Gold Calculator Tells You How Much
Cash to Expect Before Sending It In
No More Worries About Low-Ball Offers
Learn the Value* of Each Gold Setting
Know Up Front How Much Cash to Expect
*Approximate Value. Final Value Depends Upon Market Price at Time of
Assay
Gold911 Buys Gold of Any Kind and Offers Sellers:
Insurance Protection Up to $1,000
Payment in 24 Hours by Check or Direct Deposit
Satisfaction Guaranteed
See Our Price Your Gold Calculator Now. CLICK HERE
http://buffaloschips.com/gold
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Raffle Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There is a raffle at the local Jewish Community Centre
and prizes are being drawn.
"4th prize, which goes to Hymie Himmelfarb, is a Rolls
Royce." Huge applause.
Hymie goes up to collect his keys and shake hands.
"3rd prize, which goes to Frank Myers, is a Rolls Royce
and a cheque for £10,000."
Huge applause. Frank goes up to collect his keys and
cheque and shake hands.
"2nd prize, which goes to Abe Epstein, is a piece of
fruit cake!"
Ghastly silence. Abe goes up to the stage to the
presenter.
"What do you mean, a piece of fruit cake? 4th prize was
a Rolls Royce, 3rd prize was a Rolls Royce plus a cheque
for £10,000, so what the hell do you mean a piece of
fruit cake for the second prize?"
"Ah," says the presenter, "This is special fruit cake.
It's made by the Rabbi's wife"
"F**k the Rabbi's wife" says Abe, hysterically.
"What? You want the 1st prize as well?" came the reply.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Magic Mesh door cover instantly opens and magically snaps closed behind
you using 18 strategically placed magnets.
Whether you have your hands full or a forgetful family member you can
still let fresh air in and keep those bugs out.
Buy one, get one free! $19.95 - just pay additional $7.95 P&H.
http://buffaloschips.com/magmes
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Skidboot
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/V/Sk.html
carolyn w/ Loving You~Elvis
http://carolynspreciousmemories.com/elvis/lovingyou.html
A Tribute Song for Caylee Via Carol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLudQC0MBJU
Marlene.NewPage/Be careful of Stones that you throw
http://www.wtv-zone.com/summerhoosier3/html2/BeCarefulOfStones.html
Chalk Art 4!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chalkart4.html
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Get Crispy Food Fast From Your Microwave
The Perfect Micro Crisper turns your microwave into a gourmet-reheating
machine, turning those drab and soggy leftovers back into tasty meals.
You can cook, brown, fry, crisp and more right in your microwave. The
Perfect Micro Grill is uniquely designed with raised ridges that drain
fat away during the cooking process, letting the food sear and adding
flavor without grease.
Limited time offer so act now.
Click the link below for more information:
http://buffaloschips.com/crispfo
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Surfin Surfari
BETTY FORD PASSES AWAY AT 93
http://deathbeeper.com/0173201.html
World Atlas
http://www.graphicmaps.com/geoquiz/thelist.htm
Virtual Ice Cream Cones
http://www.cybercones.com/
Real Weed Bust!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/weedbust.html
City That Time Forgot!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/city.html
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Hello,
We wanted to inform you today that you can now download a program
online that will allow you to watch unlimited television from around
the world right on your PC!
Press Here to watch TV from around the world on your PC:
http://buffaloschips.com/comptv
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
FX WebDesign PSP Hints
http://www.nightshadowfx.com/tips/hints8.shtml
Free E-Book Creation Via Wesley
http://www.myebook.com/
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
We would like to know if you would be interested in working from
home in your spare time writing short articles for us. You will be
paid $25.00 - $45.00 per hour writing these articles.
We will also pay you $12.00 - $50.00 per hour for posing in blogs,
and up to $450 for each fiction or non fiction story we ask you to
write.
Press here if you are interested:
http://buffaloschips.com/fhwn
All my best,
Freelance Home Writers Network
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Animal World
True Duck Tale
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/duck.html
Kitty Korner
http://www.i-love-cats.com/cat-articles/6-Important-Cat-Facts.html
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Hi,
We would like to show you why you may be "fat" and why you're unable
to lose weight no matter how hard you try.
First off, please always know that it's not your fault...
Press here to see why you're fat:
http://buffaloschips.com/fat
After you see what the problem is, you will see how easy it is to
finally lose the fat that you want to lose.
Thank you!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Movie Links
Gym
http://www.buffaloschips.com/dss.htm
Handling Road Rage
http://www.buffaloschips.com/nbjkk.htm
Home & Garden TV
http://www.buffaloschips.com/allka.htm
Hot Tub Mishap
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jkjkkol.htm
How To Get A Divorce
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jkhkjh.htm
McRonalds
http://www.buffaloschips.com/2wds.htm
My First Rescue
http://www.buffaloschips.com/yh.htm
Never Underestimate An Old Girl
http://www.buffaloschips.com/67t.htm
Obongo 08
http://www.buffaloschips.com/iuhj8.htm
Oeufs Poussins
http://www.buffaloschips.com/trfu.htm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rejection Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Top 10 Rejection Lines Given By Women (and what they actually
mean...)
10. I think of you as a brother.
(You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in "Deliverance.")
9. There's a slight difference in our ages.
(You are one jurassic geezer.)
8. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way.
(You are the ugliest dork I've ever laid eyes upon.)
7. My life is too complicated right now.
(I don't want you spending the whole night or else you may hear
phone
calls from all the other guys I'm seeing.)
6. I've got a boyfriend
(who's really my male cat and a half gallon of Ben and Jerry's).
5. I don't date men where I work.
(Hey, bud, I wouldn't even date you if you were in the same 'solar
system', much less the same building.)
4. It's not you, it's me.
(It's not me, it's you.)
3. I'm concentrating on my career.
(Even something as boring and unfulfilling as my job is better than
dating you.)
2. I'm celibate.
(I've sworn off only the men like you.)
....and the number 1 rejection line given by women
1. Let's be friends.
(I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating detail
about all the other men I meet and have sex with. It's that male
perspective thing)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cinema
http://www.buffaloschips.com/lk546k.htm
Clap Bra
http://www.buffaloschips.com/kl45j6lkj45.htm
Clean Undies
http://www.buffaloschips.com/kl54j6k54l.htm
coca cola
http://www.buffaloschips.com/nvhjkdvghdfk.htm
sexx1
http://www.buffaloschips.com/mghdkflgdf.htm
big wood
http://www.buffaloschips.com/,dgjdlfgfd.htm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The One Stop Snuggie Total Shop
Americas Favorite Blanket with Sleeves!
Weve got every Snuggie ever made:
-Original Snuggie
-Designer Snuggie
-Snuggie for Dogs
-Outdoors Snuggie
-Snuggie for Kids
-Sports Snuggies and More!
Why buy a Snuggie anywhere else?
Order Now!
http://tinyurl.com/2345j9l
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Erotic Correction
Sally Jo taught erotic correction.
She told her student to get an erection.
"Put your dick in my mouth.
Move it north, move it south
Now, you're getting a sense of direction!"
Her instructions were very explicit,
and more than a little illicit:
"Please fill up my cunny
with fresh clover honey,
and butter my buns like a biscuit."
"Then wrap me up nice in a blanket,
and I'll sit on your staff while you crank it.
I'll put on some feathers,
and laces and leathers,
and wiggle my ass while you spank it."
"Now that your fingers are stinky,
tie me up in some chains that are clinky.
Bring in some goats and a sheik.
Then give my big titties a tweak
and now, we can start getting kinky!"
"Forget what the chain and the whip meant.
Just get the straps and the slings and a shipment
of high grade Vaseline,
and a strong trampoline,
and all of the other equipment!"
"Now, when we get all the bedsprings a drummin',
that's when I'll start in a hummin',
then quickly, my dear,
put it into my ear,
so I'll hear the sound of it comin'!"
"I don't know how much this is costing,"
said her student, still covered with frosting.
"But I can say with affinity
that I've lost my virginity.
Quite frankly, my dear, you're exhausting!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tired of paying way too much for your ink and toner?
Then you're in luck, because at ClickInks we're obsessed with saving you
money! With our buy 2, get 1 free offer on select cartridges, free
shipping on orders over $49, and a 100% money back guarantee you've got
nothing to lose and EVERYTHING to gain!
Get an extra 10% off by entering "SAVINGS10" at checkout!
Just visit http://buffaloschips.com/clink
to start saving!
We're looking forward to hearing from you!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A shapely Finnish girl was a counselor at a girl's camp on Wonder
Lake.
She was at the camp a day early to get things in order, and when her
work was done, she thought it would be nice to start a sun tan "au
natural", since this was private property. Suddenly, she heard male
voices! She jumped up, stood in a crouch, and covered her bosom
with crossed arms. Two young men approached her, asking "Which way
is it to the boy's camp on Wonder Lake?" She said, "Oh, I know you
guys, you just want me to point, so you can see my titties!"
"No, no," they said, "we just want to know what direction we must
go, we're lost."
"O.K., she said, straightening up, and standing on her right leg and
lifting her left leg horizontally, she said, "It's over dat way!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Relieve your foot pain with WalkFit Platinum
Walk-fit cups the foot with durable support to relieve discomfort!
Distributes your weight evenly across your foot to help prevent
collapsing, pressure points, stress and rubbing. This reduces painful
burning, bunions, corns, and calluses.
It also eases impact by evenly distributing the force of each step!
Flexes and cushions to help absorb destructive shock waves from
traveling up through your entire body every time your foot hits the
ground!
NEW! Cushions your heel for ultimate comfort! A cushioning gel pad in
the heel provides extra shock absorption and comfort.
NEW! Kills germs and odors! Advanced Nanosilver antibacterial technology
kills germs and odors as you walk. Your feet, shoes and orthotics stay
fresh all day, everyday!
http://buffaloschips.com/wfpl
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 2072
Freedom Rings!!!
Sandi Concludes: The fourth stanza, a pious hope for the future, should
be sung more slowly than the
other three and with even deeper feeling:
Oh! thus be it ever, when freemen shall stand
Between their loved homes and the war's desolation,
Blest with victory and peace, may the Heaven - rescued land
Praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation.
Then conquer we must, for our cause is just,
And this be our motto --"In God is our trust."
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.
It is my hope that you will look at the national anthem with new eyes.
Listen to it the
next time you have a chance, with a new understanding. Pay attention to
the words
and don't let anyone ever take it away .... not even one word of it.
Freedom does not come free.
Rudy: Hear hear!
Val: I will salute her everytime she passes.
Katie: I say vote often!
The herd
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult
*********************************************
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
To unsubscribe send a blank e-mail to Buffalos-adult-jokes-unsubscribe@egroups.com
Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
No comments:
Post a Comment