Show up flawed and messy

Surprise me View in browser January 11, 2019 Mimi Gross    This week On the podcast, we go through the history of hurt feelings, anger, and "can't we all just get along" attitudes within the Women's March—and talk about the value of working on complicated questions of power and privilege from within. Fighting for freedom isn't a pleasant task undertaken by nice ladies; it's difficult and complex and often maddening. And if it were easy, this work would be done already. I've written before about how taking the long view on social justice really helps me stay committed. And it's useful to think long-term not only in terms of external change that you desire in the world, but also internal change. The point isn't for everything to be harmonious all the time. The point is for flawed and messy people to keep showing up, keep disagreeing, and keep working together to get free. I'm reading Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and what happens when people of color enter elite spaces. The cancer treatment you get is determined by the money you have. The low-wage subcontractors whose lives are being decimated by the government shutdown. The changing demographics of Avon ladies—and their customers. The Kondo effect on thrift stores and secondhand shops. On millennials and burnout. (I always wonder if I don't relate to a lot of millennial trend pieces because I'm one of the oldest millennials, barely making the cutoff, or because all "generational" trends are inherently bullshit? Anyway.) On moving to a smaller city in your 40s. "I would like to feel in control of my work, and I want to be creatively responsible for myself." How the tech industry's annual gadgetfest disregards women's pleasure. The state of the male gaze. Traditional masculinity is harmful to boys, says the APA. Inside weapons-training programs for teachers. Spending time with the Border Patrol to learn about the effects of Trump's rhetoric. On class shame as a political force. Don't ignore the hateful things that Viktor Orbán is up to in Hungary. What South Africa might show us about a post-Trump America. The silver linings of insomnia. "When fighting on behalf of someone you love, the fight must end, the love must be the art of being present." Members only Become a paying member for just $5/year. I'd love your support. What are you missing? Usually, pie. Click here to see what these charts are all about. This week, you're missing a chart about Jeff Bezos's sexts and everything bagels. If you're a paying member and you're NOT seeing anything in this section, email laura@ladyswagger.com for troubleshooting help. I’m listening This episode on apologies from The Cut on Tuesdays. This episode on the planet Venus from In Our Time. The Kitchen Sisters' series on collectors and their collections. GIFspiration I hope AOC never stops dancing and practicing Shine Theory. I endorse The InnBox. This is the time of year I love thinking about places I could possibly travel to in the next 12 months if I can get my budget and schedule together. I love Sabrina Majeed's The InnBox, a newsletter and Insta account featuring reviews of affordable, relaxing, interesting places to stay. All hotels she picks are luxurious yet under $300/night, and she reviews everything, from check-in process to décor to accessibility. I've never actually stayed at a place she recommends, but reading her newsletter is like taking a tiny mental vacation to a warm, faraway place. You endorse Adding your preferred pronouns to your email signature. "If you are cisgender, adding your pronouns to your email signature is a super easy way to show solidarity with trans and gender nonconforming folks. A. It normalizes the practice. B. Friends and colleagues who notice may ask you about them which then starts a conversation about gender pronoun usage (and takes some burden off our trans and GNC friends to do this work themselves). I have had four conversations with professional contacts about this since recently adding my pronouns to my email signature, and two of those folks, whose positions are more visible than mine, have since added pronouns to their signatures, and one even talked to some of their staff about it." -Alison. Ed note: I really appreciate this reminder and I FINALLY did this after reading Alison's endorsement. Thanks for the nudge. What's something you're glad you did/read/ate/watched/downloaded? Tell us all about it. The Classifieds The Snoozeletter is the nightly self-care newsletter to uplift and relax you right before bedtime. Imagine losing internet, power, and your sense of security in 2 minutes. The Big One is coming and KPCC has your survival guide. Listen now. Wanna reconnect with meaning+even spirituality in 2019? The Sunday Soother newsletter offers writing+tips on living a modern spiritual life. Here's a good New Year's resolution: Have a kinder, more respectful relationship with food + your body. This free newsletter explores how to do it. These ads are an affordable way to promote something you're working on and want more people to know about! Click for rates+info. Testimonials "I've got such newsletter burnout (and all media burnout) but I still love reading yours." -Ellen. Wow truly the greatest testimonial. "Gotta pass on the rec from my best friend @kfplomatos and suggest y’all subscribe to @annfriedman’s weekly newsletter. I look forward to it every Friday" -Jenny. I love being bestie-endorsed! Have you forwarded this newsletter to your core people yet? This newsletter is settling in for the messy long haul. Forward it to another flawed human who's working to get free. 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