A frayed knot

Surprise me View in browser June 14, 2019 Getting super literal with this photo by Kristian Strand via Unsplash    This week A joke that I've been thinking about lately: A piece of rope walks into a bar. The bartender (who happens to be an anti-rope bigot) looks at her and says "Get out, we don't serve your kind in here!" Grumbling, the rope goes back outside, where she cuts herself in half vertically, and twists and ties her two sections together. She combs out the ends. Then she re-enters the bar, and when the bartender says, "Hey, weren't you just—" The rope interrupts, "I'm a frayed knot." That's me re-entering the bar! Lately, I'm a frayed knot. Nearing the end of the first draft of this book-writing process, I am simultaneously tangled up and undone. And by choice. Like the anthropomorphic rope outside the bar, I did this to myself. I'm trying to use clever words to find a way through bigger and deeper problems. And I have been driven to drink. This Elena Ferrante quote, which the inimitable Carrie Frye included in her newsletter this week, puts a positive spin on the frayed-knot feeling: "It’s necessary to recount the tangle of existence, both as it concerns individual lives and the life of generations." In an addendum that felt meant for me, Carrie wrote, "Searching to unravel things is useful, but literature is made out of tangles." And so a frayed knot I remain, as Amina and I make our way toward our deadline in early July. In the meantime, please enjoy this interview with adrienne maree brown, an incredible thinker, writer, and activist, who is knotting together the quest for justice and the pursuit of pleasure. I'm reading Life and debt stories from inside America's GoFundMe health care system. The search for one missing Native American woman, and the movement seeking justice for thousands. Mining lithium for batteries is taking a toll on the Atacama Desert. An on-the-ground report on America's involvement in Syria's civil war. The devastating fire that destroyed a precious music archive. A horrifying story about disappearing bodies at a funeral home. The fallacy of "life begins at conception." We should be talking about perimenopause! Jada Pinkett Smith is rethinking the talk show, and Gayle King is saving an established one. Even Rihanna needs personal days. The queen of eating shellfish on YouTube. A great story about RBG and Nina Totenberg's friendship. Hollywood reconsiders the bad female boss. The working witches of Los Angeles. The rebellious lessons of beloved children's book character Amelia Bedelia. "This is becoming my only advice in life right now: Don't make decisions out of fear or shame." An ode to Robyn's "Dancing on My Own." The pandemonium of modern celebrity began in 19th-century theatre. A historic breakthrough for sex workers' rights. A woman denied justice buys a billboard instead. Pay the U.S. women's national soccer team. Elizabeth Warren's policy barrage, and profiles of Tulsi Gabbard and Andrew Yang. Spies take to LinkedIn. How to spot a viral fake. What it's like to use a 30-year-old computer. McMansions aren't making people happy. There is too much stuff, yet I support people registering for non-marriage events. On summer crushes. Members only Become a paying member for just $5/year. I'd love your support. This week, you're missing a truly excellent pie chart about daddies. I'm looking & listening "Consider what the most powerful least want you to do, and then do that." Nice Try, a podcast about attempts to create utopias. On the Media on eviction. A delightful tour of Marc Balet's loft, with commentary by his friend Fran Leibowitz, who hates it. GIFspiration An excellent knot-themed gif but also... it's very much still Pride Month, and Popeye's vibe is very Tom of Finland. I endorse Taking several deep belly breaths while watching animations of knots. You've got answers Here are some habits we wish we could instantly create for ourselves: Waking up early. Ugh. Apparently its writing down my dreams because I've threatened to this for years and all it would take is a notebook and a pent next to my bed and yet *shrug emoji* Meditation Sending birthday cards in the mail (I love getting them, but can't seem to stay consistent in sending) Creating and tracking an actual budget Journaling! I want to look back on my history, but ugh, I also want to sleep. Doing sit ups. Yuck. Green thumb. I want to be a plant mom so badly, but instead my plant graveyard keeps growing. Daily doodling. Practicing guitar chords every week Cooking after work instead of dining on cheese and crackers all the time Sitting down to eat NOT in front of a computer or TV Composting. Picking out my outfit the night before. I dream about the time I would save in the morning and how much chicer I could be! Putting my clothes away at the end of the day (OR EVER?) Turning the light off every time I leave a room. A summery one for next week: Where's your favorite solo travel destination?   >> Click to submit an answer. << The Classifieds Our alumni say the Program is “Eye-opening” & “Stabilizing.” Build your biz with support & actionable advice. We begin July 1. Apply now! It’s hard to sit in a room and have someone staring at you, waiting for you to speak up. Sacred Cycle founder Heather Russell uses mountain bikes to help unlock minds and bodies stuck in a traumatic memory. → The Issue Is: Bikes As Healers, presented by Specialized Bicycles PRIVATE PARTS UNKNOWN is a podcast exploring love & sexuality around the world. Check out recent eps on feminism in Finland, “red state” queer love & a strippers union. Fuel your creativity, go deep, and slow down with Time Sensitive, a new weekly podcast featuring leading minds on time. These ads are a great option for super-small businesses. Click for rates and info. Testimonials "Thank you for what you do -- what you write, what you share, and how you support me and my LGBTQ+ community. I'm thankful every day for allies and amazing people like you. Happy Pride!" -Scott. Feeling very grateful for you, Scott, and for all my readers celebrating Pride this month and always! Especially those of you who took the time to email me last week. 🌈♥️ This newsletter definitely serves your kind! Forward it to someone you'd never string along. AF WEEKLY Subscribe Share on Twitter Share on Facebook Manage paid membership MORE ANN Email me About me Writing archive Public speaking Rent my brain Manage Preferences | Unsubscribe | Ladyswagger, Inc. PO Box 26932 | Los Angeles, CA 90026 © 2019