THE POSTMAN
So a big shout out to my long time bud, Joe. He has been reading.
this page like forever, and I hope things work out ok for you Joe! He is
having a rough time lately. Personally. I Just got home this
morning myself from having a "sleep study" They are trying
to figure out what changes they can make on my cpap machine to make
life be a little better for me That would be great. I am a little tired because
those things are ironically difficult for sleep. When you do a "study" like
that, they have like 14 thousand wires belts and etc hanging off you and
then want you to fall asleep. Yeah right. But that is ok, I can hybernate
nicely this weekend as we are bracing for a huge winter storm.
Wonderful huh?
ENJOY THE JOKES!!
One day, a teenage boy was absolutely over the moon that he had just passed his driving test.
Then, just as his father was expecting, the boy approached his dad asking when they'd be able to
have a discussion about him using the family car. His father said he'd make a deal with his son:
"You need to bring your grades up from a C to a B, study the Bible, and get a haircut. Then we'll talk
about the car.'The boy thought about it for a moment, decided he'd settle for the offer, and they came
to an agreement.After about six weeks, his father said: "Son, you've brought your grades up and I've
observed that you have been studying the Bible, but I'm disappointed you haven't cut your hair yet."
The boy said: "You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that, and I've noticed in my studies of the
Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair - and there's
even strong evidence that Jesus had long hair!"
The dad nodded wisely, then leaned over and whispered to his son:
"Did you also notice they walked everywhere they went?"
The English teacher of the girls school used to fail all her students who did not put a full-stop at
the end of their sentences.
I guess, she really hated it when her girls missed their periods.
You should treat your woman the way you treat your Hoover
When it stops sucking, change the bag.
FEMALE POEM
I want a man who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen all day long.
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I want him to be gainfully employed,
And when I spend his cash, not be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! For a man who makes love to my mind,
and knows what to answer to "How big is my behind?"
I want this man to love me to no end,
And forever be my very best friend.
MALE POEM
I want a deaf-mute nymphomaniac,
with huge boobs
who owns a liquor store and a fishing boat.
I know this doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.
A couple were going at it in a barn down on the farm.
In the process, the condom slipped off.
The guy pokes around inside her with a straw and manages to lose that too.
Nine months later the doctor enters the waiting room where the father asks him what the baby is.
Doctor replies "It's a little bastard dressed in a raincoat and a straw hat."
sniffer dog
custody
new computer
if Tuesday were a movie
LSD
play dead
watch out for signs
the only thing
my photo
stop embarrasing me
it won't die
the computer store
trained him well
101 headache cures
wouldn't it be nice
_._,_._,_
Groups.io Links:
You receive all messages sent to this group.
View/Reply Online (#34) | Reply To Group | Reply To Sender | Mute This Topic | New Topic
Your Subscription | Contact Group Owner | Unsubscribe [potty.plant@gmail.com]
_._,_._,_
No comments:
Post a Comment