Some days you are the bug; some days you are the windshield.
welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
HELLO POSTMAN FANS!
A beautiful day today here in God's country,...
beautiful west Michigan! The temps are a mild
50 degrees at five am and promise to be no more
than low 80's today, so says the weatherman. He also
proclaims "no rain" for the next couple of days. !!!
I suppose this morning feels so good because the power
grid is WORKING!! It is so good to have it functional again.
Seems like it is one of those things, you do not miss it till it is
gone. Apparently that is so true of the postman also. I received
hundreds of emails while I was offline. I did not get a note to every
body using my phone to tell y'all that I was knocked out cuz of the
outage for a couple days.. So tons of people wrote in asking where
I was, was I ok? Etc. I thank all of you that I was missed and
that everyone was concerned about my well being.
In the meantime, I am BAAAAACCCCKKKK!!!!! :)
BTWm may I point out, today's issue is,
I think is especially good today,
Enjoy!!!
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_________________________
MEMES N TOONS
so close
accidentally
she fell
all you have to know
give him a job
45 minutes
Dr. Spock
spoiled
a fishing licence
the instructions said
the three bears
at the fitness club
stalemate
the movie
shout dirty
__________________
JOKES
something to think about
man goes into the pharmacy
Disney world
your gout is worsening
the honey moon is over
president Roosevelt and Honey Boo Boo
safety is a major concern
the organist
he had a bad case of the flu
out of gas
asking the Lord's forgiveness
This couple had only been married for two weeks.
The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out
into town and party with his old buddies, so he says to his new
wife, "Honey, I'll be right back..."
"Where are you going coochy cooh...?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer."
The wife says to him, "You want a beer my love?"
Then she opens the door to the refrigerator and shows him 25
different kinds of beer brands from 12 different countries:
Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc. The husband doesn't know
what to do, and the only thing he can think of saying is, "Yes,
loolie loolie...but the bar.... you know...the frozen glass..."
He didn't get to finish the sentence, when the wife interrupts
him by saying, "You want a frozen glass puppy face?"
She takes a huge beer mug out of the freezer so frozen that she
was getting chills holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, says, "Yes, tootsie roll, but at
the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really
delicious...I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres poochi pooh?"
She opens the oven and takes out 15 dishes of different hors
d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in a blanket, mushroom caps, pork
strips,etc."But sweet honey...at the bar...you know...the swearing, the
dirty words and all that..."
"You want dirty words cutie pie?...HERE, DRINK YOUR FUCKING BEER
IN YOUR FROZEN FUCKING MUG AND EAT YOUR FUCKING SNACKS, BECAUSE
YOU AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE! GOT IT ASSHOLE?!!"
An Asian man visiting New York walks into a bank to exchange 20,000
yen and receives $150. He goes back a week later to exchange another
20,000 yen but this time he's only given $146.
He asks the teller why he got more the first time, and the teller
replies,"Fluctuations."
"Oh yeh?" the Asian man says, "fluc u amelicans, too!"
Okay, I admit I'm not very good at oral sex.
But my wife doesn't have to keep rubbing my nose in it?
What do you call someone who puts poison in a person's corn flakes?
A cereal killer.
______________________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Hit and Run Driver - Brazen Acts Caught on Tape
Remembering The Cast from HEE HAW
Rainy Day Pranks - Best of Just For Laughs Gags
Charlie And The Seal!
Mel Blanc - Telegram for Jack Benny
Spacer Installation on 765,000 volt line
Duck Can't Stand It When Her Babies Get Stuck In A Pool
Costco Thieves Run Right Out The Door And into Seattle Police
Candid Camera Classic: Hydrant on Your Lawn
When The Customer Is Always Right & The Loader Don't Give A Fuq
_________________________
A LITTLE BIT OF HUMOR
its rude
a fitted sheet
the world's worst
a klondike bar
to my children
it upsets my wife
how many wives
a male octopus
the facebook logo
mom and dad
the most difficult part
grandma and grandpa
a 50$ fine
suicidal
power tools
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Posted by: martin7957@yahoo.com
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