welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
HELLO POSTMAN FANS!
So, a dreary Wednesday, Here in beautiful West
Michigan, schools are closed today as the whole place is
covered by a massive ice storm ....in the news, umm well
Britain voted no on Brexit. Us yanks are kinda puzzled by politics
across the pond. That will mean y'all won't have to teach Arabic
to yer chilluns right? I forgot now and I even googled it to get it
straight! So I still done know what it means.
Didn't read anything about collusion charges with your
prime minister.Do they do that across the pond? In the meantime,
here in the US, we have the government shutdown. I wonder:
with the government shut down, they will quit spending money
so the deficit will disappear. Plus they won't take out anymore taxes,
outta yer check, right?
Oh well.
politics gives me a headache, So I should prolley quit sayin stupid
stuff and lets have some jokes!
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
__________________
THE FUNNY PAPERS
bubble gum
a thousand dollar check
take down your tree
bullying
a health food diet
an old photo
swear
a bit of fear
bought some shoes
accused of sexual assault
take a shower
aliens
side chick day
forget apples
_______________
JOKES
Judi was sitting at the defendant table
the Magna Carta
are you earning enough to support a family
An Italian, a Scotsman and a Chinese fellow are hired at a construction site
can you support a family
the difference between right and wrong
baby names
The young boy arrived home after having lunch at his father's
office. He ran into the kitchen and said, "Hey, Mom, guess
what? We're getting a kitty cat." The puzzled woman said, "Where
did you hear that?" "From Dad." "Your father hates animals. I can't
believe he'd buy you one." The boy shrugged. "I heard him plain
as day. He told another guy in the office that as soon as I left,
he was going out to get a little pussy."
An avid male golfer's buddies were going to be out of town for the weekend so he
decided to go down to the golf course and see if any group might need a fourth member.
Sure enough there were three women and they were glad to have him join them.
Since he was the guest, they decided to let him tee off first. The man teed off and his
ball sliced badly to the right and landed in a sand trap. The man immediately exclaimed "Oh shit!"
One of the women reminded him that he was playing with three ladies and not his male
buddies and that ladies do not appreciate that kind of language. The man promptly
apologized and promised it would not happen again.The woman who had spoken to him about
the cursing then teed off and her ball hit a tree and then caromed off into the same sand trap.
She immediately said "Oh shit!"The man spoke up and said that he realized he was a guest but
it seemed like there was a double standard in that the woman used the same word that he was
told he should not use.
The woman quickly replied, "There's no double standard. Your ball didn't hit the fucking tree!"
An attractive lady is waiting in the emergency room.
A doctor walks in to her room and asks her "What is the problem ma'am?"
The lady replies," Doctor, I have been having trouble with my asshole, it hurts really bad."
The doctor tells the woman, "Why don't you lay on your stomach so I can take a look at it, OK?"
So, the woman turns over and the doctor begins to examine her rear end.
After a while, the doctor asks the young lady, "Ma'am, have you had anal sex lately?"
The lady replies, "No, why?"
The doctor then says, "Would you like to?"
A woman hears her husband cussing up a storm from behind the bathroom door. She knocks and says, "Honey, what is it?" Her husband emerges from the bathroom and says, "The doctor prescribed suppositories for this stomach problem I've been having, and no matter what I do, I just can't get the little sucker up my ass. Even the doctor had to shove the first one in to show me how it was done, and I tell you, it took forever for him to get it up there...and it HURT!!!"
"Poor baby," says the wife. "You were probably nervous and tense, and he probably wasn't very gentle with you. Here, let me give you the suppository - I don't mind."
Still grumbling, the husband bends over. His wife puts her left hand on his left shoulder to brace him, and, with her right hand, quickly and easily slips the pill up her husband's rear end. The husband suddenly lets out a bloodcurdling scream.
"My God!" says the wife. "What happened? Did I hurt you?"
"No!" cries the man. "But I just realized that when the doctor did it, he had both hands on my shoulders!"
__________________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Fatal Car Crash Caught on Police Dashcam
America's Funniest Home Videos Best Of Compilation | AFV
Funny Church Signs that will go to Hell
The Privilege Game
Top 10 Most Venomous Spiders
Best of NEAR DEATH CAPTURED 2018
Top Five NHL Hockey Fights of October 2018
Best of Yosemite Sam - Cartoon
BBC Documentary - Living in Siberia #Nomad
Top Stupid Drivers Caught on Camera 2017
Sci-Fi Short Film "Seam" presented by DUST
Being a Millennial
Intruders Shot This Mom Home Alone
88,000 tons of radioactive waste – and nowhere to put it
McDonald Worker Makes Judges Totally SPEECHLESS With Her Unbelievable Voice
Best of the Week by WinArmy /2019
Angry Cats VS Dogs Funny Compilation 2017
___________________
A LITTLE BIT PF HUMOR
first parachute jump
have you ever
bought my ex a chair
red bull or whiskey
till its gone
debt collectors
3 drunk guys enter a taxi
weight watchers
smell this
Scotland
keep your marriage fresh
if a guy...
roses are red
a job at a calendar factory
take you to bed
__._,_.___
Posted by: martin7957@yahoo.com
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