Plants gone potty!: [PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner

A young woman was having a physical examination and
was very embarrassed because of a weight problem. As
she removed her last bit of clothing, she blushed.
"I'm so ashamed, Doctor," she said, "I guess I let myself go."
The physician was checking hers eyes and ears.
"Don't feel ashamed, Miss. You don't look that bad."
"Do you really think so, Doctor?" she asked.
The doctor held a tongue depressor in front of her face and
said, "Of course. Now just open your mouth and say moo."
___________

My wife told me she'd like to be completely pampered for Valentine's
Day, and I'll do my best to oblige. I only hope she's okay
with the fact that in her size, I could only find Depends.
______________

1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory,
but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate.

2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack,
but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.

3. After that, I tried being a Tailor,
but wasn't suited for it -- mainly because it was a sew-sew job.

4. Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory,
but that was too exhausting.

5. Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little
spice to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme

6. Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker,
but any way I sliced it.... couldn't cut the mustard.

7. My best job was a Musician,
but eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.

8. I studied a long time to become a Doctor,
but didn't have any patience.

9. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory.
Tried hard but just didn't fit in.

10. I became a Professional Fisherman,
but discovered I couldn't live on my net income.

11. Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company,
but the work was just too draining.

12. So then I got a job in a Workout Centre,
but they said I wasn't fit for the job..

13. After many years of trying to find steady work,
I finally got a job as a Historian - until
I realized there was no future in it.

14. My last job was working in Starbucks,
but had to quit because it was the same old grind.

15. SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT
AND I FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB !!
_____________________

Top Ten Country & Western Songs .

    10. I Hate Every Bone in Her Body But Mine
      9. I Ain't Never Gone To Bed with an Ugly Woman But I Woke Up With A Few
      8. If The Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me
      7. I've missed You, But My Aim's Improvin'
      6. Wouldn't Take Her to A Dogfight 'Cause I'm Scared She'd Win
      5. I'm So Miserable without You It's like You're Still Here
      4. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend and I Miss Him
      3. She Took My Ring and Gave Me the Finger
      2. She's Lookin' Better with Every Beer
    And the Number One Country   & Western song is...

      1. It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chewed My Ass All Day.
__________

FUN PAGES

Big Rims Under Water Flow
http://tinyurl.com/bhf2ejt

Which Is Worse?
http://tinyurl.com/bcxqzog

Dog Afraid of Pringles
http://tinyurl.com/a4soe4n

She Rolls A Nice Blunt
http://tinyurl.com/ax5zlot

Parables
http://tinyurl.com/a8y9omy
______________

THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM
Martin aka the postman

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Plants gone potty!

[PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner

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