people said follow your dreams.
So I just went back to bed.
welcome to
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
So. HAPPY LABOR DAY! to all of my readers here in
the states. And to everybody else reading eh?
It is sort of a sad holiday. It's the last chance for a holiday
before Thanksgiving. It also marks the end of summer. Groan.
Winter is a coming. Last chance for a long weekend drunk?
or are you into the adult thing and a chance to get that
end of the year yard work done or last minute sprucing
up around the house? And you know what?
OMG By now your chilluns or your gran chilluns have
been back to school a day or two. Remember when we
were kids, school always started after the holiday? How
does that work? You would think that with the advent of
Google, there would be less for the kids to learn. So shouldn't
the school year be shorter? Instead they are going longer.
Maybe kids are dumber these days?Ah, go figger right?
And summer vacation. Does anybody do that anymore?
I think I had two of them this year. One time this
summer I traveled to the back yard. The other time I
went to the fridge and with lock down, I just sort of spent
the rest of the summer there.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
__________________________
MEMES N TOONS
when we grow up
interesting
dad or mom
on the first date
ways to ask for money
Oprah
allergy clinic
souvenir magnets
fashion
its clean
the clock strikes midnight
runs right through you
in my mouth
flirting with death
offending
A guy goes to the Post Office to apply for a job.
The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"
He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee."
"Ok, Have you ever been in the military service?"
"Yes," he says, "I was in Iraq for one tour."
The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment.
Are you disabled in any way?"
The guy says, "Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I
lost both my testicles."The interviewer grimaces and then says,
"Okay. You've got enough points for me to hire you right now.
Our normal hours are from 8:00 am to 4:00 pm. You can start
tomorrow at 10:00 am, and plan on starting at 10:00 am every day."
The guy is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8:00 am
to 4:00 pm, why don't you want me here until 10:00 am?"
"This is a government job", the interviewer says.
"For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee
and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that."
An 86-year-old man went to his doctor
for his quarterly check-up...
The doctor asked him how he was feeling, and the
86-year-old said ,'Things are great
and I've never felt better.'
I now have a 20 year-old bride
who is pregnant with my child.
"So what do you think about that Doc ?"
The doctor considered his question for a minute
and then began to tell a story.
"I have an older friend , much like you,
who is an avid hunter and never misses a season."
One day he was setting off to go hunting.
In a bit of a hurry , he accidentally picked up his
walking cane instead of his gun."
"As he neared a lake , he came across a very large
male beaver sitting at the water's edge..
He realized he'd left his gun at home and so he couldn't
shoot the magnificent creature.
Out of habit he raised his cane , aimed it at the animal as if
it were his favorite hunting rifle and went 'bang, bang'."
"Miraculously , two shots rang out and the
beaver fell over dead.
Now, what do you think of that ?" asked the doctor.
The 86-year-old said ,
"Logic would strongly suggest that somebody else
pumped a couple of rounds into that beaver."
The doctor replied , "My point exactly."
__________________
JOKES
there were no parachutes
seagulls on the beach
sex after fifty
sex and parking spaces
evaluated for mental problems
repeat repeat repeat
the seat is empty
swerved to avoid a deer
you are a clever bird
couldn't find my luggage
trick or treat
in the jungles of Africa
while diving off the coast
stopped at a bar
there was a young plumber named Lee
_______________________
A LITTLE BIT OF HUMOR
the voice of reason
it hurt my eyes
bad with names
is there an intruder
it is rude
folding a fitted sheet
given how often I have to
what would you do
never make fun of me
upsetting my wife
they were at a wedding
a male octopus
the facebook logo
mom and dad
the most difficult part
__._,_.___
Posted by: "Martin a.k.a. the postman" <martin7957@yahoo.com>
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