Instructions for living a life

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This week
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Colonialism and partition are coming home to roost for Britain's ruling class. The case for sticking with the Women's March, and an interview with its leaders about accountability. An interview with the photographer who took those unbelievably weird Paul Ryan pumping iron pics in 2011. Rachel Cusk on driving. R.O. Kwon on trying to avoid being assaulted. The cost of insulin is skyrocketing, and now there's a black market for it. What it's like when someone you love gets right-wing radicalized. How burnout is different for black millennials. How one man feels in his 460-pound body. On being a 4-year-old with the body of a teenager, and a 9-year-old who's already in college. Trans children know who they are. What we lose when we lose queer sex scenes. The era of the notes app mea culpa. A diet to feed 10 billion people. Why so many chefs love Popeyes fried chickenRelatability and likability are overrated. The golden girls who decided to spend eternity togetherRIP, RSS.


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Mary Oliver reads her poem "Wild Geese." Portraits of the women of the 116th Congress. "What a chill time to be an American." An animated history of cheese. A photographer's private portraits through 60 years of marriage. Sasheer Zamata re-does a Louis CK "joke" and makes it good. The new Sharon Van Etten album.  

GIFspiration

I endorse
Mary Oliver's instructions for living a life:
 
Pay attention.
Be astonished.
Tell about it.

This is a stanza in her poem "Sometimes," and it's also great professional advice for writers. (I'm not the only one who thinks so.) It's a more economical version of something I used to say as an editor: If you find yourself thinking about something nonstop and noticing it everywhere, odds are you have something to say about it. Or at least a question to ask about it. And maybe you should be finding a way to communicate that to the world. Oliver's instructions are also a deceptively simple explanation for creative droughts: You're not paying attention. You're not letting yourself be astonished. And so you've got nothing to tell the world.

Do an image search for these succinct sentences, and you'll find Oliver's words hand-written in neat but whimsical script, plastered over photos of sunsets and daisies, and painted onto rustic wooden boards you can hang in your kitchen: Pay attention. Be astonished. Tell about it. It's hard for me to admit I love a quote that's been endlessly Pinterest-boarded and reworked by legions of self-styled influencers.

When my own words have been given a typographical treatment and shared by some stranger, I've felt flattered but also found myself cringing. Maybe because this is a medium of communication that's highly feminized, and therefore not respected. ("Is it me or is it internalized sexism?" is a game I play with myself almost every day.) Maybe because I want everyone to come up with their own goddamn mantras and bon mots. Maybe because complicated and difficult sentiments—those with a grappling quality that I admire most in other people's writing—aren't suited to Instagram calligraphy.

The instructions are not the only Oliver line to be aggressively Etsied. There's also this one, from her poem, "The Summer Day":
 
Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?

You've probably seen that one before! Maybe on a keychain? These handmade treasures never include the line that comes before it in the poem, though: 
 
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
 
Put that in your handwritten-font generator and smoke it like a Springsteen lyric! The other stanzas of "Sometimes" don't find their way onto inspirational moodboards, either. Here's a sample. See if you notice a pattern:
 
Death waits for me, I know it, around
one corner or another.
This doesn’t amuse me.
Neither does it frighten me.
 
Mary Oliver died this week, probably not laughing but also, I hope, not frightened. "That side of Oliver’s work is necessary to fully appreciate her in her usual exhortatory or petitionary mode," Ruth Franklin wrote in 2017. "Nobody, not even she, can be a praise poet all the time. The revelations, if they come, should feel hard-won." Tell me about it.

You endorse
Max Richter's "Sleep" album. "It is so peaceful, perfect for listening while reading in a noisy lunchroom, or for actually trying to fall asleep which I believe is what is was made based on." -Alex D.

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Be astonished. Forward it.



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