THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
Those who give hoping to be rewarded with honor
are not giving, they are bargaining.
Philo
______________
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
This is a silly time of year. The holidays
are done, and you have a fridge full of left
overs to eat. The war department cooked a turkey
for Christmas and we have been eating turkey
sandwiches until last night. Me and daughter protested
loudly enough that she finally froze what was
left in the freezer. While that does provide some
relief, it also means we shall have to deal with it
later. You get a day or two off at xmas, then you
have to make a work appearance for a few days until
New Years, then you get a couple more days off. New
Years is a stupid holiday. It has no meaning and is
relatively useless unless you are a drunk. I Never did
understand why companies don't just close down for
a week from xmas to new year. Nobody ever accomplishes
anything worthwhile this week. Which reminds me. The president
returns from Hawaii to work on the so called "fiscal cliff".
I wish our political leaders would just put aside differences and
find a solution to an out of control budget. In the meantime,
Turk the dog, aka Carlos the rat particularly enjoyed the holiday.
He found a large remnant of leftover Christmas dinner crumbs
and such for the next day or so on the floors. Having a toddler
grandchild around the house seems to make the little chihuahua
a little happier these days. He can usually run faster than
the grand baby. He lets out a mighty bark when he decides
he does not like what Addison has found amusing. The stores are
all trying to decide what to do to boost sales now that the
shopping spree is done. And everyone watches to see if Best Buy will
go the way of Circuit City or if it will survive another year.
All in all, none of this really matters much. Time marches on.
Another year is upon us despite the naysayings of the Mayan
doomsdayers.
I hope you all have a great weekend!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
__________
hey sweet thing
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laziness
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after Christmas
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don't apologize
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you heard me
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your late husband
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bend over
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______________
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Johnny is visiting the zoo with his mother. They go to the
elephant exhibit, where a big old bull elephant is taking a leak.
Johnny points to the pachyderm's privates and says, "Mommy,
what's that?"
Mommy, seeing the huge member, turns bright red and says, "Oh,
that's nothing. Never mind. Come along now."
A few weeks later, Johnny is at the zoo with his father. Johnny
grabs his dad by the hand, and pulls him over the elephants,
saying he has a question.
Once there, Johnny points to the elephant's member and says,
"Daddy, what's that?"
Dad replies, "Didn't your mother tell you?"
"Yes, she told me it was nothing."
"Well, your mom is spoiled, son."
________________
I pulled into a town I couldn't believe still existed in 2010.
A dusty, dirt road, a little old wooden store that actually said
"General Store," and that was it.
There was a little old man sitting in front of the store in a
rocking chair. I said to him, "What do you folks do around here?"
"we fuck"
I said, "What do you do when you are not fucking?"
"We go hunting."
"What do you hunt for?"
"Something to fuck"
_____________
A woman, on meeting a psychologist at a party, made a pitch for
some free professional advice. "What kind of toy would you suggest
giving a little boy on his third birthday?" she asked.
"First I'd have to know more about the child," the psychologist hedged.
The woman took a deep breath. "He's very bright and quick-witted and
exceptionally advanced for his age," she said. "He has good coordination,
expresses himself very well..."
"Oh, I see," the psychologist said. "It's YOUR child!"
__________
There was a young lady named May,
Took a stroll in the park by the bay.
She met a young man,
Who screwed her and ran.
Now she goes to the park everyday.
THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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