Plants gone potty!: [PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner

When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves
did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones,
and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure.
Then Mrs. Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to
visit, which stressed Santa even more.
When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that
three of them were about to give birth
and two others had jumped the fence and were out, Heaven knows where.
Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked,
the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scattered.
Frustrated, Santa went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum.
When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the
elves had drunk all the cider and hidden the liquor.
In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into
hundreds of little glass pieces all over the kitchen floor.
He went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten
all the straw off the end of the broom.
Just then the doorbell rang, and an irritated Santa marched to the door, yanked
it open, and there stood a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.
The angel said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, Santa.
Isn't this a lovely day?
I have a beautiful tree for you.
Where would you like me to put it?'
And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.
Not a lot of people know this.
_________________

Hugh Hefner is 86 years old and his bride-to-be is 26. It's one of
those May-December things. He may not make it until December. Hugh is
ready for the honeymoon. He is already hooked up to a Cialis drip.
(David Letterman)

Hugh Hefner announced Tuesday that he and his former fiancee Krystal
Harris have made up after last year's break-up and they will get
married at the Playboy Mansion next week. He's eighty-six and she's
twenty-six. They plan to have an open-casket wedding. (Argus Hamilton)

86-year-old Hugh Hefner is engaged and he has picked up a marriage
license with his 26-year-old fiancé. Remember it wasn't that long
ago that Hugh was engaged, but then at the last minute she broke it
off. Uh, pool choice of words. She "called off their engagement."
Better. (Tim Hunter)

Hugh Hefner and Crystal Harris are planning on finally going through
with their wedding plans. She is 26 and he is 86. She is registered
at Tiffany and he is registered at Forest Lawn. (Jim Barach)
______________

Pauly was happily riding his brand-new bike in the neighborhood and runs
up on a mounted policeman. The cop comes over to Pauly: "Hey, kid. Did
Sandy Claus get you that bike for Christmas?"
Pauly: "Yep."
Cop: "Well, take this ticket to your daddy and tell him that a lamp is
now required on the front of all bikes."
Pauly: "And did Sandy Claus give you that beautiful horse for Christmas?"
Cop, playing along: "Yep, he sure did."
Pauly: "Well, you can tell Sandy Claus that the asshole goes under his tail
and not on his back."
____________

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THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman

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Plants gone potty!

[PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner

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